the mermaid
by mystical spirits
Summary: Canon, not AU. Kagome secretly transforms into a mermaid every night. Torn between the mermaid and the miko, Sesshoumaru discovers he isn't as immune to love as he claims to be. But when feelings get complicated, how will Kagome tell him who she really is?
1. stalker

...

**the mermaid  
**by mystical spirits

**[stalker]**

"_There is no man upon the earth, no foolish man or wise,  
No man of high or humble birth but somewhere in the skies  
Can find a star to lead him on if he will lift his eyes."_

...

"Give it a rest, Inuyasha, you can't tell me what to do!"

"You're not leaving, and that's final! We need to find the rest of the jewel shards, or did you forget that already? There's_ no time_ for you to wander around and keep us waiting."

"It's only for two weeks, Inuyasha."

"That's two weeks too long! You listen to me, you ain't going anywhere_—_"

Kagome sighed, watching the two bickering back and forth. It was weird, she thought, that for once it was Sango begging to go home, while she was just a spectator for once. Not that it made much of a difference. Inuyasha, being the stubborn dog he was, wasn't going to stand for anyone leaving the group, especially not for two whole weeks. At least, Kagome thought, not unless Sango played her cards right.

"Inuyasha," Miroku interrupted as calmly as ever, "I think it's best for Sango to return home just this once."

He scoffed huffily. "And why can't we go with her? We won't butt in."

"She is not entitled to be accompanied every part of every day," Miroku argued. "She deserves to make this visit alone."

Kagome shook her head disapprovingly at Inuyasha's stubbornness, Shippou copying her actions in her lap. To be fair, she never expected Inuyasha to take it well when Sango announced her upcoming trip to her old village, but she at least assumed he would _slightly_ understand the situation and let her go. After all, it was the two-year anniversary of her family's deaths, and even though it was Inuyasha, to prevent Sango from making that trip would be certain suicide.

Speaking of which, was that a hidden knife hiding in Sango's sleeve? Kagome almost jumped in to say something about it, but she then decided that if Sango ended up attacking Inuyasha, he probably deserved it anyway.

"Sango will cause too much trouble, being all alone like that," Inuyasha pouted. "Haven't you noticed all the trouble we get into whenever we split up?"

Carefully setting Shippou aside on the log she had been sitting on, Kagome scolded him, ignoring the glint of the hunting knife in Sango's hands. "You know this is the one time Sango needs to be alone right now. If trouble comes, we'll fight it like we always do, but until then Sango should rest at home."

"Well, she doesn't need two weeks to do that," he scowled, knowing perfectly well he had already lost the argument that had been going on for ages now. At least, Kagome figured, he _had_ to have known. He was an insensitive bastard, after all, but not so insensitive that he didn't know how depressed Sango had been lately. (Granted, Kagome had to explain what was going on when they were in private, because he was practically as clueless about girls as a piece of spinach.) But they all kind of knew what was weighing down on Sango lately, though none of them ever even mentioned it.

With Kohaku missing and probably dying somewhere, it only made sense that Sango wanted to get away.

To be honest, Kagome didn't think there was anyone who had it worse than Sango right about now. After Naraku was defeated, everyone else's lives got a little better: Miroku's Kazaana had disappeared, Shippou was beginning to enjoy his youth, Kagome could relax and go to school (though it was now summer holiday), and Inuyasha, although Kikyou was also gone, was starting to finally leave the past in the past. Sango, on the other hand...her trouble wasn't over just yet. None of them knew what had happened to the jewel shard in Kohaku's back, but regardless, he couldn't be doing very well, and because they didn't know where he even was, they felt helpless. _Sango_ felt helpless.

But apparently, Kagome scoffed, Inuyasha didn't seem to think any of that was a good enough reason to stop their shard-hunting. He wasn't always so unreasonable (she almost snorted at the thought), but now with half the jewel re-scattered around Japan, he obviously felt there was no time to waste in collecting them while they could. The greedy bastard.

"Come on, Inuyasha," Shippou continued with his nose in the air, "don't you think Kagome would know best? She's asked you to go home lots of times, and she knows how important it is to get away from _you_."

"What the hell is _that_ supposed to mean, you brat?"

"You know Sango as well as the rest of us," Kagome continued. "She works hard and doesn't complain, and she's always doing her best to help us when she doesn't even have to. She deserves a break." She mentally cheered for her victory, noticing the tiny tick mark pulsing on Inuyasha's forehead.

The hanyou fidgeted, knowing full well Kagome was right, and he looked away to finally give in. Judging by his shifty expression, his pride wouldn't let him make eye contact with anyone. Kagome was seriously getting too used to these constant debates with him, especially since she always seemed to win nowadays, but that was probably due to the fact that Inuyasha was having a harder time saying no to her. "Whatever," he said. "Do what you want, Sango."

The slayer's eyes glazed over, and although she didn't make a huge fuss over finally getting what she wanted, it was clear just how important this trip meant to her. Kagome almost felt sad that Sango was keeping her emotions bottled inside, because the guarded expression on her face was almost pitiful to look at. But the look in her eyes was gone in an instant, and she simply stepped back triumphantly and smiled widely. "I'll be back in no time. You won't even notice I'm gone."

"When are you planning to leave, Sango?" Kagome grinned back, ignoring Inuyasha now that he'd shut himself up.

"Right now, I guess." She looked up at the sky, studying the current time of day. "If I leave now, Kirara and I can make it to the village by sundown."

"I suppose," Miroku said with his usual exaggerated disappointment that lightened the mood almost immediately, "you'd best be off then, Sango."

Grabbing her Hiraikotsu and bag of supplies, she looked at him warily. "Come on, Kirara," she called to the cat cautiously, who immediately mewed and left Shippou's side. The mononoke burst into flames as she transformed into her larger body, prepared to accept Sango onto her back.

"I'll see you guys later," she waved.

"Bye, Sango!" Kagome and Shippou called in unison.

"Here, my dear Sango," Miroku cooed happily, his hands straying toward her backside, "allow me to help you onto Kirara—"

_SLAP!_

Miroku backed away, a red handprint glowing on his grinning face. Sango glared at the monk, her hand still in midair. "Pervert!" she scolded angrily, used to the routine by now.

In a huff, she easily jumped onto her cat and began to ride off, but not without a final stiff wave to the others, Miroku not included.

"Consider that one for the road!" he cried with his cheesy smile. Sango turned her head and glared, rolling her eyes and snubbing him as she rode away. It was her way of saying she loved him.

And together, the four of them – Inuyasha, Kagome, Miroku, and Shippou – watched the taijiya and her pet disappear into the afternoon skies, each with a different expression in their eyes.

"Miroku," Inuyasha said mockingly, "one day we're gonna have to tie up those lecherous hands of yours behind your back."

An evil grin reflected on his face. "Well," he smirked, "I'm sure I can get around that disability just fine."

Inuyasha growled frustratingly. "You pervert! Can't you think about anything _other_ than molesting women?"

Miroku sighed, hesitating. Kagome just had to roll her eyes. "You watch over these two, alright, Shippou?" she sighed exhaustingly. "I'm going to help Kaede with dinner."

The kitsune grinned innocently, standing high on his pawed toes and pointing his thumb at himself in a cocky manner not unlike a certain hanyou's. "You can count on me, Kagome. I'll keep an eye on these immature idiots, no proble—itai!"

Inuyasha had knocked the young fox on the head with his fist and bared his teeth at him. "Who're you calling immature?"

"Well, I'm not the one getting so easily offended!" Shippou sobbed at the lump on his skull.

"Tch, whatever!" he scoffed. "You're the one crying, you little pipsqueak."

"And you're the one who—"

Kagome sighed simultaneously with Miroku, who temporarily allowed his perverseness to drift away to watch the ridiculous little banter. Shaking her head and muttering a bored "osuwari", she turned to walk back towards the familiar hut. She and Kaede had a lot of work to do, making these meals.

Quickening her pace, she smiled to herself, a smile that was too small for anyone else to notice, even if they'd been looking at her. Two weeks, she had two weeks. There were potions to brew and meals to make, and they had to get started.

...

Kagome quietly slipped out from her sleeping bag, making sure to cover Shippou with the top of it so he'd stay warm. She reached a hand into her bag for clothes to change into, but the sundress she chose was too white, white enough to make her skin look even paler and transparent and almost like a ghost or a skeleton or something equally as creepy. It was the only thing she had, though. Her school uniform was supposed to stay inside the hut so those with a keen sense of smell – mainly Inuyasha and Shippou – wouldn't notice she'd left.

Stepping into the otherwise pretty dress, Kagome brushed it off in habit. It was a warm night, humid and stickier than usual, and she was thankful there were no sleeves and that the skirt flowed around her knees in a breezy way. She reached back into her bag and pulled out a white see-through scarf, one Yuka had given her for her sixteenth birthday over a year ago. After untangling it and working away the knots, she tied it into her hair like a headband, a style she had often seen at home on perfume ads and in catalogues.

She finished preparing for the night, zipping everything back up and tiptoeing across the makeshift tatami mats until she was able to push back the sloppily-made shoji door. She looked back once to confirm that everyone was still asleep, and even though Shippou squeaked and rolled over, she was convinced enough to exit Kaede's hut. Quietly, she made her way through the village in her bare feet; bringing shoes was pointless, since she was very ungraceful in them and would have definitely made too much noise to get away. If anything, she wished she hadn't given up on all the dance classes her mom had signed her up for when she was younger.

The journey to the edge of the forest was short and uneventful, and Kagome soon found herself a little more aware of what was on the ground. Knowing her, she would probably step on something sharp or dangerous or something needing medical attention. Despite how long she was taking watching her feet (even though she could barely see them in the dark anyway), she finally walked the whole few miles away from the village.

She was tired and sweating all over when she got there, but she remembered she was going swimming with the fishies in just a few minutes, so she could only smile in relief. She tilted her head back and stretched her arms, feeling the presence of the invisible barrier right in front of her.

The barrier was put up by Kaede, thank goodness for her. Kagome knew she owed a lot to the older priestess. The miko had used her abilities, weak as they were, to raise the barrier so Inuyasha and the others – as well as every other demon who passed by – would never realize a barrier even existed here. It had so far been successful. Like other barriers, this one kept the unwanted out (and just about everyone was unwanted, Kagome made sure). But unlike the usual shield, anyone could walk straight through this one, even make camp in the same clearing, although no one would want to with a village so close by. Whatever the circumstance, no one would be aware the barrier, or what it was hiding, existed.

The trick about the barrier, Kaede had explained once, was that it made the area around it a hallucination. Even though everything was solid, it was completely fake. But to those who knew of the barrier and what it hid inside it, meaning only Kaede and Kagome herself, this specific spot was a beautiful home to many equally as beautiful.

Kagome shook her head as a delightful shiver ran through her. The barrier made her feel warm and fuzzy on the insides.

It wasn't all she had to thank Kaede for, though. The older miko, from day one, had helped Kagome greatly simply by understanding the potent herbs around her.

Every night the Inu-Taichi stayed in the village, the two priestesses would make their meals for them, like they had done tonight. The others never knew what exactly was put into their food. The potion was odorless and tasteless and undetectable, and it would guarantee a long, sound sleep for those who put it in their bellies.

In the mornings, when the others woke up to find both Kagome and Kaede already wide awake, they were always given the excuse that they were simply not late risers. Kaede was _obviously_ used to waking up so early, and Kagome was _so used_ to sleeping in her sleeping bag, she was unfazed by how warm the futons were. On the other hand, the others were _of course_ not used to sleeping so comfortably all the time, so they _naturally_ liked to sleep in. The lies were foolproof.

Kaede was pretty much a genius for thinking this all up herself, Kagome decided. Not only did she put up a barrier and make a sleeping drought, but she also brewed a medicine for Kagome when she wasn't in the area. The schoolgirl "borrowed" an extra eye dropper from her grandpa's medicine cabinet to use it as a measuring device. The potions were supposed to suppress her "unusual characteristics" for the next twenty-four hours, but whenever Inuyasha or anyone else asked her about it, she said it was a medicine her present-day physician was making her take. The explanation, like all the others, reassured any suspicions.

Kagome grinned to herself, perfectly content with the fact that the vile liquid didn't have to be poured down her throat this time. She absolutely hated the burning taste of what she called "that damn hell-in-a-bottle", but aside from that, it always put her under a lot of pain. Transforming in general hurt badly enough, but stopping it from happening increased it tenfold. Thankfully, she had learned to hide the pain from her friends, even if it just made it worse that way.

She winced, already feeling her legs aching. According to the moon and its position in the sky, it was nearly midnight, and _fuck_, she had to hurry.

She jogged her way through the barrier, feeling like she was running through jelly, but also feeling like she was running though nothing at the same time. She watched her feet as she went, noticing at the last second that she was about to stub her toe on a large boulder. She stopped abruptly, but her big toe still stung.

_Damn it_, she thought, shaking it out and looking up at her surroundings. The moon was brighter on this side of the barrier, and she could see everything clearly.

The area was large and spacious, the grass fresh and green and covering every inch of the ground. A few flowers she didn't know the name of had popped up in random splotches, colorful and picturesque. The boulder Kagome ran into was alone and slightly out of place next to a luscious tree, but because it was so close to the center of the clearing and even closer to the edge of the plateau where the water started, she couldn't help but like it. It came up to her middle and curved like most rocks did, but the top was perfectly straight, oddly-shaped but suitable for sitting on.

Despite how cool she thought it was the first time she saw it, Kagome cursed at it under her breath for damaging her foot. That ache was nothing though, and a sharp jerk of pain jolted up both her legs, making her panic and hurry desperately to the edge of the grass. Because she was standing on a plateau and there was no shore, and because the lake was like a swimming pool where the first step into it meant three feet of water, it took no time at all for her to jump in and get soaked.

The body of water she was currently making her way through was large, even larger than the clearing itself. It was bigger than a pond and smaller than an ocean, but for lack of a better term, she just called it a lake. Kagome appreciated how clean and unpolluted the water was, especially compared to how it was in her time, and the moon seemed to shine on it just right, making it glow blue and green and lavender and yellow and a whole bunch of other colors she couldn't quite name.

Swimming farther from the cliff expertly, she stopped entirely right in front of another large rock, this time one that was stuck on the seafloor. It slanted upwards a little, and even though most of the rock was underwater, the part in plain view was twice the size of the boulder by the tree.

Realizing she made it to the rock right on time, she put both her hands on the part of it that was flattest, hoisting herself up to sit down. Her dress was soaked straight through and clung to her skin, and she thanked god no one was around to see her underwear since she was wearing all white.

She looked up at the moon again. _Any second now,_ she thought impatiently. And just seconds after she thought it, it happened.

The moonlight gathered around her with silver and pale yellow light, looking as though it was swallowing her whole. Her eyes automatically squeezed tight as she braced herself.

The light seemed to have a mind of its own, wrapping around her hair until it bunched into a mess of waves, though the length stayed relatively the same. The white scarf around her head dissolved into white pearls that curved around her crown like a dotted line, keeping her hair back. Her chocolate-colored eyes shone, the color suddenly a brilliant blue, and her skin turned two shades darker, the peach-like hue matching the slight gloss that accented the pinkness of her mouth. Although her overall complexion and facial features did not change, the minute differences completely disguised her, and she seemed brighter and somewhat celestial. The light snaked its way down her body. Her dress disappeared, leaving only pearly-white clothing to cover her chest.

And then the light traveled to her legs, squeezing them like a boa constrictor. She clenched her eyes even tighter as pain shot through her thighs, feeling as though a hundred needles were continuously piercing her skin, the sharp edges cutting harder and faster with every stab and a fire-like burning sensation engulfing her legs with something mighty powerful. The pain was nothing compared to the throbbing aches of the "hell-in-a-bottle" potion, but it still brought beads of sweat trickling down Kagome's face, her teeth clenched in agony.

The pain disappeared as suddenly as it began, and she soon relaxed and exhaled heavily, immediately hunching over to catch her breath. She hadn't realized it until now, but she had been holding it. Her legs were now gone, and in their place was a large fin, a remarkable green that shone with what looked to be silver and white glitter, but that was probably just the way the moonlight was hitting her slippery scales.

Strange symbols emerged from her skin like ink seeping through paper. A navy blue arch adorned each of her cheeks, and a star was tattooed on her forehead, though it was mostly covered by her hair. There were twisting lines travelling down her arms, a tiny star or two accompanying them. On Kagome's flat belly, there was another arch on each side, longer and less narrow than the ones on her cheekbones, and they both curved inwardly toward her navel.

The light gradually disappeared and shifted back to its original state. Kagome fell back onto the rock she was sitting on, her arms stretched away from her. She looked up at the black sky and adjusted herself to her new and familiar skin.

And despite herself, despite the pain and the sneaking out and how many lies she had to tell to get to where she was, the only thing she could do was smile.

...

Sesshoumaru held back a groan. He'd never passed through this area before, but he was very well aware who was nearby. Jaken had reported to him many times that this was the area where Inuyasha was pinned to a tree, and now the Inu-Taichi returned to that village every once in a while for whatever reason. Sesshoumaru knew his ungrateful half-brother was resting there right at that very moment since he could smell the stench of the hanyou and his filthy companions and it was clogging up his senses and making him irritable.

But there was one scent out of place. It was much too close by to make any sense. The taiyoukai sniffed silently and suspiciously until he pinpointed what it was and who it meant and where it came from. It was that wench, Inuyasha's human wench.

He didn't know why, but her scent was the closest and most recent in the area, although it disappeared suddenly at the clearing just steps away from him. He inwardly shrugged, not caring in the slightest. She was not his problem, and it was none of his concern why her scent vanished. For all he knew, she could have just run back to the village, following the same trail she took to come here.

All the same, it didn't matter to him. He was only here for the Tetsusaiga.

The plan was simple, so simple he was nearly ashamed it had taken him so long to figure it out. He and Rin would travel into the village and find the hut Inuyasha and his party slept in. There, he would have Rin, who was very much human, take the sword before they would leave again with their prize. It was a dirty trick, he knew, but he was becoming impatient, and he vowed to do whatever it took to take the Tetsusaiga as his own. It would be of no conflict.

Of course Inuyasha was a light sleeper, but with Sesshoumaru's own grace, the hanyou would never suspect he had been here. His own scent could not wake his half-brother, for Sesshoumaru, as a taiyoukai, had learned to mask his presence easily.

The plan would be carried out in a few mere minutes. It would be much easier, though, if Jaken would shut up long enough for them to sneak into the village.

"—and Inuyasha will, of course, never even suspect a thing! Oh, Lord Sesshoumaru! No doubt you shall win the Tetsusaiga! All the same, my lord, why must you heed the assistance of this _mortal girl_—" he looked pointedly at Rin, who remained unfazed, "—rather than myself? Not that you need my assistance, of course, Lord Sesshoumaru, for you are most definitely capable for stealing the Tetsusaiga by yourself. But then again, my lord, how do you plan to take the Tetsusaiga if you are a demon and incapable of touching the sword? Not that you're incapable, of course—"

"Stop."

Jaken finally shut up, staring at his master confusedly. "What is it, my lord?" Rin stopped pulling the reins on Ah-Uhn, watching him with large doe eyes.

Sesshoumaru did not look back at his wards, nor did he answer. He could have sworn he felt something the moment he reached the edge of the forest, something like a sudden jolt of power. _There is a barrier here_, he thought. It was very well hidden, he credited, well enough that he barely sensed it himself. His golden eyes probed the empty space of the clearing. _This barrier is different. It is pure, and yet…_ There was something about it. He had the strongest feeling, a tugging in his gut that pulled him forward, and there was a voice in the back of his mind telling him the barrier would not repel him.

He easily decided on his next move. Inuyasha and the Tetsusaiga would have to wait.

He calmly took a step toward the invisible shield, but something stopped him. An opening large enough for him to walk through seemed to come from the air, like a doorway that could barely be seen except for around the edges. He ignored Jaken and Rin's gasps and prepared to take another step. But he was again interrupted.

At his side, he felt a sword pulse. He looked down at his belt, but he was surprised – although he did not show it – because the pulse did not come from Tenseiga like it usually did. This time it was the Toukijin that vibrated as though it were frightened of what lay ahead on the other side of the invisible walls.

It did not pulse like Tenseiga did from time to time. It jerked and struggled, pulling away fromy the barrier as though it wished to tear apart its sheath in order to escape. It was panicking on its own, tugging and struggling to fly away, and its thrashes were so fierce, Sesshoumaru nearly struggled himself to regain control over his sword. His eyebrows narrowed, releasing the Toukijin from its sheath and throwing it at Jaken's feet. The sword immediately quieted, but Sesshoumaru still felt it pull away cowardly. He could have sworn he heard the wind sighing in relief.

"Do not touch it," Sesshoumaru warned monotonously. He knew his wards would understand. They were aware Toukijin was bathed with evil and power that could easily control them. But Toukijin's actions just now – no, it was just a fluke. It was impossible for the demonic sword to weaken, and surely it was just as powerful as it had always been.

"Yes, my lord," Jaken nodded so ferociously his head could have easily snapped off. "But aren't we to go with you?"

Sesshoumaru ignored him, instead walking into the opening in the barrier wall, which closed shut once he had entered.

"My lord!" Jaken panicked, running to the clearing to follow him. He was disappointed when the barrier neither accepted or rejected him. For reasons he did not understand, the clearing remained as it did before, and there was no trace of a barrier whatsoever.

Sesshoumaru felt the barrier close behind him. Looking around him, he was surprised when he found himself back behind a large amount of trees as though he was back in the forest, the clearing meters in front of him.

A splash was heard, and his interest piqued. A splash meant water, but it also meant someone had to have made the splash. He was not alone here.

He took the steps necessary to reach the edge of the forest, pausing next to a tree with a large trunk. Whatever it was he expected, it was certainly not this.

It was a girl. A _mermaid_.

He let his eyes widen in response. Never had he heard of a mermaid being spotted. There had been brief and vague sections of his father's old scrolls and books that spoke of them from within the dust and old kanji scribbles, but Sesshoumaru felt he knew nothing about them at all when he looked at her.

Never had he seen a more beautiful sight. The mermaid before him was sitting on top of a rock in the middle of a lake Sesshoumaru was sure had not been there before he stepped through the barrier. The splash he heard, he realized, must have been her tail slapping the water when she pushed herself out of it.

Her blue-black hair flowed gracefully down her back, but it did not look wet, which was odd, as she lived in the water. Her skin was soft and creamy, and Sesshoumaru tore his eyes away from the water droplets that slid down her tattooed arms. The blue markings were more tantalizing than he thought they should be, and he immediately noticed the way her facial markings mimicked his own. She turned her head to look behind her, and for the briefest of moments he saw how bright her eyes shone in the light. His eyes traveled downwards to her porcelain face, that pink pouting mouth of hers teasing him more than they should have been.

He narrowed his eyes at her, scolding himself for looking at her body and acting hormonal and very much like a little love-struck boy, which he definitely was not. Never had he been in such a state of mind with these horrid thoughts running through his head. But he could not control himself long enough to turn away from the legendary creature that she was.

Her tail was magnificent, flapping gently the way a cat's tail did when it slept. Its green sparkle rivaled that of her eyes, and he couldn't understand why he was so fascinated with it. Maybe it was because it was proof, proof that he was actually looking at a mermaid and an incredibly attractive one, at that. He had never been very fond of fish except to eat them, their unblinking eyes unnerving him and their gaping mouths disgusting, but for some reason he was not repulsed by the girl. It was the exact opposite, as a matter of fact.

She was combing her fingers through her hair, though there were no tangles to begin with. Sesshoumaru fought back an approving growl. Tearing his eyes away, he became angry with himself. What was the girl doing to him? He was only male and had certainly looked at women before, but he was always uninterested enough to stop himself from looking a second time. This girl, though, he had only looked at her for a moment before he felt himself suddenly becoming infatuated as though he had been in love with her for ages. Maybe this was a spell mermaids liked to cast, he didn't know. Maybe this was why there was a barrier around the lake in the first place. But it didn't explain why Sesshoumaru was able to enter it.

Unable to keep his eyes away for long, Sesshoumaru reluctantly turned to watch her again. He mentally shuddered in revulsion at his newfound weakness, refusing to give in to the girl who was currently swiping her tongue across her lip. The action was quick and subconscious and unintentional on the mermaid's part, but it seemed like slow motion to Sesshoumaru.

He could not look away, no matter how loudly his thoughts were screaming at him to do so. This was his sole moment of weakness. He watched her sit and swim for many hours, and by the time the sun first hinted it was going to rise, he found himself yearning for her more than he believed was possible.

_This is foolish_, he thought. She was just a mermaid, a rare and strange species that was completely different than anything else he'd seen before. She didn't know he existed, and he didn't even know her name or anything about her. As far as he was concerned, only an idiot would fall for a girl like that, and he couldn't let his thoughts linger on her too much.

He forced his eyes away. He had to get back to the others. He knew Rin and Ah-Uhn wouldn't worry, but Jaken was a different story, not to mention Toukijin remained in his ungrateful care. He had to get away from the mermaid as soon as possible.

He began turning around to see the girl one last time, but he stopped himself. He knew that if he looked again, he wouldn't be able to turn away for quite some time.

So he walked away, back through the trees and the barrier to greet his sleeping companions, unwillingly promising himself that he would return later that night.

...

Kagome, again clad in her white dress and head-scarf, her feet still bare, made her way back through the forest and into Kaede's village as quietly as she could. It was already past eight in the morning, she knew, since she usually changed back by that time.

The night before was strange, she thought to herself, furrowing her brow in confusion. She swam all night as usual, but she felt a weird shiver up her spine like someone was watching her, and she knew someone was because she could sense them just a little with her miko abilities. As if that wasn't enough reassurance, she was fully aware of the rustling in the bushes and trees and the silhouette of someone resembling a demon.

But that was impossible. No one, much less a demon, would be able to get through the other side of the barrier. Kaede had said only those welcome were allowed inside, but demons were mostly dangerous, and Kagome was sure she and Kaede had not accepted anyone's entrance otherwise.

So what had happened? Nothing made any sense. She didn't feel entirely comfortable knowing she was being watched in her vulnerable state. She had to ask Kaede about that once she got back to the village.

She sighed, picking up her pace after stinging her foot on a tiny pebble that stuck into her skin. If Kaede had no answers for her, she would find out herself. She would uncover the identity of the mystery demon. She was sure of it.

...

A/N: Revised. I hope it's not as corny anymore, even though it's probably not much better. Also I changed the chapter titles because the old ones sucked. I'm sorry this first chapter still isn't very impressive, but I'm pretty tired of revising by now, so I give up hahahaha oh well.

Disclaimer: RT owns.


	2. encyclopedia

...

**the mermaid  
**by mystical spirits

**[encyclopedia]**

"_Cowards die many times before their deaths;  
The valiant never taste of death but once."  
_—_from William Shakespeare's _Julius Caesar—

...

"Lord Sesshoumaru, look what I found!" He turned his head to the nine-year-old girl, saying nothing but patiently waiting for Rin to show him her discovery. "Look!"

He tilted his head further down, his eyes immediately spotting the small rock in her grimy hands. It was peculiar, he admitted, shaped like a star and with a small hole in the middle. It was painted a dark blue color, but the brushstrokes were barely visible even to his eyes. It looked as though it were dumped in a bucket of paint right before it was set out to dry.

He bit back a gasp in recognition. The stone was an exact replica of the symbol on the mermaid's forehead, the mermaid from the night before.

Speaking of which, he still couldn't get her out of his mind. It was embarrassing, really, because it was already past midday and he was still thinking about her. There was something off with her, something he couldn't exactly pinpoint, and it frustrated him. He wasn't used to being confused. He hated it.

He was still wary though, convinced his sudden attraction to the girl was due to some sort of spell she had cast on him. If mermaids could even do something like that. If they could, he couldn't imagine why she would want to put a spell on him of all people, unless it had to do with that strange barrier.

And about that barrier, it was definitely bipolar. Just hours after he had left, he tried to get back through it to see the girl again. But instead of letting him in, nothing happened at all. He walked straight into the clearing as though the barrier didn't even exist. Did it suddenly disappear because of his intrusion, or was he not allowed back in after that one glimpse? Whatever the reason, he vowed to make camp in the clearing he was currently sitting in, even just for the time being. He continued to mask his scent in case Inuyasha decided to take offense to it, and his wards chose to remain with him. He decided to wait until nighttime came again to test the barrier another time.

"Isn't it pretty, Lord Sesshoumaru?"

Rin's voice jarred him out of his thoughts, which he was thankful for. He didn't want to think about this mystery anymore. He didn't want to think about the mermaid. With the way things were going, he didn't think he could handle it.

"Yes, Rin," he said.

"I'm going to put it on a string and make it into a necklace. Isn't that right, Master Jaken?" She turned and grinned toothily at the toad, who was lying on the ground motionlessly. Rin, in her excitement, had run right over him on her way to Sesshoumaru.

"Yes, Rin," he mumbled with a mouthful of dirt.

"That's right, and I'm going to wear it every single day!" She giggled and ran back into the forest with joy, stepping on Jaken's face again just as he was lifting himself off the floor.

Sesshoumaru watched her run away, tempted to smile at her innocence. The thought stopped suddenly and his stomach felt like it was sinking when he realized the effect the necklace would have on him. Rin would, most likely, be traveling with him for a long while, and if she kept true to her word and wore her new necklace every day, he would be forced to look at it. That wasn't a bad thing exactly, but it didn't comfort him to know he'd always be reminded of that mermaid every time he saw it.

He couldn't afford that. He didn't know how long he could stand the thought of her swimming through his mind, no pun intended.

Even now he couldn't believe how pretty she was. She was astounding, her radiance striking him when he watched her swim. She would lean on the rock in the middle of the lake, holding a hand to her stomach to catch her breath after dancing in the water. Even that simple act made Sesshoumaru burn with a desire he did not understand.

He kept bringing up the idea of a spell she could have used, be it willingly or not, but was angry at himself for jumping to conclusions, something he rarely did. He refused to believe anything until he knew for sure whether mermaids could hypnotize people or not. But who could possibly give him any of that information?

"Inuyasha! Master Inuyasha!"

Sesshoumaru looked up. He saw a tiny speck hopping toward him, and he knew he couldn't have had better timing. From his sitting position, he watched the youkai bouncing closer, amused he didn't noticed the dangerous taiyoukai beneath the tree. After another few hops from the flea, Sesshoumaru held his hand out and caught the bug effortlessly, squeezing his fist tighter.

"Nice catch, Lord Sesshoumaru!" Rin praised him.

Moments later, a head popped out from the top of his fist, the flea's eyes growing wide with recognition at his captor.

"Lord S-Sesshoumaru! Hehe, it's been a while, hasn't it? Uh…" He cleared his throat nervously. "What brings you here?" His chuckled was filled to the brim with anxiety, and he cowered as much as he could in his straightjacket that was Sesshoumaru's hand.

"Myouga," the taiyoukai said, "I have questions that need answering."

"Eh…questions, you say?"

Sesshoumaru gave him a hard look. He didn't know quite where to begin, aware of how foolish he was about to sound, but all the knowledge he wanted on the girl from before had suddenly plopped right into his lap, and there was no chance of him letting it get away. "You've heard of mermaids, I presume?"

"Well, yes, but—"

"What do you know about them?"

Myouga paused in his struggles, staring up at the lord with larger-than-usual eyes. "Mermaids? A lot. Why so interested?" He squeezed his fist tighter, making the flea cry out. "I mean, what do you want to know?"

He paused in thought, but he already knew what his main concern was. "Are there abilities they contain that can affect those not of their blood?"

Myouga looked at him strangely, but he didn't hesitate in answering, a sign he knew what he was talking about. "Abilities? You mean enchantments and hexes, I believe. Eh, no, merpeople cannot perform any spells, per se. The magic they know is not based on incantations, and as far as I know, they can only be done when they are completely submerged underwater. They use plants, rare ones they grow themselves. I've heard rumors, though, that merpeople use their voices to put people to sleep, but then again, I do recall that only a siren's voice is deadly. I've also heard a merman's eyes can be telepathic in some cases, but there's been no proof of that so far."

Sesshoumaru was quiet. According to this newfound information, mermaids could not perform any spells that would seduce a man or a demon. He was unnerved. There was still no explanation for his attraction.

"Lord Sesshoumaru," Myouga said, "what has concerned you so much to ask this ungrateful flea about such things?"

"Myouga," he said, ignoring him, "are merpeople very handsome?"

He lit up, ignoring the obvious change of subject. He was really a very idiotic demon. "Yes, of course! They are said to be the most beautiful of all species, even more so than a demon. No merperson looks alike, they say, but each still have an indescribable beauty about them."

"Then have there been cases when people have become obsessed?"

"My lord," Jaken spoke up, "what is causing such questions?"

Sesshoumaru brushed him off, his gaze becoming even more pointed at the flea until Myouga stopped hesitating. It was unlike him to be so sensitive. "Sometimes men get greedy," he continued nervously. "And other times they simply become intrigued. Lord Sesshoumaru, is it possible you have seen a mermaid and…became attracted to her?"

Sesshoumaru growled, controlling his inner youkai so his eyes would not glow red. If they did, it would be a dead giveaway. "This Sesshoumaru would never do such a thing," he lied. "I was unaware merpeople did exist aside from a man's crazy fantasy."

"I see," Myouga sighed. "Now then, if that's all you wanted to know, I would very much like to be on my way—"

Of course it wasn't all he wanted to know, but Sesshoumaru wasn't about to admit this to the lowlife flea. He had learned what was most important, although he wasn't exactly thrilled about it. All he had learned was that it was his own fault for being so interested in the mermaid. He must have seen the most beautiful one in the world. As far as he was concerned, there couldn't possibly be another as cute as her.

Sesshoumaru squeezed his hand tighter around the flea, who was still jabbering away. "You will never speak of this again." His eyes darted to Jaken and Rin in the corner. "You as well. Do we understand?"

All three nodded ferociously in unison. They knew better than to defy him. "Of course, Lord Sesshoumaru," Myouga squeaked. "Now if you'll excuse me, I must get to Master Inuyasha—"

The taiyoukai said no more, but he gave a final squeeze to his wrist before dropping the flea to the ground. Myouga immediately fled, hopping to the village faster than he had been before. Sesshoumaru watched him disappear from the corner of his eye, also keenly aware of Rin pulling Jaken away to "play" to shake off the uncomfortable mood. He wasn't sure if this interrogation made him feel any better, but at least he had some answers.

And if all went well, he would get even more tonight. He couldn't wait.

...

"Inuyasha! Master Inuyasha!"

Kagome turned away from Shippou, who had his mouth full of strawberry Pocky she had brought from home. "Myouga?"

Inuyasha raised an eyebrow irritatingly. "Myouga."

The flea leapt onto Inuyasha's shoulder joyously. "Master Inuyasha! It's fantastic seeing you again." He leaned in to suck the hanyou's neck for the familiar bloody taste, but the inu-youkai wouldn't stand for it. He raised his hand and smacked his "friend", ramming him into his neck.

"Yeah, yeah, old man," Inuyasha groaned lazily. "What brings you here? Coming to warn us about some kind of danger you can't handle yourself?"

The bug youkai blushed. "How dare you accuse me of such insolence! I am only a common flea!"

"Then what are you doing here?" Miroku asked suspiciously.

"Hey, can't I just come and visit my _dear friends_ every once in a while?"

"Give me a break!" Inuyasha rolled his eyes.

"Come on, Inuyasha," Kagome sighed, although unconvinced. "I'm sure he gets bored once in a while and just wants to drop by." Her chuckle was obviously forced through clenched teeth. "Right?"

"Of course!" he scoffed. "I passed by Sango and Kirara just yesterday, and Sango said she was going home for a while. I was worried you'd be lonely, so naturally I decided to visit the rest of you, since it seems you're on a bit of a vacation—"

"So," Miroku said, "you're 'visiting' us because it's safe, and you'll be staying with us until something dangerous comes along, right?"

Myouga sweat-dropped and hesitated, hopping off Inuyasha's shoulder and onto Shippou's head. "No one trusts an old man these days," he muttered to himself.

"How can we," Kagome sighed, "with an attitude like yours?"

"What's that supposed to mean?"

Inuyasha leaned forward. "It means," he complained loudly straight in Myouga's tiny face, "that you need to become more responsible, you damn pest!"

"You're one to talk," Shippou muttered and crossed his arms.

"You wanna say that again, you lousy fur ball?"

"Osuwari!"

_Thump._

"Wench, what the fuck was that for?"

Kagome sighed. "I might as well say it now, shouldn't I? In the end, I'd have to make you eat dirt anyway. Why can't you ever leave Shippou alone, Inuyasha? He's just a child."

"Hn, he's a no-good annoying little twerp, is what he is!"

"Osuwari!"

_Bang._

"Kagome!"

"Now look what you've started, Myouga!" Shippou accused the flea atop his red hair, still chomping on his Pocky stick.

"Why's it my fault? I just came to visit!"

"Kagome, if you say that word one more time—"

"Osuwari!"

_Crash._

Miroku sighed to himself, his hand up before his nose in a peaceful position. "I need new friends."

...

Sesshoumaru paced back and forth with anticipation. It was nighttime already, but the barrier continued to refuse his entrance, and he glared into the opening. He came to the idea that perhaps the barrier would only open at a certain time every night – or not at all, but he was not satisfied with that thought – so he waited even longer to see what would happen.

He looked up at the moon the check the time. Nearly midnight. He was impatient, stopping his pacing and turning to his wards. "Come," was all he commanded them before walking away deeper into the forest.

"Lord Sesshoumaru," Rin said, leaving Jaken behind to pull Ah-Uhn along, "where are we going?"

He continued to walk away. Maybe his wards were the ones unwelcome near the barrier. To test this theory, he led them as far away as he could, an area a few miles east from the clearing, and he would head back afterwards. It was worth a try. On their journey to the second clearing, Jaken and Rin had begun to bicker as the imp scolded her for asking Sesshoumaru why they had just left after sitting there all day. Sesshoumaru glared behind him at Jaken, shutting him up and making Rin giggle and continue picking flowers.

They arrived at the next clearing a while later, Rin still with a large grin on her face, and Jaken with a scowl. Sesshoumaru paid no attention to this, his mind too focused on something – someone – else. If things worked out well with that confounded barrier, he would be able to see her again.

After that interrogation with Myouga, he continued to scold himself for thinking about the girl the way a mortal man would. He could control the evil in the Toukijin, but he couldn't control the thumping in his heart when she popped up in his head.

He couldn't help but be impatient. He wanted to see her, and he had no idea why. He wanted to watch her swimming and sighing and dancing and sitting and whatever else she could possibly do. But more than anything, he wanted to confront her.

But he couldn't do it, not last night. He was disappointed in his lack of confidence, which he was so used to having. He was nervous.

He was scared, afraid that if he confronted her, she would frown at him and tell him there was a mistake, that the barrier wasn't supposed to let _him_ in of all people. He was afraid she wouldn't be all she seemed to be, with a bad attitude or a hatred for demons.

But most of all, he was afraid she would be kind.

If she was as perfect as he imagined, it would be worse. He knew he could never stop thinking about her if she ended up to be the girl of his dreams. He imagined she was already taken, that she was in love with a merman who could give her everything she ever wanted. Or if she wasn't taken already, she would still be uninterested in Sesshoumaru, and she would apologize and say that sorry, she was waiting for a different "certain someone" to come around. And he imagined she would be kind about it all and her kindness would make it harder for him to hate her like he would want to.

It'd be impossible to forget about her then, as if his constant thoughts of her weren't annoying enough already.

He couldn't take it anymore. Even thinking negatively about her or what could possibly happen was driving him towards her. He wanted to see her again, and soon.

All his hidden emotions came bubbling to the surface at once despite his stoic appearance, and he became too anxious, throwing his Toukijin on the ground next to Ah-Uhn without bothering to give the warning he gave yesterday about not touching it. "Stay here."

Rin and Jaken stared at the back of their departing master, but they followed his orders and stayed put. Sesshoumaru looked up at the moon hastily, checking the time to see how much time had gone by.

Just past midnight, he concluded.

He bristled, unable to continue walking at his usual slow pace. This was not the moment to take his time. He narrowed his eyes in determination, breaking off into a sprint back in the direction he came from. The run seemed to calm him down enough to regain composure, and he arrived at the barrier within a few mere minutes. With his demon reflexes, he abruptly stopped running, but he was unfazed.

Staring at the space where the barrier opened up for him before, Sesshoumaru became nervous again. The barrier's aura was vibrating. Gathering all his courage together, he took a step into the clearing, entering the invisible doorway.

Again he found himself behind lush green trees. He heard a splash and rushed forward in the calmest manner he could, leaning against a tree and moving his head to the side to peek at his mermaid.

But he couldn't see her. She wasn't there.

He became frustrated. At what, he wasn't quite sure. He had hurried here to see the girl, and now she was gone. As far as he knew, someone else could have made that splash this time.

Sesshoumaru's thoughts came to a halt when he sensed movement in the corner of his eye. A picturesque girl dove from under the water, her soft hair flinging back over her head and onto her back, wet and dry all at the same time. It was the mermaid.

He lost focus on all but her. He froze when he saw her, but his insides were churning in strange ways and he felt his heart had leapt up to his throat and he couldn't swallow it back down. He had waited all day for her and again forgot about the Tetsusaiga. He did it all for her and she still didn't know he existed.

But that would all change tonight, he told himself, though he couldn't be so sure. He was still terrified of her, even more than before. She was swimming on her back, looking small and thin against the water.

Sesshoumaru dug his fingernails into his palm, determined to speak to her tonight no matter what it took. He would make sure she thought of him long after he left, and he would win her attention, even if only a little. He refused to bow before a girl he didn't even know merely because she was so pretty. He would overcome his terror and confront her, he promised he would.

But not yet, he stalled, refusing to admit that even though he swore to meet her, it was still difficult for him. So he waited even longer, drowning himself with images of her when she flapped her tail against the water.

It wasn't long before her presence inspired him enough to go up to her and start introducing himself like an idiot. He took a silent breath and sharpened his golden gaze on her, pushing himself against the tree trunk and moving to take his first step.

"My lady!"

Sesshoumaru stopped himself just in time, hiding himself again and watching a second mermaid come up from the water, making the first one jump. And what did she mean, "my lady"?

"Nayida?" He leaned in closer when he heard her voice for the first time. "Jeez, you scared me!"

Nayida smiled beautifully, but it was nothing compared to the other girl's. Not to Sesshoumaru, at least.

Nayida was gorgeous, as all mermaids were, according to Myouga. Her hair was stick straight and an orange so dazzling it was almost red. In fact, her whole body looked like she was on fire. The symbols on her skin was the same bright orange as her tail, which was sparkling with red glitter. In Sesshoumaru's opinion, she was too bright to be allowed. Even so, the brilliant colors only made the first mermaid stand out more, not the other way around. No, _his_ mermaid held a grace unlike Nayida's, and there were obvious differences between the two.

Nayida looked a year or two younger, and he didn't know if her skin was that pale naturally or if it was because of how bright the rest of her was. Her eyes had a giddy happiness behind them, but the first girl's contained a loving laughter instead. As for their markings, Sesshoumaru noticed the difference between them: Nayida's glowed like the fire in her eyes, but she only had them on her arms and neck. She lacked anything on her face and belly, unlike her friend.

"Sorry, my lady," Nayida bowed her head with a friendly formality. "But you're the one who startled me, not to mention all the others in Haven who've just noticed you came back." Sesshoumaru's brow furrowed as he moved closer, eager for more information. _Came back? Did she go somewhere?_

"Ah," the mermaid said. "Sorry, I didn't think about going down there right away."

"You didn't think about it?" Nayida chuckled. "But surely you would've remembered to come visit me and the others, and don't tell me your forgot about your father."

The raven-haired girl rolled her eyes. "Fine, I thought about it, but you should know by now how little I want to see my old man. I'm not in the mood to deal with him right now."

Nayida frowned. "But he's your _father_, and it's been ages since you last talked to him."

"Look, I'll come down to visit later, don't worry. I rarely get to come here anymore, so I want to see all of you before I leave again."

Leave? Surely she wasn't going to leave so soon, she couldn't. Sesshoumaru held back a disapproving growl. He had only just found her, and he refused to let her go so easily, even if it meant somehow convincing her to stay. But first he had to find out why she was so keen on leaving in the first place.

"Yeah," Nayida said, "okay."

"Now," the mermaid grinned, "you should get back down to Haven. You can't stay up here too long or you'll dehydrate and suffocate yourself. We can catch up later, I promise."

"I'm holding you to that." She made a face that would've been ugly had a normal person looked like that, but she was a mermaid and pretty and could somehow pull it off. "But you're right. I have to get back to my husband anyway. Newlyweds, you know?" Nayida patted the other girl's arm. "Stay safe and come down as soon as possible, got it?"

"Sure I will. Tell the others I'm alright?"

"Of course!" Nayida turned, preparing to dive back underwater. She tilted her head to smile at her friend, accompanied with a wave. "I'll see you later." And without even waiting for a response, the cheerful girl leapt back into the lake, her bright tail flapping in the air with the movement. The original mermaid stayed above the water, waving her hand at the spot Nayida had disappeared into, saying nothing more.

Sesshoumaru, now alone with the mermaid again, exhaled deeply. His eavesdropping had taught him quite a bit about her, even if he didn't understand it all. For one, she had to have some high ranking in their society, since Nayida had addressed her formally; second, she lived in a place called Haven, which was undoubtably underwater; third, she didn't get along with her father; fourth, she was somehow able to stay above water for a long time although Nayida couldn't; and fifth, this mermaid had just about the most desirable voice he had ever heard in his life.

He was more intrigued than before. She hadn't done anything particularly amazing, but he wanted her twice as much as before. He was so awestruck by her, he didn't notice until it was too late that he had stepped out from behind the tree trunk to stare longingly at her.

The mermaid heard a noise and sensed something had moved behind her, and she looked up only to cry out in surprise.

Her warm blue eyes met his cold golden ones, and all was silent.

...

Disclaimer: Borrowed "Haven" from _Serenity_. I love Joss Whedon. And Adam Baldwin. Who I've met. And who's called me gorgeous.

A/N: Revised. The chapter was originally 12 pages, but I narrowed it down to 8. I hate wordy stories. And FYI, I took out all honorary suffixes, aside from "taichou." I can't stand dubbed episodes or overly-translated manga (I think the Japanese language is beautiful), but because I rarely see any suffixes being used in other IY fanfiction, I decided to set it all aside for this particular story. Ah well!


	3. perfection

...

**the mermaid  
**by mystical spirits

**[perfection]**

"_Here at last was the imagined but never fully realized place leaping into real life."  
_—_from William Golding's_ Lord of the Flies—

...

Sesshoumaru was directly in front of her. Lord Sesshoumaru. _Just perfect._

Needless to say, Kagome was at loss for words, her mouth falling open in surprise. She knew there was a demonic presence nearby, but him? He shouldn't have been able to get through the barrier, especially because he was the most dangerous youkai around now that Naraku had kicked the bucket, but for some reason he was still standing _right there_.

Of all the demons, it had to be him. It just had to be one of Inuyasha's biggest rivals and greatest enemies. Sesshoumaru was a strong demon, so strong she couldn't purify him much if he were to attack her. She was able to wound demons and drive them away, especially when she had arrows with her, but her miko abilities weren't very powerful and she didn't know much about them. Against Sesshoumaru, she would definitely lose.

She mentally groaned. There was no doubt in her mind that he recognized her, and it was only a matter of time before he blabbed to Inuyasha about her being a mermaid.

But he wasn't moving. He was standing just as still as she was, staring at her strangely. She didn't understand. He wasn't smirking at her or attacking her or threatening her in any way, and it made no sense. He wasn't even walking away, like he would usually do when he was uninterested. He was just…standing there.

She unconsciously stared back into his shining golden eyes, frozen in surprise. Sesshoumaru was in shock himself. He couldn't believe he had been so stupid as to reveal his hiding spot like that. He had wanted to approach the girl that night, but his usually calm mind spun so far into an emotional overdrive that he practically jumped out at her without even thinking.

As if the shock and embarrassment (which he refused to admit he felt) wasn't enough, those damned hormones of his had to come out right at this moment. As soon as their eyes met, hers wide and his lazy and emotionless as always, Sesshoumaru's breath caught in his throat. He had seen her eyes from farther away, just a glance of them, but now they seemed even more breathtaking than before.

And those were just her eyes. He couldn't help but notice how innocent she looked, her wrists clasped together against her chest in surprise and her position awkward. A light breeze blew her hair into her face, but she hurriedly pushed it away without breaking their eye contact. The dark water was so black it hid her fin, but it wasn't deep enough to cover the navy curves on her belly. Just looking at them made Sesshoumaru want to tremble with excitement.

He stopped himself quickly. He didn't want to have thoughts like the ones currently bothering him, especially not in front of her.

Instead he continued to stare, all thoughts now gone from his mind, including his nervousness and his desire to speak to her. But he did want to say something. It was too bad he forgot how to talk. Just watching her, he didn't have a clue what to do. He didn't know how to move, how to _breathe_.

Luckily, she saved him from having to worry. "What are you doing here?"

At first, Sesshoumaru ignored the tingling in his spine when he realized she was actually talking to him and only him. Then he remembered he was supposed to answer her.

Why _was_ he here? It was obvious to him, but he hadn't a clue how to put it into words. _I wanted to see you again_, was his first thought, but she wasn't supposed to know he was spying on her the night before. _I wanted to speak to you_, he almost said, but then it came to him that he couldn't even open his mouth.

He was immediately filled with embarrassment he had never felt before, and he hated it, knowing this girl controlled him more than he controlled himself. Although his uncharacteristic shyness didn't show, since he had mastered the technique of hiding emotions, he felt as though the mermaid's gaze bore into him so deeply, she knew just how vulnerable he felt.

_I am acting ridiculous_, he realized, but it didn't stop him from feeling embarrassed, and he turned to walk away and back through the barrier.

Her voice stopped him in his tracks. "Wait, don't go!"

Kagome didn't know why she did it, at least not right away. She wanted him to leave her alone, but it would be a problem if he did. She had a tail, meaning she couldn't do anything if he had sniffed out Inuyasha, woke him up, and gave her identity away. She would be helpless.

Despite the uneasy thoughts drifting in Kagome's head, Sesshoumaru's heart thudded in his chest. Surely this was all a dream, a never-ending dream he happened to be drowning in. His stomach was so filled with butterflies, it almost tickled. He was _invited to stay with her_, just like he wanted. He turned to her slowly, as though she would suddenly disappear if he moved too quickly. He didn't know what to say, only staring again in that way Kagome couldn't understand.

"Uh," she mumbled, knowing he could still hear her, "would you stay…please?" She swam until she was right in front of the cliff, and she impulsively held her hand out, palm up, needing reassurance that he wouldn't leave and wake Inuyasha up. After a second of letting her hand hang in midair, she realized how stupid she was being.

_What am I doing?_ she thought. _This is _Sesshoumaru_. He'd rather die than touch a human like _me_._

She began to move her hand back to the grass where her other hand was, but then she noticed a certain glint in the dog-demon's eyes. To tell the truth, it made her uncomfortable. Maybe she was reading it wrong, but with the way they were fixed on her outstretched palm made it seem like he didn't want her to pull away, but she didn't know why. She never did understand Inuyasha, and hell if she understood his brother either.

Sesshoumaru kept staring at her offered hand. He couldn't believe a mermaid, let alone this one, would actually want to _speak_ to him, to have him stay with her so they could _sit_ together.

Hesitant at the sudden friendliness he had never received before, he slowly put one foot in front of the other, gliding towards the mermaid. He paused at the edge of the plateau, where she was floating above the water and holding out her hand, although she looked a little awkward doing so. He knelt down, balancing on one knee. His breathing had completely stopped by this point, their close proximity beginning to affect him. With a straight face, he placed his clawed hand above her soft, small one, holding it just sweetly enough so she wouldn't notice.

He gulped at her warm skin brushed against his own, cold and silky. Unlike what he expected, her skin didn't feel wet at all, but then again, it wasn't dry either. It was a texture he had never felt before. Holding back a schoolboy blush, he mentally yelled at himself for acting and feeling so emotional. He hated the way just holding her hand made his blood rush.

He looked up from their grip on each other to look at her face close-up for the first time. He was surprised when he did. He wasn't prepared for just how close they really were, a mere two feet separating them. He lost himself in her stunned gaze.

If he thought she was gorgeous before, he was mistaken. She was, without a doubt, the most breathtaking creature he had ever seen in his long life. Her skin was the color of flushed ivory, the smoothness igniting a hidden desire in him to caress her cheek, and her mouth was pink and pouting and looked perfect enough to taste—

"Why are you here?" she said forcefully, beginning to panic, though he didn't notice.

He was suddenly very thankful for her voice, which had brought him out of his reverie. Had she waited any longer, he might have swooped down and kissed her, and that definitely wouldn't be a good first impression. He didn't know what was coming over him, but somehow this mermaid was making him too fidgety and excited for his own good. And fuck, he didn't even know her name.

He didn't know how he was able to do it, but he found his voice and was able to answer her. "I do not know."

Kagome was speechless. Sesshoumaru was acting strange, _different._ Maybe he was ill. He wasn't trying to hurt her, he had taken her hand and wasn't letting go, and he was acting indifferent to her, or so she thought. But maybe it was a blessing in disguise. If he was acting this way, it would probably be easier for her to persuade him in keeping her secret. Although…was it just her, or was his voice a little rougher than usual?

She tilted her head a little, and Sesshoumaru snuck a peek at the arch of her neck. There was a pause as the two just watched each other, but again Kagome broke the silence, nearly stuttering.

"Um, Sesshoumaru…"

She didn't know exactly how to say what she wanted to, but she knew she still had to ask. She didn't need to worry about it, though, because Sesshoumaru himself was unaware of what was going on.

Unwanted shivers threatened to travel up his spine when he heard her say his name, but he was still confused.

"How do you know my name, when I have not yet learned yours?" He wanted to hit himself for actually saying his thoughts aloud, but he was in his right mind enough to keep his stoic expression opposed to a surprised one.

Kagome was stunned herself. _He doesn't know who I am! _she thought to herself happily. She was positive he knew the name of "Inuyasha's wench" since her friends had always called it out in front of him countless times, so that must've meant that he actually _didn't recognize her_.

Someone up there had to be watching over her, she knew it.

"You…" she started, tugging a little at her hand even though he didn't give any sign of letting go, "you want to know my name?"

He was drowning in her eyes. "Of course," he said simply.

Kagome could barely find the words to reply, staring up at the taiyoukai. She wanted to be mistaken, but she knew she couldn't be. She definitely heard the way his voice sounded when he said those otherwise casual two words. It sounded like he was _flirting _with her. It didn't help that he had moved closer when he spoke, or that his eyelids drooped handsomely, or that his grip on her hand faintly tightened. She began to smile in a way that, if it was anyone but her, could have been called egotistical. She blushed cutely, the pink spreading to her cheeks and nose. As far as she was concerned, she was only a seventeen-year-old girl and it was nice feeling flattered, especially by the infamous ice cube Sesshoumaru, and it was because of her undeniably teenaged nature that she decided to continue his game. It couldn't hurt, she thought, because he didn't know who she really was anyway.

Sesshoumaru could barely breathe when he saw her grin. She wasn't just smiling, she was smiling at _him_.

"Sorry," she said, flashing a playful smirk. "I can't tell you."

Sesshoumaru was still. "Yet I have asked to hear it."

"Wait, you didn't let me finish. I can't tell you my real name because it's a secret." She smiled again and honestly hoped she was flirting well enough. She wasn't exactly used to it. Eri had always told her to "pose a challenge" when talking to a guy so they would stay interested, so hopefully this counted. "But I have a nickname the others like to call me, if you want to hear that instead."

He hesitated. He wanted to know her real name more than anything, but he supposed it would be a good enough compromise, so he nodded in response.

Kagome smiled, pulling him down by his hand, since he wasn't exactly letting her go anyway, so he could whisper it into his pointed ear. After all, if he could flirt with her, surely she could flirt back. She nearly laughed aloud at her devious thoughts. She was never one of those girls who flaunted themselves around at school, and she wasn't the type of person who played with a guy's heart, but she couldn't resist the chance to make the taiyoukai of the west grovel at her feet. She half-forgot the real reason she asked Sesshoumaru to stay with her as she wallowed in her mischievous plotting, but she shrugged it off. She guessed her desire to act seductive and manipulative was coming into place because she was a mermaid, since it was not uncommon for the females to act this way.

"My name," she muttered, unable to stop smiling, "is Hanabi."

Sesshoumaru held back a shudder as her name brushed against the sensitive parts of his ear. He let his eyes flutter shut, which was acceptable because she couldn't see his face at the time anyway, but once she pulled back, they snapped open, her hand still in his.

"Hanabi," he said, trying out her name. He felt sinful saying it, like he was too unworthy to have that privilege. It never occurred to Sesshoumaru that he thought himself undeserving for the first time in his life. "'Fire-flower'?" he guessed at the meaning of her name.

"That's right," she said, "like the fireworks." Her smile widened. "But yours, I think, is 'killing perfection', right? Or is it 'killing blade' or 'destroyer of life' or something equally as deadly? I can't ever really be sure."

He refused to smile back at her, no matter how much he wanted to. "Perhaps all of them?"

"Well, all three would suit you, wouldn't they?"

Sesshoumaru looked down at the grass, noting the colorful flowers dotting the field. He saw, particularly, a few stray flowers of no particular kind, a bright and healthy red in color. He released the mermaid's hand (_finally_, Kagome thought), but only because he just had one arm, and he leaned over to pluck the flower from its stem. He cradled the blossom with his clawed fingers, raising it to the mermaid's ear and moving closer.

"Perhaps," he said, "but our names certainly hold their true meanings, 'fire-flower.'" He let his claws run through her silky hair when he brought his hand down.

Kagome held her breath, her eyes a lot wider than they were before. She didn't understand why, but she actually didn't mind the way his fingers felt in her hair. His touch was so soft, she couldn't get over it and realize just how affectionate it was too. She was sort of upset. _She_ was the mermaid, and it was _her_ idea to charm the demon, not the other way around.

She smiled despite herself, mostly because a guy had actually put a flower in her hair like in all those cheesy romance movies she'd watched over the years. She didn't know what to say, touched at Sesshoumaru's gentleness, which she naturally never expected from him, of all people.

Sesshoumaru had nothing to say either, so he instead gave her what he could: he smiled.

It wasn't a large one, nor was it evil, but it was a true smile, barely noticeable because he wasn't used to such things. But it was still there, and Kagome's eyes twinkled, pleased at what she had been able to bring out of him. Now that she looked at it, she realized Sesshoumaru had a very dashing smile.

They sat there for quite a while, staring at each other for different reasons. They were so absorbed in the task at hand, time seemed to stop, though neither of them knew why it felt that way. Time passed quickly, and by the time Kagome pulled away to look at the moon, they realized just how long they had been gawking at each other. Sesshoumaru had still been caressing the tips of her hair, but he immediately pulled back when he came to.

He cleared his throat and made sure he wasn't blushing before looking away. He didn't regret his forwardness, but he was afraid of the rejection "Hanabi" was sure to give him. Fortunately for him, Kagome was fighting a blush of her own, so she didn't notice his anxiety. She hated awkward moments.

"So, Sesshoumaru," she blurted, avoiding what had just happened, "how are your companions?"

He looked up at her, stunned. "My companions?"

"Yeah," she nodded, "your wards. The youkai, the dragon, and that little girl."

"You know of them?" he raised an eyebrow. "If I remember correctly, you knew my name as well, but I am quite certain this is the first time we have met."

Kagome was laughing uneasily on the inside, realizing her mistake. _Oh yeah,_ she thought, _this is "the first time we've met." Whoops. _"Um, I'm a mermaid, aren't I? We just…know things sometimes," she lied. She smiled nervously, but it seemed to relax the taiyoukai a little. "Now, uh, tell me about your wards, or do I have to ask you again?"

Sesshoumaru nearly chuckled, assuming she was just innocently eager. "There is not much to tell," he admitted. He was so used to his wards by now, he couldn't find much to say about them.

"Well, then," she said slowly, nibbling at her lower lip to calm herself down, "what about Rin…the human girl, that is. How old is she?"

Sesshoumaru gulped before answering, pushing away the sudden burst of desire he felt wash over him when she attended to her mouth the way he wanted to do himself. "Nine years of age, I believe."

"Where is she right now?"

"She stays with Jaken and Ah-Uhn not far off," he admitted. _And probably harassing Jaken as well, _he thought, _jumping on him, annoying him, shoving that stone she found this morning into his face—_

The stone. Sesshoumaru couldn't believe he had forgotten about the stone that reminded him so much of Hanabi. "Rin found something today," he veered off topic. "A painted stone with a hole in the middle. It looks just like this." He ran his claw over the navy star-shaped marking hiding behind her bangs.

_Okay, this is a little weird, _she thought when he practically stroked her forehead, but soon she processed what he said. "A stone?"

"Yes."

"Ohhh!" She blinked, thinking aloud. "I was wondering where I'd lost it…" She immediately looked up at him, eyes wide, aware of how greedy she sounded.

"It belongs to you?" he asked, his voice still emotionless so Kagome couldn't tell if he was upset with her or not.

"Well," she muttered, "yeah, but Rin could have it if she wants. I don't mind." She was a little wary of giving it away, but once she remembered the little girl's adorable smiling face, she realized she really _didn't_ mind that much. She never really used the rock in the first place, so it wouldn't be _too_ missed. "My mom gave it to me ages ago. She had my dad's most skilled artists make it for me so I could always remember where I came from, no matter where I was." She stopped, almost slapping her hand to cover her mouth, but that would be a dead giveaway, even more so than her just practically telling _Sesshoumaru_ she was part human. He couldn't find out who she was, not if she wanted to keep her secret from Inuyasha and the others. "Uh, yeah, but if Rin likes it so much, she's welcome to have it. Just call it a gift."

Sesshoumaru was stunned speechless yet again. From the way it sounded, the stone was important to her. He couldn't understand why she was so willing to give it to Rin, a girl she had never met before – or so he believed. He voiced his thoughts, asking "Hanabi" for an explanation.

"Well, I was really happy when I got it," she said. "Just the thought of something that pretty made me excited. So maybe Rin could keep it, since she was probably just as happy when she found it. I couldn't ask for it back. That'd just be selfish. I've had my turn with it, so now it's time to share."

The taiyoukai couldn't help but smile, however slight it was. This mermaid was so kind-hearted, unlike he was. Her care for others, especially Rin, made him feel a bit like he was floating without his youkai cloud.

"Uh, but could you make sure she doesn't lose it?" she laughed. "I've already lost it once. I don't think it can handle more mistreatment."

"I shall be sure she keeps it safe," he nodded once.

"Alright, well, I'm trusting you," she grinned, missing the look that jumped into Sesshoumaru's eyes. She didn't realize what she said until a few seconds later, and she wondered why she was able to say it so naturally like that.

Suddenly, she felt a surge of power pulse through her body. Sesshoumaru obviously didn't notice, but she recognized the feeling. This pulse only vibrated when one merperson wanted to contact another, and currently a mermaid – Nayida, based on the aura Kagome sensed – wanted to speak with her.

She turned her head behind her to look at the water in the lake, unable to spot any red or orange that would show where Nayida was. "Sorry," she said, turning back around to Sesshoumaru's curious gaze, "but I have to go."

His head jerked up in surprise, and he pushed down the urge to tell her not to leave him. He had barely spent any time with her, and he wasn't ready to separate so early. For the past two nights, he wanted to speak to her, and now she had to leave. He should have known, though, since everything good had to come to an end. But he didn't want her to go away. He wanted to stay with her forever, but there she was, saying she couldn't.

"Why so suddenly?" he said instead.

"Someone's summoning me," she replied. "I know you probably don't believe me, but it's this instinct we get. It's hard to explain."

He looked away so she wouldn't see his disappointment. "I understand," he said, "but I would like to ask you…" He looked up at her, realizing he was still kneeling on the edge of this cliff even though he didn't notice the tiny pricks of pain in his frozen joints.

"Yeah?" she asked patiently.

He wasn't used to feeling nervous, like he felt now. He was afraid again, afraid of her answer, but he swallowed his fear. "May I return tomorrow?" he asked.

She was floored. She didn't expect any of this from Sesshoumaru, Inuyasha's brother and enemy. He was just a bundle of surprises. Regaining composure, she nodded, knowing that the more time she spent with him, flirting with him at the same time, the easier it would be to make sure her secret would be safe. "Sure, I guess so!" she laughed.

He relaxed drastically and unnoticeably. He assumed it meant she wanted to see him again, and his insides fluttered against each other at the thought. "Tomorrow, then?"

She nodded, not realizing the close proximity of their faces, although he certainly did and tried not to blush. "I'll see you later."

Another pulse reverberated in the air around her, so Kagome quickly touched the flower in her hair, magic pouring through her fingertips to make sure it would stay behind her ear temporarily. She didn't know why, but she didn't want to lose the gift at all, even if it was Sesshoumaru who had given it to her. She guessed she wanted to keep it just because it was a reminder of how easily she had been able to make him flirt with her earlier.

Feeling the need to repay him for it, though, she spoke to him as an idea came to her. "Stay here for a second, okay?" At his nod, she dove underneath the water's surface, able to breathe easily even without visible gills. Reaching the seafloor, she felt around underneath a niche in the cliff. Feeling a familiar texture, she pried off a small, glittering item and smiled at it.

Another pulse attacked Kagome, a more urgent one, and she hurriedly shot up to the surface and saw Sesshoumaru in the same position, watching her with a look she didn't have time to think about.

"Here," she blurted, holding out her empty palm to grab onto Sesshoumaru's. With her other hand, she dumped the gift into his before releasing her grip. "I've got to go now," she said, her hand resting on his forearm, unaware of the tingles Sesshoumaru felt because of it.

She didn't know what came over her. It was probably because she was too happy at how much control she had over him, and it was probably because she was in such a rush, she couldn't think straight, but she found herself rising from the water a little and kissing Sesshoumaru's cheek – just a peck, really – before diving back into the lake and swimming away.

Sesshoumaru watched her disappear, frozen solid.

He could still feel her soft mouth pressed against his skin, which was now numb. He raised his hand to hold the spot she kissed, but he remembered he was currently holding something else, something "Hanabi" had given him.

Looking down at his closed fist, he slowly unwrapped his fingers. As soon as he saw his present, his eyes widened. In his hand was a blooming lily, blood red in color and absolutely perfect. But there was something different about this particular blossom:

It was glass.

But it was still a real flower, living until it was picked. Its texture was smooth and unreal, and Sesshoumaru was in awe. Staring openly at it, he remembered the flower he gave Hanabi, red because it was a "fire-flower" like her name said she was. Now, two different words flooded his mind, the two words _his_ name meant:

_Killing perfection_.

...

Kagome swam quickly, deeper and deeper into the clear-colored lake. She always liked to marvel at the magic around her, especially how it made the lake look so shallow from above, even though there was practically a whole city below it.

A flash of red and orange finally caught Kagome's eye, and she swam closer to her friend.

"Nayida!" she called out. "What is it? Is something wrong?" She stopped swimming when she almost flew right into the girl, the pulse in her fin now completely gone.

"Well," Nayida fidgeted nervously, "I guess it depends."

Kagome frowned. "What do you mean?"

"Hanabi," she whispered, "your father wants to see you."

...

A/N: Revised, got rid of about 500 words because I'm awesome. And listen up, this is very important: **I have changed Kohana's name to Hanabi**. Sorry for such a drastic change, but I really don't like "Kohana". I think I just chose the name because it was on a baby name website. I got "Hanabi" from Happy Hustle High aka H3 School (not Naruto, like everyone seems to think) because she is the cutest anime girl I've ever seen in my life. Let me know if you want to read it and I'll hook you up with a link because it's hard to find. Highly recommended for any shoujo lover!


	4. mirror

...

**the mermaid  
**by mystical spirits

**[mirror]  
**

"_Once the game is over, the king and the pawn go back in the same box."_

...

Nayida led the way to the king's underwater castle, where Kagome's father also lived, being an important and well-known officer to the king himself. She swam twice as quickly as Kagome, who was sulking and letting herself trail farther and farther behind her friend the closer they got.

Kagome sighed in annoyance, the water brushing against the red flower still behind her ear. She was hoping to put this familiar meeting with her dad off. Every meeting between them was the same, from start to finish, especially when the argument started to get a little more personal than it was supposed to be. She couldn't stand visiting him anymore because of it.

It wasn't that she didn't love her father, because she did, but she felt the feeling was _not_ mutual, no matter what he said. Like Inuyasha, every time her father looked at her, he saw someone else. But she _wasn't_ someone else. She was just herself, Kagome, also known as Hanabi. It was a shame no one seemed to notice that.

Looking up from her pout, she noticed how close the castle had gotten, and Nayida was far ahead.

She sighed. Her father might've been a fool, but that was no reason to take it out on Nayida, who had always been so understanding. There was no excuse to be so rude and purposely distant to her friend. That being said, Kagome sped up her pace, finally catching up to the girl right in front of the castle entrance.

At the sight of her, the two guards by the large doors (only two were necessary, since there weren't many trespassers down there) couldn't contain their surprise at the return of the daughter of the infamous Kyuzou-taichou. Everyone knew she was part human, and although Nayida had warned them ahead of time, the guards still didn't expect to see her so soon. It was no secret that Captain Kyuzou and Kagome had a very rocky relationship.

"Ah," cried one guard, "Lady Hanabi!"

"Good to see you returning safely," the other merman smiled through his yellow mustache. Like everyone else, he knew she was the guardian of the Shikon no Tama when on land, and that was obviously a very dangerous role.

Kagome smiled at them. Although she liked to avoid visiting her father, her friends and casual acquaintances in Haven were all pleasant merfolk to be around, and she was really rather fond of each of them, even the mermen, despite their ugliness and bearded chins. "Arigatou," she said, "and it's good to see you guys again too."

"Here to see the captain, Lady Hanabi?" the first guard asked politely, his aquamarine fin flapping.

"Yeah," she muttered unhappily, her smile obviously fake. She didn't want to worry them, especially because everything was between her and her dad and no one else.

"Hey," the second, younger merman said, "don't look so down. It'll be fine." Somehow Kagome knew he was lying. "Now, Lady Hanabi—" he bowed his head in casual respect, "Nayida."

The mermen turned and pointed their underwater spears to the castle gates in unison, preparing to open them. Immediately, colorful sparkles emerged from the head of the arrowed blades, each clustering around one of the two doors. The glitter somehow pushed them back, and because they were made of fine ivory, the water pressure did not make them hard to open. Kagome watched, not feeling very excited even though it was really a very pretty thing to look at, and instead she felt a hollowness in her stomach. Her mouth was pressed into a straight line by now, and she mentally groaned. She barely heard Nayida thanking the guards, already swimming in the usual direction to get to her father's personal quarters. She didn't stick around to sightsee and ogle the elaborate castle. She just wanted to get the rendezvous over and done with, so she increased her speed and left Nayida trailing behind her.

Getting closer to her father, she swam past beautiful stone corridors and carefully painted pictures on the walls, swallowing the giant lump in her throat.

There were two more guards blocking the pathway to the captain's room, and although they seemed glad to see Kagome again, they were stricter and gruffer, and they knew why she was here. Without a word, they let her in. Nayida understood the tense silence, and she stayed behind, not far from the burly mermen.

Kagome hastily shut the smaller double doors behind her, aware of her father's stare burning into her back even though she avoided his eyes. Once the doors were shut, she paused, not wanting to turn to look at him.

"Hanabi!"

Blinking, Kagome slowly turned to face him, sitting at his desk on the other end of the large room, his fin floating above the cobblestone floor. His graying beard was still long, like his hair, and he had taken off his army coat to sport a casual appearance. His fin easily matched her own, and their sparkling blue eyes were exactly the same.

But despite the similarities between them, Kagome couldn't help but give his kind eyes a hard look back. She knew why he called for her. He might have just made it seem like he missed her, but she knew better. Though, she had to admit she _did_ miss her dad a little, since she rarely saw him, but she was still wary about meeting him.

"Dad," she swam closer, sitting on the stone floor in front of him, as was custom.

The captain, a smart and strong merman named Kyuzou, smiled sadly. "Well, this is awkward, isn't it?" he chuckled.

She offered a tiny smile back, but her heart wasn't all there. _He gets straight to the point, doesn't he? _"Yeah." The silence hung in the air for many seconds after her short answer, but it was a familiar conversation so it was expected. As always, she spoke first. "You wanted to see me?"

"Of course," he answered. "I've missed you."

"Did you?" she muttered loud enough. Their voices were soft and quiet, but below the surface they were hard and stressed. Kagome disliked these meetings, Kyuzou knew, but he couldn't help but say what he usually did, even with knowing how badly it would end.

"I did." He cleared his throat at the tension. "You didn't come yesterday, but I heard you were spotted here last night. Maybe you didn't miss _me_?"

"I didn't say that, Father," she answered truthfully.

"But you didn't wish to see me."

"No, I didn't."

"May I inquire as to why?"

Kagome's eyes hardened. "I'm not very good with confrontation."

"…I see." There was a pause in the air. "Tell me about your friends on land. I assume they're well?"

Kagome had to refrain from rolling her eyes. How many times had she heard that question? "Yes. Inuyasha is a lot more patient, Sango and Miroku's relationship is steady, Shippou's growing up, and Kirara is as strong as ever. Naraku's gone now, and the jewel is coming together again with the more shards we find."

Kyuzou nodded, smiling softly. "You have accomplished much."

"I guess."

"You speak vaguely, though."

"Gomen nasai."

Kyuzou sighed. The conversation, as always, was going nowhere. If that was the case, he assumed it was time to ask now. "Hanabi…" he trailed off, and Kagome stifled a groan. Here it was, the reason why she had to make visit after visit down to this castle. "How is your mother?"

She looked away, down to the floor. She hated this. He would always ask about her mom, and it would all go downhill from there. "She's doing well."

Kyuzou didn't speak, waiting for more information that he would not get until he asked. "And her family?"

"Fine. They're fine." She began brushing her hair with her fingers, a common habit she shared with other mermaids. "Souta's getting smarter and smarter every day, but he's still always playing around and being silly." She ignored the glimpse of pain in her father's eyes. She was usually so kind-hearted, but she couldn't help but enjoy hurting him by mentioning how good of a life her mom was leading now. And the thought of her mother with another man and reproducing into the annoying little kid brother called Souta, well, she knew it was killing him inside. "Gramps still loves his stories, and he's always blabbing them to the shrine's visitors. Our cat Buyou is really old now, but he's still cuddly and likes to eat the presents Gramps gets me. The whole family's doing well."

"I'm…glad," Kyuzou nodded, and he hesitated. "And your mother, what's she up to?"

Kagome couldn't hold back her glare. It was not in her nature to act so cruelly – and to her old father, of all people – but he frustrated her quickly and, like every teenager, she couldn't help herself. She sighed. These questions were just leading to another disaster. "She works now and then, a part-time job. She stays at home most of the time, though. You know, chores and cooking and shrine work, things like that."

When Kyuzou nodded with sparkling eyes, Kagome grew even angrier. She was always so jealous of the attention he paid to her mother, but not to her. "She is healthy then?"

"Yeah," she growled, exhausted.

"And…" he hesitated the most at this point, "does she ever speak of me?"

She pushed herself off the floor and swam to an open window, looking at but not really seeing the gorgeous view of the water. "At times." She didn't lie. But then again, he shouldn't have expected her to completely forget the man, the _merman_, she first fell in love with.

"I do miss her."

Kagome's eyes softened, knowing very clearly the story of her parents' forced separation. That Bone-Eater's Well was a really troublesome nuisance. It wasn't his fault things had turned out the way they did, but the least he could do was acknowledge her, Kagome, his _daughter_. At this frustrating thought, the softness in her eyes evolved into anger. The unsettling feeling in her stomach was too much, and the hidden fury inside her leaked out of her mouth in biting words.

"Do you?" she glared out the window before whipping her head towards her father. "And why's that? After all, she's _right here_."

"Hanabi," he sighed, "don't do this—"

"And why not?" she glowered. "I mean, I really resemble her a lot, right?"

"That means nothing—"

"Oh yeah? You told me yourself I remind you of her. I don't even see why you keep me around. I mean, the thought of her only brings you pain."

"Do not speak to me like that!" Kyuzou stood to float above his fin, using his captain voice, the loud and frightening one that demanded control. He had so much to say, but as always, he couldn't find out how to put it into words, not around his daughter. He vaguely heard himself blurting out foolish words about respect, which wasn't even what the fight was about, not exactly. "I am your father, and you have no right to defy me!"

Kagome scoffed. "You may be my father, but you don't treat me like your daughter. I'm just here as a living picture of Mom so you don't forget what she looks like."

"You're wrong," he denied. "Yes, you're my daughter and I love you—"

"Bullshit! If you love me, it's because you're obligated to as a father, not because you actually care about me. You only enjoy my presence when I don't speak and just show up as my mother."

"Hanabi!"

"_Kagome_. My name is Kagome, not fucking Hanabi!" She was beyond frustrated, her cries surely loud enough for Nayida and the guards outside to overhear.

"It's your rightful name as a mermaid."

"And what about my name as a human?"

"You are half-mermaid, and I have a right to call you by that name!"

Kagome took a deep breath. If she continued to raise her voice any higher, she was sure to be hoarse in the morning. "You don't call me Kagome because Mom gave me that name."

Kyuzou paused, sighing tiredly. Kagome never noticed just how very old he looked. "Maybe so." He spoke softly, exhausted. Such softness made Kagome calm down, even though she didn't want to and she was still angry beyond belief.

She seethed, despite her heart's pace slowing back down. "You admit to it then."

"I suppose," he sighed, rubbing his brow. "It would mean a lot to me if you would at least understand how I feel. I haven't forgotten her."

Kagome turned her head to look back out the window. Their fight was short as always, but it still made her heart feel like lead. She hated how her father would make her feel so guilty when it was all _his_ fault for not loving her like he was supposed to. He only cared about her mother, her dear mother.

"I do understand," she muttered. "I just wish you could move on."

Kyuzou stared at the back of her head. "As if I could."

Kagome's anger began to inflate again, but she tried to keep it under control as best as she could. "_She_ has moved on." Her father's pain was so obvious, almost to the point where she could reach out and feel it with her fingers. "I'm not saying she's forgotten, but she knows you won't ever see each other again, whether you accept it or not. She lives in the future now, and you live here underwater. The other man she married and loved is gone now, and only Souta's left. She had a son now, and you…" She turned to him and gave him the saddest expression she could muster. "You have a daughter."

The eye contact was held for many seconds that seemed to last for hours, the pair of the captain's hurt and guilty eyes reflecting off of his daughter's sad and angry ones. Kagome tore away first, looking back out the window at Haven's peaceful scenery and the happy merfolk she wished she could be a part of.

"I know you can't forget, Dad," she continued, "but what about me? Am I not good enough for you? You use my resemblance of Mom, but you hate how I remind you of her. I don't even know what you want anymore."

She swam back towards the ivory door she came through to enter. She held the elaborate handle, ready to open it.

"It was nice speaking to you again, Dad," she lied. "I hope our next meeting will be different. This conversation is much too familiar." And with that, she left the captain's quarters, leaving Kyuzou alone once again, alone like he was used to.

They both knew how quick of a conversation it was, but it was such an overused routine, it needed less time for every feeling to be thrown into the water. Kyuzou, like always, felt the guilt eat away at him, physically affected by every hurtful accusation made, but he knew these thoughts would soon pass as they always had. Still, every one of those meetings piled on top of each other, the emotions being stores away in the back of his heart, and he felt that pile would soon collapse.

He did feel ashamed. He always wished he could act as the father Hanabi – Kagome – deserved, but every time he looked at her, he thought of the woman he loved. Unfortunately, every word his daughter spoke was true. But he couldn't help the lack of a bond he had with her, and he didn't know how to fix it either. He shook his head, swimming to the same window Kagome had stared out of. They hadn't even seen each other for ten minutes, even with all the awkward pauses.

His line of sight was immediately drawn to his daughter sprinting in the water, her swimming a lot quicker than normal as she rose to the surface again.

Everyone knew she preferred the air over the water, even when she was a mermaid. Everyone knew she went up there because she was the only one in Haven who could stand the oxygen exposure that long. Everyone knew she liked being by herself instead of with her merfolk friends, even though it was so beautiful underwater. And somehow, Kyuzou felt her solitude was foreshadowing her final choice, the choice she was going to have to make when the time came.

...

Inuyasha sighed loudly, carrying a sack of rice over his shoulder to Kaede's hut. He felt like being lazy today, but like always, Kaede found something for him to do. And by something, she meant work. It was a good thing he had demon blood running through his veins because to him, the bag wasn't heavy at all.

Within moments of walking through the village, Inuyasha found himself outside of Kaede's hut, and he dumped the sack by the door without a care. It wasn't like the rice was going to break or anything.

"Here, Kaede," his dog ears twitched at the familiar voice, "I got rid of those weeds for you."

"Ah, arigatou, Kagome," the older miko said in her rough accent. "They shall be good for new medicines."

Inuyasha turned the corner to Kaede's fields, bringing himself into the conversation as usual. "Since when do you use weeds for medicine? That sounds a little fishy to me."

Kaede turned to the hanyou. "Oh, are you finished unloading those sacks already?" The look he gave her pretty much answered her question. "Weeds grown next to herbs pick up some of their healing powers, and it creates one of their own. It is only natural to use it in medicine."

He scoffed. "Whatever, it doesn't matter to me."

"You're the one who asked, Inuyasha," Kagome pointed out.

"Yeah, well, I didn't ask _you_."

She rolled her eyes. "No, but you butted into our conversation, stupid."

"Some conversation, talking about weeds."

"We wouldn't have talked about it for so long if you didn't show up and ask about it."

"Then what're you so testy about? Apparently I didn't interrupt a very _important _conversation after all."

Her eyes narrowed playfully. She loved these short and pointless banters with Inuyasha, and she knew he did too. At times their fights were real and hurtful, but these were harmless contests of their wits, and they both welcomed these as a chance to get closer, to spend time with each other. Inuyasha was probably the most important person in the world to her, and she was the most important to him. Even if no one understood the way their relationship worked, she knew she would always love every single minute she spent with Inuyasha.

She opened her mouth to retort, but was interrupted. "Inuyasha!" Miroku groaned from a few yards away. He was dragging an extremely large and heavy bag of rice on his shoulder, making him slump over and hunch his back, and he gave up and threw it on the ground to drag it that way instead.

"What the hell d'ya think you're doing, Miroku?" Inuyasha stared down at him obliviously.

The monk glared, panting from exhaustion. "What does it look like I am doing? I am dragging these heavy bags all the way across the village because a certain lazy dog decided to carry the smallest and lightest ones instead and leave me with these."

Kaede glanced at Inuyasha apprehensively while Kagome ran to help Miroku with the last sack. Inuyasha ignored both. "Who ya calling a lazy dog?" he cried in childish anger.

Miroku shot him a look.

"C'mon, Inuyasha," Kagome scolded, "you're part youkai and can easily carry these rice bags. Uggh, stupid!"

He scoffed. "Whatever. If Miroku can fight youkai and live through Sango's beatings, he can carry a couple bags of rice."

Miroku glared as his head swelled over a tiny Inuyasha, anime style. "There were _twenty-five bags_, you _idiot_!"

Shippou had popped up on Kaede's shoulder during the encounter, Myouga on top of his shoulder, and their eyes were thin as they stared at the scene before them. "They all look like idiots to me," Shippou muttered.

"What'd you say, runt?" Inuyasha complained.

"I was just making an observation!" the kitsune stuck out his tongue.

"Yeah, well shut your—" He paused, his fist still clenched and about to beat Shippou's poor little head in. He sniffed the air, his eyes quickly changing into a different shade of gold.

Although everyone noticed, Kagome was the first to ask about it. "What's wrong, Inuyasha?"

Inuyasha put his fist down and turned to her and Miroku, his silver hair whipping behind his back.

"Sesshoumaru."

...

Sesshoumaru sat in the clearing where he'd led Rin, Jaken, and Ah-Uhn the night before. He leaned against a sturdy tree, deep in thought and twirling the blood-red glass lily "Hanabi" had given him just hours earlier.

He ignored Rin and Jaken's game of tag, the game Jaken obviously hated, and he let his mind wander, only thinking about one thing, one mermaid.

Hanabi.

She had kissed him last night, and he couldn't stop thinking about the way she felt against his cheek. The kiss was only a friendly one, which was a shame, but he somehow could not help the blush that threatened to actually show on his marked face, nor could he forget how affectionate she made him feel.

He forced himself into reality. Affectionate? No, it couldn't be affection, it just couldn't. After all, he had only just spoken to her, only just found out she even existed. But still…he couldn't stop thinking about her, and Rin's necklace didn't help any whenever he saw it.

But then again, he must've only been interested in the mermaid because he hadn't known the species existed outside his father's scrolls and few books. He must've been interested because he had never heard of mermaid sightings, and he wanted to learn about the creatures no one else knew much about (Myouga did not count). He was clueless as to how he could have feelings for a mermaid he still knew so little about. It couldn't be infatuation. It just couldn't.

At least, that's what he told himself.

But that didn't explain the way his heart fluttered when she smiled at him, or how he had to fight blushes and smiles a lot more lately. Myouga had said mermaids couldn't perform spells and enchantments, despite the popular belief that they could sing their way into a man's heart until he drowned himself, but now Sesshoumaru couldn't be so sure.

He didn't know what these peculiar feelings were. It didn't make sense that he felt them, but they felt so right, but not completely figured out, as though there were parts of these feelings he had yet to realize. There were pieces missing, and he had to be patient until he figured out what they were. He hadn't known Hanabi long enough to feel these emotions to the extreme, but it was like a little twinge of what was to come. He was confused.

He exhaled through his nose, staring at the mermaid flower, the glass lily Hanabi had given him. All morning, he had been able to part with it, and at Rin's squeals of delight at the pretty thing and Jaken's obnoxious and never-ending questions about where he found it, he refused to let it go. He traced a clawed finger against the smooth petals, his fingerprints somehow not leaving an imprint on the glass. Maybe it was some sort of magic, he didn't know.

He hoped the flower was unbreakable. He refused to let it come to harm, even if it was just a flower, because it was a gift, a gift from "Hanabi" herself, and he treasured it.

Hanabi. Such a breathtaking specimen, indeed.

And at this thought, Sesshoumaru's heart began to beat faster again, and in his deep thoughts of the mermaid, he hadn't realized he had accidentally let down his guard, releasing his scent as his mask began to slip. It was enough for Inuyasha to sense, and Sesshoumaru sensed his half-brother himself only right before he and a few members of his party (the taijiya and two-tailed cat were absent) burst through the trees and grass, startling Rin and Jaken and even the sleeping Ah-Uhn.

But despite all this, Sesshoumaru continued to stare at his flower, refusing to look away.

...

Kagome ran after Inuyasha, since he forgot to let her ride his back in his hurry. She didn't mind much, but she felt her heartbeat increase.

Sesshoumaru.

The asshole, staying here and allowing his scent to flare up! But strangely enough, she couldn't get very angry at the taiyoukai. She actually felt guilty. It was her fault he was going to get caught here. If she hadn't spoken to him last night, he might've left instead of sticking around. It wasn't that she was afraid he would lose a fight against Inuyasha, since that only happened a few times when he was caught off-guard, and Sesshoumaru was stronger anyway, she admitted, but she was sure he wouldn't be very happy at missing the chance to come see "Hanabi" tonight.

She'd be lying if she said she didn't want to see him either, but that was only because she liked having power over him. It wasn't bad either, speaking to him civilly. She kind of liked the softer side to him. Besides, what if Sesshoumaru squealed about where he'd been and who he'd met last night? Although he didn't know it was Kagome he'd talked to, Inuyasha's guard would be up, and that would definitely be annoying when she wanted to run off to the lake. So she was nervous, especially because she couldn't run as fast as Inuyasha, and she couldn't stop him from finding his brother.

Unless Sesshoumaru wanted to be found. He could have had a plan involving the kidnapping of the Tetsusaiga, even though it didn't make sense to her. She was pretty sure he knew how important Inuyasha's sword was, how he could die without it, and whether he admitted it or not, Kagome knew Sesshoumaru refused to be the one to kill his brother. There were many times he could have killed him, but he didn't, so as far as she knew, he wouldn't want to steal the Tetsusaiga and make Inuyasha suffer.

Little did she know, Sesshoumaru's whole purpose for being around _was_ to steal his father's sword, but that was a different story.

Soon, Kagome caught up to Inuyasha, Miroku next to her with Shippou on his shoulder. Myouga had stayed with Kaede to avoid any danger, and even though she didn't know it, he didn't want to see Sesshoumaru again so soon.

Kagome panted from the long run, but refused to bend over on her knees to catch her breath. She was still as stubborn as ever, she supposed. She gasped nervously when she saw, from over Inuyasha's shoulder, Sesshoumaru leaning against a tree in the clearing. He looked to relaxed, like he didn't even know they were standing there.

"Sesshoumaru!" Inuyasha cried, unsheathing Tetsusaiga threateningly, just in case. "What the hell are you doing here?"

When Inuyasha took out his sword, he moved his shoulders in a fighting stance, and Kagome could clearly see Sesshoumaru now. Her mouth dropped open at the sight of him staring lovingly at the very flower she had given to him last night.

She didn't know why he was looking at it like that. She didn't know why he couldn't seem to take his eyes off it. She didn't know why he was letting himself get so absorbed in it instead of paying attention to his rowdy brother. She felt her cheeks and nose turn pink, although she didn't know the real reason why he was so caught up in her present.

Sesshoumaru soon looked up, annoyance in his furrowed brow rather than surprise. "Inuyasha," he muttered, "my purpose for being here is none of your concern."

Inuyasha scoffed. "To hell it isn't! You obviously knew I was staying here, didn't you?"

"Perhaps," he said calmly, turning his eyes back to the lily. "It would be hard to miss your vile stench."

He growled audibly. "What do you want, Tetsusaiga? Well, you ain't gonna have it!"

When it came down to it, Inuyasha was actually correct, but there was no way Sesshoumaru would admit that to him now. Hanabi had sidetracked him, but that didn't mean he wouldn't act on his plan to swipe the sword. "I am not planning anything against you just yet," he half-lied, "so you need not feel threatened by me."

"Bullshit!" Inuyasha cried. "Like I'm supposed to believe that? Get your ass up and leave. You ain't welcome here!"

Kagome gulped. Like always, Inuyasha judged things on his own feelings. She wasn't giving him much credit, but right now, she wanted him to leave his brother alone and let him stay for tonight's rendezvous with her. If she didn't get her reassurance that Sesshoumaru would be quiet about last night, she would surely be paranoid enough to go crazy.

With the thought, Kagome decided to step in. "Come on, Inuyasha," she put a hand on his shoulder. "Sesshoumaru's not going to hurt us, otherwise he would've done it already."

Inuyasha didn't seem very comforted, knowing his own side was beginning to turn against him. "Keh," he scoffed, "he might not be planning anything now, but he'll come after us, Kagome, and find a way to take Tetsusaiga while he's here."

Sesshoumaru would've rolled his eyes if he didn't want to look away from the flower in his hands. "Listen to your wench, Inuyasha, and dismiss yourself." He knew he was acting differently, saying things he wouldn't usually say, but he wanted to be left in peace with his thoughts of Hanabi. He wanted Inuyasha to leave him alone.

And although Kagome was used to it, she was hurt at being called a wench by Sesshoumaru, who had been so kind to her before, but she soon remembered he hadn't recognized her the night before, so of course he would still act indifferently to her, no matter how much he liked Hanabi.

"Coward," Inuyasha challenged.

"No," Sesshoumaru said. "Annoyed."

Kagome wanted to leave now. She didn't want to drive Sesshoumaru away. Her eyes met with Miroku's, who still stood silent beside her, and she pleaded with her eyes. He seemed to catch on, because he said, "Come, Inuyasha. Lord Sesshoumaru is obviously no threat. It would be a waste of energy and a pointless battle if we remain here."

Inuyasha growled at him. "What, you want me to just walk away?"

Shippou seemed to understand too. "Duh," he gave him a look.

"Come on, Inuyasha," Kagome said to her friend, the hanyou she had learned to love over the years. "Let's go back and help Kaede. We were awfully rude, leaving her like that. And you have to help Miroku with that rice this time."

Like always, Inuyasha couldn't say no to her, but it didn't mean he wasn't still angry at Sesshoumaru. "I can't believe all of you want to run away!" he cried. "Sesshoumaru's just gonna come back for us and my sword, and we'll be unprepared then. We can't just up and leave now!"

Sesshoumaru narrowed his eyes at the flower, the glare meant for Inuyasha, who was just not shutting up. "Go on, hanyou," he spat, "I am in no mood to deal with you now. Leave."

Inuyasha wasn't about to back out, and Kagome knew it, so she groaned, rolling her eyes, and moved onto drastic measures. "Inuyasha…" She waited until he looked at her. "Osuwari!"

Inuyasha let out a cry before his face met the ground, swallowing a handful of dirt. Sesshoumaru didn't look up and his expression did not change, but he knew what had happened. It was very amusing.

"Come on, Miroku," Kagome shook her head. "Let's get him back."

Miroku nodded, annoyed. "The idiot made me lug almost twenty-five heavy bags of rice all morning, and now I have to carry him."

Kagome smiled at his muttering, leaning over to help him with Inuyasha. Before she picked him up, though, she stood straight and turned to the taiyoukai at the other end of the clearing. "Ja ne, Sesshoumaru," she said politely, but she was serious. If all went well, she would be seeing him again that night.

Sesshoumaru was surprised at the unexpected goodbye, but he didn't looked up from the dear lily, nor did he feel obligated to answer.

Kagome smiled her goodbyes to Rin, Jaken, and Ah-Uhn, who had remained silent throughout the encounter, Rin from politeness and Jaken because he had a large piece of cloth stuck in his mouth (Rin had placed it there during their game), and he couldn't seem to get it out.

At Rin's wave and giggle, Kagome leaned back down to pick up Inuyasha, but before she and Miroku could touch him, the spell began to wear off, so Kagome repeated her assault. "Osuwari," she said calmly, and Inuyasha groaned at the sharp impact again.

Kagome and Miroku, and even little Shippou, grabbed tufts of Inuyasha's fire rat clothing, dragging him along the ground. Kagome sighed and pulled Inuyasha along, exhausted after a mere five minutes, although Sesshoumaru and his wards were out of sight by now.

"Inuyasha, you idiot," she muttered to him, another "osuwari" spell put on him, as she, Miroku, and Shippou let him go to rest and Inuyasha began to get up again.

Damn, she needed a break.

...

A/N: Revised. FYI, Kaede does _not_ say that silly "ye" thing that the dubs decided to come up with. She doesn't say it in the manga, so she's not going to say it here. And another **major change** I've made is this: instead of Kagome being a princess (because that's unbelievably cliché) I've just made her dad an important officer, instead of the king himself. His name has been officially changed from Ryuu (which is overused) to Kyuzou, which is the name of my favorite character in the Kurosawa film _The Seven Samurai_.


	5. missing

...

**the mermaid  
**by mystical spirits

**[missing]**

"_Yesterday is but a dream, and tomorrow is only a vision, but today well lived makes every yesterday a dream of happiness and every tomorrow a vision of hope."  
— Sanskrit Proverb_ —

...

It was hotter than yesterday, that was for sure. It didn't help having no trees directly in the village, and the shade – if there was even any to begin with – was no help. Sango wiped her forehead with her bare arm, already having rolled up her kimono sleeves and putting her hair back with a tie Kagome had let her borrow.

_There'd better be no demons itching for a fight today_, she whined in her head. If Kirara had to transform for any reason, she knew she wouldn't be able to stand the additional heat from her cat's fire.

Luckily, though, there hadn't been any trouble since they arrived the night before last. No one was even remotely close by, even when she started a fire and the smoke spread out into the sky like a beacon.

Sango told herself she didn't mind being alone with Kirara. After all, it was just what she wanted, just what she asked Inuyasha for. She had all the time in the world to pray at each and every grave, which she promised to visit at least once a day for the next two weeks. Even now, she was hunting around the village for any wild flowers to decorate them with. It was harder work than it sounded, especially with how difficult the weather was being. It wouldn't be long before heatstroke caught up to her.

She was trained in the art of demon slaying, and she knew how to put up with hard times and terrible conditions, but the heat today made her stomach feel like it was about to sink into the ground, and she could hear her pulse in her ears. She just knew she was going to take a bath later because the stink of the sweat on her neck was worse than usual. She felt absolutely disgusting, but on the bright side, there was no one around to see her looking so terrible.

And it was all very worth it anyway, because she was here with her friends and family and cat, and no matter how miserable it made her feel in her village, she felt very, very lucky for the chance of being there.

Nevertheless, she frowned. Passing Midoriko's cave with an armful of tiny flowers, she paused.

And she listened very, very carefully.

The village was empty, and the sound of silence was weighing down on her. She wasn't used to being so lonely. Kirara was asleep in a tiny hole underneath an abandoned hut, and even though she was on the other side of the village, Sango could swear she heard the cat's snores. She could hear certain floorboards and the wooden gate creaking, despite how little of a breeze there was and how no one was around. Her footsteps sounded ten times louder than usual, and if she listened closely, it was like the flowers were actually whispering to her. It was all very eerie, and she didn't understand it.

The spookiness suddenly made her very lonely. She never really noticed how much she loved her friends, how important they all were to her. She wanted to be here, wanted to visit her deceased loved ones, but she already missed Miroku and the way he made her feel so many different emotions all at once. Even when she was angry with him and his wandering hands, she always felt wide awake when she slapped him. It was like that with Inuyasha and Shippou and especially Kagome too. They made her feel alive again.

She never realized it before, but it was like she had died the night her village did, the night her brother was taken away and everything fell apart. She was buried alive and thought for dead, but she had always known she wasn't just a victim – she was a survivor. But as she looked around her at the abandoned village, she didn't feel much like a survivor at all. She felt like she was a part of this ghost town. She felt empty.

Despite how much of a fight she put up to come here, more than anything, she wanted to go home. But there she was, and it wasn't the same, by herself. The only home she had left was with her friends and fiancé, but despite that, she knew something was still missing.

Kohaku. No one knew where he was now, what he was doing, what he remembered, if anything at all.

Sango didn't know a thing. It was killing her from the inside out. She knew she couldn't be happy, not completely. She couldn't marry Miroku or relax in the hot springs with Kagome or fight with Inuyasha or look for jewel shards day and night. Miroku and Kagome definitely noticed how off she'd been lately, ever since Naraku died and Kohaku went missing. She knew she could only be cured of her depression if she could see Kohaku again.

She was determined. This two week "vacation" wasn't going to be spent just praying every day and thinking about everything that ruined her life two years ago. She couldn't wallow in the past anymore. She was going to take advantage of this spare time.

She was going to find Kohaku, even if it was the last thing she ever did.

There was a sudden gust of wind, strong enough to sweep a cluster of flowers out of her arms. And suddenly, Sango didn't feel so unbelievably hot anymore.

...

Kagome floated on her back in the lake, already transformed, and waited for Sesshoumaru to appear, if he hadn't already left after everything that happened with Inuyasha. But of course he would come, she thought. He couldn't take his eyes off that silly flower earlier, meaning he probably wanted to see "Hanabi" that night. Something stupid like a little encounter with his younger brother wouldn't get in his way. It just wouldn't.

She kept floating, trying to convince herself Sesshoumaru _was_ going to come, and she didn't notice he already had.

"You seem puzzled."

She started, shooting up in the water and almost crying the f-bomb out in surprise. She was glad she didn't, since Hanabi would _never_ say something like that. It was just Kagome who was the potty-mouth. "You scared me," she chuckled in embarrassment.

Sesshoumaru's expression barely changed. If anything, he just looked a tad more comfortable. She couldn't have known what he was thinking, how he was mentally scolding himself, determined to act correctly tonight, like he was supposed to, instead of acting foolish, bumbling, and lovesick like the night before. She couldn't have known he was ashamed at how silly he presented himself at their first official meeting.

"My apologies," he muttered, just glad to see her again. "I assumed you were paying enough attention to notice me."

Kagome rolled her eyes, wading towards the cliff's edge, where he was standing. "Well, excuse me for thinking."

"What was it you were thinking about?" he tried to swallow his nervousness down. It would not do to act like a coward tonight.

"None of your business," she stuck her tongue out at him childishly.

_You would do well to put that tongue back inside your mouth before I put it in mine._ Sesshoumaru stiffened. No, he did _not _just think that! There was definitely something wrong with him. He was being immature. He never had thoughts like this, _never_, and he was clueless as to why they were acting up now.

He said nothing, still tongue-tied at his thoughts, but instead sat on the grass to be closer to Hanabi. He pulled a leg upwards to rest his one arm on it, letting his other leg hang off the edge of the plateau, his shoe skimming the water.

Kagome swam closer, resting her hands on the edge next to Sesshoumaru's left leg. "I was… Well, I didn't think you were going to come."

Sesshoumaru was puzzled. "What gave you such an idea?"

Kagome didn't know what to say. She couldn't very well tell him she knew of his meeting with her and his half-brother, as well as Miroku and Shippou. "I don't know," she shrugged. "But it doesn't matter. You're here now, aren't you?"

"…Of course."

They sat in silence for a minute or so, their gazes traveling from the scenery to each other, although for different reasons. Kagome just wanted to break the silence, however comfortable it was (but "comfortable" wasn't the word she would use, not exactly, because this was Sesshoumaru for god's sake). She knew Sesshoumaru came all this way to talk to her, but for some reason he wasn't speaking. It was really rather dull, if she said so herself.

She didn't want to just talk all night anyway. It was so overrated, she thought, even if she could never seem to shut up in the first place. It would be absolutely boring if they just talked and talked and talked and sat there simply talking. She had a very short attention span when it came down to it, and she had to do something with her hands, at least.

It wasn't long until she came up with a plan. It was childish like she was, but it would be fun. She didn't care if Sesshoumaru didn't know the meaning of the word, because damn it, he was going to have fun no matter how silly her activity was. The youkai was such a stiff, and that was _not_ attractive.

"Come swim with me," she suggested more than commanded.

To say Sesshoumaru was startled would be an understatement. He bristled at the request, abruptly swinging his head down to her. "Swim?"

She just smirked as prettily as she could, nodding. "Yeah, you know, that thing where you kick your legs in the water and move around and sometimes get your hair wet?" His lack of expression made it difficult for her to tell if he was amused or not. "Look, just a quick swim, I promise, and just right here too. You don't have to swim all the way out, just help me find shells at the bottom."

"Shells? Why?"

She laughed nervously. "Duh, to make necklaces or something. We'll find the prettiest little shells and bring them back here. You don't have to make anything if you don't want to—" _If you don't make something, I'm going to kick your ass._ "—but I'm _bored_."

_Kagome, what are you doing?_ she scolded herself. _This is Inuyasha's brother, for crying out loud! He's dangerous and _tried to kill you_, if you forgot. What are you doing, being so casual with him? He might not even know how to swim! _She almost snorted at the thought of him with a floatie and water wings, and she had to pretend she was clearing her throat to cover it up.

_But there's nothing wrong with it_, she shook her thoughts away. _I can't stop the barrier from letting him in, and there's no way I'm spending every night down there with Dad. Hanabi _has_ to be his friend. He can't go blabbing around about the mermaids being here, especially since Inuyasha might hear and I won't be able to come back. Asking him for a swim is _absolutely necessary.

Sesshoumaru was oblivious to Kagome's inner battle. He was still trying to get over his shock at her request. To swim with the girl he silently adored these past few nights was…unthinkable. But he didn't have a choice. Even if he wanted to say no, he wouldn't be able to find it in him to refuse, not with her smiling so cutely. But then again, he swore he wouldn't act so boldly like before. He promised to act like himself, calm and emotionless, but nice enough so she wouldn't go away.

"Fine." He was such a pushover.

Kagome visibly relaxed. She had successfully persuaded (if you could call it that) Sesshoumaru, Lord of the Western Lands, to actually swim, and with a mermaid, no less. It sounded like something out of a fairy tale. "Right then, let's go."

She began wading out into the lake, but she didn't make it very far. Sesshoumaru was having an inner struggle of his own and hadn't moved.

"Hey, are you coming?"

He came back to the real world, uncertain what to do. "Yes." He had to make a quick decision, so he moved closer to the edge of the cliff, still fully clothed.

Kagome noticed. "Are you really going to swim with all those layers on?"

He swallowed, saying nothing. The pretty mermaid was going to see his lack of an arm. He knew she would be disgusted with it, and he couldn't go around bare-chested because she would surely see his weakness. But he didn't want his clothes to get wet, since Rin and Jaken would notice and ask questions he wouldn't want to answer. Not to mention, he wouldn't get the chance to swim with Hanabi if he didn't get over his fear and just take everything off.

Hesitantly, he removed his bulky armor, setting it on the grass. He then discarded both his inner and outer haori, leaving his yellow heku obi to hold up his hakamas. His fluffy moko-moko, shoes, and socks were also removed to avoid getting wet. Although he tried not to look shameful, he was self-conscious about his lack of appendage. Unfortunately, it wasn't long before Kagome realized what she was looking at.

Watching him change, she realized her mistake of asking Sesshoumaru to strip down in the first place. When she requested it, she simply knew it would be hard for him to swim with so much added weight, since the water pressure was difficult enough for someone without a fin like hers, but when he actually _took off_ his upper clothing, she remembered he was a _male_ and was undressing in front of her. Her cheeks turned red, but Sesshoumaru never did catch it in his own embarrassment. She couldn't stop her adolescent hormones and her eyes from trailing across his naked chest. It was her female instinct, no matter how pure she supposedly was.

She had no idea the demon lord could look like _that_. And she thought he was beautiful enough before. She knew he was strong, but never thought about the muscular build he must have had because of it.

But as her eyes studied Sesshoumaru's form, she finally noticed his arm, or lack of it, to be precise. She suddenly felt very, very stupid as he slid into the water in front of her.

Sesshoumaru noticed Kagome's stare only then, and he looked down at her with something akin to shame, unaware he could feel that way. He believed she would swim away once she saw it, so he was surprised when she moved closer instead, resting her hand on the closed, healed skin. He felt something under his skin jump at her touch.

He was glad she hadn't recoiled at the sight, but the butterflies in his stomach hadn't calmed down. His immediate belief was that Hanabi wouldn't approve of his situation, because it would mean he had lost a fight and gained a weakness all because of his own half-brother, and a hanyou, no less. He couldn't look away from her face, searching for the tiniest hint of a reaction. He automatically erected all emotional barriers, freezing his face over and making sure he looked as strong and confident as ever, because if she rejected him, he wouldn't want her to know how much it would affect him.

She, on the other hand, didn't completely know what she was doing, touching his wounded arm like that, but she somehow pitied the taiyoukai for Inuyasha's attack, or the results of it, more specifically (because whether Sesshoumaru liked it or not, it really _was_ his fault for provoking Inuyasha like he did). One look at him just made her heart sink. It didn't matter who he was or how weird the situation must've seemed, because he was looking so very vulnerable right now, no matter how hard he was trying to hide it, and Kagome didn't know how to react. She just traced her fingers against the smooth skin and frowned.

She was overwhelmed with empathy. The kind-hearted miko in her didn't think he deserved all the complications his arm was giving him. She knew he had done stupid, cruel things throughout his life and had never really been sorry, but for every bad thing he did, he performed a good deed to make up for it. He took care of Rin, put up with Jaken, allowed Inuyasha to escape during a handful of battles (there were surely a few times he could have killed Inuyasha easily, but something must've made him change his mind), and he even saved her, Kagome, a time or two. As far as bad demons went, he could've been a lot worse. Just because he was a stereotypical demon who wanted strength and power, it didn't mean he was invincible. Losing his arm was probably devastating for him because demons had pride, and his drastic injury was most likely a disgrace to a youkai's ego. It was an embarrassment.

Kagome suddenly wanted to do nothing more than regenerate his arm for him. It was possible, she believed, with her miko abilities, but unfortunately, she didn't have that sort of experience. She still didn't know much about her powers. She mentally noted to speak to Kaede about that in the morning. She would be taught how to help Sesshoumaru, and – although this was definitely _not_ part of the plan to keep Sesshoumaru under her control – she would make him happy again.

As she thought, her gaze did not stray from Sesshoumaru's skin. She barely even noticed she was still touching the wound. If she had just looked up, she would've noticed the way he was looking so uneasily at her.

She knew she was out of her mind when she started moving closer to him. There was no reason to overstep her boundaries and hug Sesshoumaru, but she was doing just that. The embrace wasn't a full hug, just her laying her forehead against his chest, and her hand was not yet removed from his arm. But it was still just as unexpected.

Sesshoumaru was beyond shocked. He couldn't remember the last time someone, let alone a girl, had cuddled against him. Even Rin just seemed to admire him from afar. It didn't seem right that Hanabi was _not_ disgusted by him.

It took a while for him to relax under her embrace, for him to understand her acceptance, and for him to realize her warmth was something he wanted very, very much. Relieved, he stared down at her affectionately, allowing the emotion to trickle from his eyes just this once, considering she wasn't looking anyway. He began to move his other arm to hold her tighter against him, but he stopped himself before he could touch her. That was crossing the line.

He put it back at his side, but Kagome had felt the movement nevertheless. She was surprised at it, but she understood the gesture. He needed someone to accept his disability, his one physical flaw, and it was very important to him that she had.

She smiled to herself. They had both been enemies for the past two years, but despite all that, she could somehow understand him after just two nights. Even if she had barely done anything, she was glad to have helped him jump over this hurdle and feel better about himself, and it was like they had actually tightened their bond because of these last few minutes. Something about this otherwise insignificant event had brought them closer, like they were friends even though Kagome was acting both caring and selfish all at once, and even though Sesshoumaru didn't even know who she was, really.

It was something she had to get used to, being Sesshoumaru's friend. His obvious attraction to her was something else that would take a while to be comfortable with (she wasn't stupid; he seemed to like "Hanabi" very much).

"Do you ever wish you had two arms like everyone else?" she whispered just loud enough for him to hear.

Sesshoumaru didn't know what to say, knowing his reputation was at stake, but he found himself responding. "Yes."

She pulled him closer, trying to ignore the way he tensed. She knew he was ashamed, and she didn't think that fit him at all. "It's okay," she admitted. "It's okay to feel that way. It's only natural." She pulled away from the embrace, surprised at how much she already missed the way it felt. Her thoughts not lingering on it, she looked up at him and smiled like a mother would after telling her child there were really no monsters under the bed. "But, you know, only one arm…doesn't make you any less of who you are." Was it just the moonlight, or were Sesshoumaru's eyes really twinkling like that? "I _know_ you're still one of the strongest youkai out there, and I _know_ you aren't weak. In fact," she laughed, "for you to be this powerful with only _one arm_, well, that's pretty impressive!"

Sesshoumaru stared at her longingly, but she didn't notice because she was already putting more distance between them, signaling the end of their sappy moment.

"Arigatou," he muttered as emotionlessly as he could at this point. His heart was swelling in his chest as painfully as ever, but that moment had changed everything. After that, he was no longer afraid of this mermaid like before. She was still an enigma he wanted to figure out, but Hanabi was not just some dangerous girl he had to be careful around. He always hoped that by learning more about her, his attraction would decrease, but it only proved to have an opposite reaction, and his pulse was only beating faster and faster than ever before.

Kagome smiled at his thanks, and she grabbed his hand in a sorry attempt to lighten the mood. "C'mon," she tugged him farther into the water, "let's get those shells, okay?"

Sesshoumaru was grateful for the change of subject, and he waded in the water, following Hanabi. Soon the water flowed right below his shoulders, but Hanabi was still floating in the water, allowing her to remain at the same height as before.

"Right," she smiled, "just help me find small ones, okay? It wouldn't hurt to make sure they're pretty, either." She did not speak to him forcefully, and Sesshoumaru was aware she wanted him to relax. "You can start looking now. If you find any shells and can't carry them all, just put it on the grass." She looked behind her at the lake. "I'll go get some string, alright? I'll hurry back, I promise."

He nodded once in understanding, waiting for her to leave before diving into the water, as it was only polite and he was, of course, the son of a nobleman. She smiled at him one last time before turning and diving very dolphin-like into the sea. The last he saw of her was her find, sparkling in the moonlight, and then she was gone.

He waited a few moments after she left, not really knowing why, before he submerged himself underwater.

He did not puff out his cheeks despite his lack of oxygen, for he was a demon and therefore held more of a lung capacity. His hair, however, was still long, and being a demon did not change the fact that it would billow around him and blind his view unless he pushed it out of his face.

He forced his body to sink to the bottom of the lake, minding his feet in case a sharp shell had decided to camouflage with the sand. He didn't understand why Hanabi had asked him to find specifically small and pretty shells, considering every shell he saw fit the description perfectly to begin with. In fact, the shells were _lovely_, even the imperfections and askew angles looking picturesque.

In no time at all, the grass was littered with shells of all kinds. There were brown ones, pink ones, shiny black ones, funny-shaped ones that shone in different colors, blue ones that camouflaged like a chameleon in the water, miniature conch shells, golden worm seashells, beaded periwinkles, tiny junonias, banded tulips, wentletraps, lion's paws, and angel wings, among others. Figuring this was more than enough, Sesshoumaru was about to stop his collecting altogether, as he was also sure Hanabi would soon return, but he felt a strange tug in his gut that urged him to go down one last time.

He swam all the way to the seafloor, still by the cliff, and looked for something, although he didn't know what it was exactly. He turned his head as he searched, and what caught his eye startled him, drawing him closer to the glimmer rooted in the sand.

He saw the tiny bush of red glass lilies, most likely the same bush Hanabi had approached when she plucked his gift last night. He bent down, closer to the niche it laid in, and studied each flower carefully. He was delighted to discover that none of these lilies could even be compared in beauty to the one he had received (but then again, perhaps it was only pretty because it was Hanabi who had given it to him).

Sesshoumaru was about to pull back, content with the barely-noticeable flaws the other blossoms had, but he remembered the tug he had felt before, and he moved closer to the hold cut into the cliff's edge. He moved another inch closer, and it was enough.

Something sparkled.

Intrigued, he reached out for it. It was mostly buried in the sand, and only a tiny slice of it emerged from its hiding place. Still, he was able to retrieve it and was surprised at its light weight. It was not until he grabbed it carefully and swam up to the shore for air that he actually examined his treasure.

It was a shell, naturally, but this was nothing like he had ever seen before. It was a pretty blue on one side, a blue that matched the meridian color of the crescent moon on his own forehead. On the other side, the shell was a pearly white, matching the color Hanabi often wore. The shell seemed to be a species entirely of its own, as it was thick but not bulky. It was hard yet smooth in texture, and while it glimmered extravagantly, it was also not blinding. It was small in size, but larger than the other shells Sesshoumaru had collected, about the size of one of the red flowers printed on his outer haori.

But that was not what was strange about it. It was gorgeous, of course, and unique in its own right, but it was something else that caught his attention about it:

It was shaped like a crescent moon.

It looked exactly like the mark on Sesshoumaru's forehead when it was flipped to the navy side. He couldn't help but remember the star-shaped necklace Rin was so fond of wearing, though it once belonged to Hanabi. _That_ piece of jewelry looked just like the mark on _Hanabi's_ forehead.

Sesshoumaru was never one to believe in fate or destiny, but this was almost too much. Was it a mere coincidence that his ward held the image of Hanabi's star, which she had given to Rin? And now that Sesshoumaru himself had found something that mimicked his own symbol, was it not ironic that Hanabi would have it, as he planned on giving it to her when she returned?

No, he would _not_ give it to her when she returned, not so soon.

He had other plans first.

Brushing off the strangeness of the moon and stars and shells and whatever else decided to play tricks on his mind, he pocketed the shell in hakamas, again sitting on the grassy cliff's edge just before Kagome emerged from the lake, her hair flipping back against her shoulder blades and the string in her hands.

"Gomen nasai," she apologized half-heartedly. "I know I was gone for a while."

He shrugged his clothes back on hurriedly as she spoke, not paying attention to how soaked his hair was. "It is of no consequence," he commented. "You were not away so long."

Kagome's eyes strayed to the pile of shells beside him. "Of course not," she said sarcastically. _So much for taking a swim together_, she thought silently. _But it'd be awkward to swim with him anyway_. "I'm rather prompt."

"Apparently so."

Kagome swam closer to the edge of the cliff as Sesshoumaru sat in the same position from earlier. She set the silver string on the ground, shifting her body so as to lean on her elbows, unintentionally bringing herself closer to the youkai above her.

She picked her string up again, expanding the length she wanted before nibbling on the edge to cut it. Sesshoumaru watched carefully, swallowing as he studied Hanabi's delicate teeth gnawing on it.

"It's a special string," Kagome interrupted his thoughts, which had began to wander in ways he was not used to, "made by some married mermaids who work on underwater artwork. The string's made of seahorse hair, and it's light and delicate but completely strong, so you don't have to worry about it breaking. Only a merperson's teeth can cut it, see?"

He nodded once as she tied a knot at one end of it. Before she reached out for the shells, though, she turned to him. "Wanna make one?"

He turned away, refusing her offer. He would not be acting like himself if he stopped so low as to make jewelry. And yet—

"Alright," Kagome shrugged, a bit disappointed. She turned back to her work and brought some shells closer to her, beginning to randomly string them together. "So what do you want to talk about?"

He did not reply, but instead stared at the ball of seahorse string. His silence caused Kagome to look up at him curiously, and he caught her gaze. Making up his mind, he reached his hand out to the string, picking it up, and aware that he was still being watched, he extended the string to a certain length without a word.

The length he chose was much shorter than what Kagome had picked for herself, but of course it was intentional (_because youkai _never_ made mistakes, _Kagome thought). When he had finished, he looked back to Kagome, holding out the string to her, his finger marking where he wanted her to cut. She understood, and, taking the string from him carefully, she bit into it, severing the thread.

"Here," she said, keeping the ball of string and handing the length of it to Sesshoumaru, who took it a bit hesitantly.

"Arigatou," he muttered, earning a grin from the mermaid. It wasn't every day she heard the demon lord thank someone, and twice in one night, no less! He tied a knot in one end, once Kagome had stopped looking at him and turned away to work on her own creation.

"So," she cleared her throat, "what brings you to the area anyway?" She had been wondering this since earlier, when he practically claimed to Inuyasha that he was just passing through. There was no way she believed that, and although she knew why he was _staying_ here, she did not know why he came in the first place.

He searched the pile of shells for the ones that shone the most, picking one up carefully with his claws. "There is no particular reason," he lied. He wasn't sure he wanted to tell her that he came to steal something from his half-brother. He didn't want to imagine what she would think of him then.

"You're lying." Damn it, she could tell?

"I am." And since when did he admit such things?

She looked up at him for a brief second. "Are you going to explain yourself?"

He threaded another shell onto the string. He was nearly half-done already, but then again, it wasn't exactly a difficult task. "I suppose," he hesitated.

"Go on, then."

He paused for quite some time, unsure of how to admit his purpose of being there without sounding like a completely selfish idiot. "Tetsusaiga," he finally blurted out, refusing to make eye contact in the fear that she would make him feel unbearably guilty.

She looked up again, but this time more swiftly, so swift she could have sworn she heard her neck crack. Her necklace was nearly finished, but no matter how pretty it was, it couldn't make her disappointed and uneasy frown look any better. "That sword…doesn't belong to you."

He focused on his craft to avoid her faze, knowing she was not pleased. He rested the string on his leg to pick up another shell, this one blue and twisty. "No," he muttered, "it does not."

She didn't look away from his face, prepared to analyze it to see if he would lie or not, but she didn't know how well that would work, considering he barely seemed to know the meaning of the word "emotion". "Then why do you want it?" She mentally cheered for herself and her quick thinking; of course she knew the answer, but _Hanabi_ wouldn't have a clue. Even in her shock, she could stay on track. It made her very proud.

"I do not believed I have said I wanted it."

"You do, though," she pushed.

"Yes," he fidgeted, at loss for words. He seemed to be speechless about a lot lately, but it didn't take much longer for him to make his confession. "The Tetsusaiga is powerful."

"So? So are you."

"Then it proves I am more deserving of it than Inuyasha, my half-brother." He didn't know she was already aware of the whole story, let alone the fact that she had once loved the said hanyou (she did not know if he still loved her or if he had moved on, like she was beginning to, but she didn't stay on that mental topic for too long).

"You're wrong," Kagome said casually, as though she were speaking about the weather or what her favorite color was. "You're already strong, so you don't need a weapon like the Tetsusaiga. Inuyasha, though, isn't as powerful as you, so he needs his sword to defend himself. I know what Tetsusaiga's powers are, and it seems to me that Inuyasha would need it more than you would. You can defend yourself in many ways, but he can't."

Sesshoumaru looked up at her finally. "If I'm correct, you have the Tenseiga. You deserve this sword because it can teach you to feel good things, like love and protection and stuff. It's supposed to make you a better person, I think. You're strong physically, but not so much socially, so now you have to get stronger in that way. Why else would you be protecting Rin, right? And if you weren't improving, would you still be talking to me?

"Inuyasha is stronger socially, since he has companions, and that's why he needs the Tetsusaiga, to become stronger physically. See? You each have the sword you do because it can teach you both to get stronger in the ways you weren't before."

Kagome smiled at Sesshoumaru to cover the snicker that was starting to leak out. By the look on his face, she had one-upped him, had shut him up completely, and it was very, very amusing to get the better of a taiyoukai who had very strict beliefs. She turned away from his scrutinizing scare when it started to make her nervous. "Uh," she cleared her throat, "sorry, I'm not making much sense, am I?"

His gaze softened, but just barely, considering his frown was still set in a straight line. "Yes, you make perfect sense." He looked away, out into the lake. "Perhaps you are correct. Both Inuyasha and I are changing, now that we use our swords our father has passed down to us."

"Have you used Tenseiga then?" she blinked.

"Yes," he admitted, "on both Jaken and Rin."

Kagome was startled. She put her necklace down carefully, not backing down from Sesshoumaru's gold stare. "They have…both died?"

"The sword smith Kaijinbou killed Jaken with my other sword, the Toukijin. Before I even knew Rin's name, she had been torn apart by a pack of demonic wolves."

Kagome's eyes widened in horror, not making the connection between Kouga's wolves with those Sesshoumaru spoke of. She remained silent for quite a while, staring at the grass before her with a stricken look on her face. _That's…terrible!_ she thought, but somehow she couldn't find a way to put it into spoken words. She didn't think there was any way to verbalize anything after that, and even if she could say something, she doubted any emotion in her voice could do this shock justice.

Rin was such a young girl. It wasn't fair for her to have died at such a young age. If it wasn't for Tenseiga, she would have missed out on everything wonderful about life (and everything horrible too). But even now, she was carefree and innocent. How could such a child die so tragically, so messily? She even pitied Jaken, despite how annoying he was. Even he didn't deserve the blow that came from the other end of Toukijin. He was too loyal, although rude, and didn't hesitate when it came to serving and defending his master.

Rin and Jaken. Kagome was suddenly very thankful for Sesshoumaru's sudden changes of heart.

"You see?" she blurted out shakily, too shaken to say her other thoughts out loud. "You really _are_ changing."

Sesshoumaru just returned to his craft, picking up another seashell and attempting to veer off topic. He did not want to think about Hanabi's obvious empathy reflecting in her eyes. Such compassion touched him a little too much, and he did not do well with such foreign feelings; he did not know how to accept them correctly. "Perhaps."

The two spent another moment in silence as they worked on their art, the conversation suddenly a little more awkward.

"Will you still try to steal it?" Kagome muttered. She did not have to remind him what she meant.

"I don't know," he said truthfully. Although her reasoning was enough for him to no longer need Tetsusaiga, he had tried to take it for so long, and he wasn't sure how easily he could stop. It was his Pandora's Box, a trinket he wanted simply to have and boast about, something he wanted just to see if he was capable enough to control it. It was something he wanted to satisfy his curiosity, and the power that came with it was a nice bonus. And even though Hanabi disproved of his taking it, there was still something in the back of his mind that attracted him to it.

But he would try to resist the temptation. If not for him or Inuyasha, then for Hanabi.

"I understand," Kagome said, and ended the conversation there.

The two stopped speaking for a long while, running out of things to say, and worked on their jewelry. They finished the same, tying the knots together in completion. There weren't many extra shells left, but Kagome threw them back into the water.

She had finished her necklace first, and as Sesshoumaru tied his final knot, she surprised him. She put the necklace down first before leaning back on the side of the plateau, pushing herself up to sit on top of it.

He stared, aware of just how close she was to him. "I…was not aware you could leave the water."

She laughed at the look on his face. "I can, but only if my fin's still in it, and I can't stay up here too long or I'll dehydrate."

"But your friend—"

"Nayida and the others can't even stay above water for very long."

He frowned. He had wondered about this night before as well, but he couldn't come up with a reason to why she was the exception when it came to air exposure. "Then why can you—"

"Here," she interrupted a little too quickly, leaning towards him. At the close proximity, his words died in his throat. He watched as she reached above his head, supporting herself on his shoulder so she could reach his height. When she brought her arms back down, the navy patterns on them sparkling, he looked down to his neck, immediately seeing the seashell necklace she had just been working on.

He was even more surprised when she reached behind him, gathering his silken, damp hair to move out from beneath the necklace, causing him to shiver at the sensation of her fingers through his hair. When it was released, she swept his hair carefully and slowly onto his right shoulder.

"There," she grinned childishly, "a good luck charm. Don't take it off, okay?"

He mentally grinned widely at how close they were becoming, both physically and socially, but he forced the muscles in his face to remain expressionless. He couldn't have known Kagome only said what she did as a test, to see if he would still wear it in the daytime, to see if he was really falling for her like she thought he was. "Never," he swore. And even if she hadn't asked him, he doubted he'd let himself part with it.

"But only," he continued, bringing her wrist closer and only releasing it when she let it float on its own, "if you never remove this." With that, he picked up his cluster of seashells, carefully slipping it onto her wrist as a bracelet. The glimmering seashell he had found earlier, the one shaped like a crescent, dangled from the middle and caught the moonlight magnificently.

Sesshoumaru felled a swell of pride in his chest when he heard her draw in a breath, bringing her wrist closer to examine it. She was clearly stunned at the strangeness of the middle shell, and he couldn't be happier.

"I promise!" she cried happily. "I'll never take it off! It's really gorgeous, Sesshoumaru."

He very nearly smiled back at her, but he remembered his promise to himself. Still, the tiniest slip of a grin got away from him, and although he didn't realize it, Kagome did. And there was something in that smile that made her suddenly ecstatic. The thought of her original plan with Sesshoumaru did not cross her mind in the slightest as she admired just how handsome he looked with an upturned mouth. He really was the best-looking youkai she had seen in a long time.

He turned his head to hers, and there was an unspoken conversation between them. For once, Kagome realized, this demon was easy for her to read. There was something in the way his eyes sparkled that made her appreciate the simple things in life, things like bracelets and necklaces and conversations and the silence that was stretching between them.

A small pulse ran through her fin, and she wanted to groan at the horrible timing.

"Great," she complained, "not again!" She looked at the confused taiyoukai apologetically. "Sorry, Sesshoumaru. I have to go."

"Why?" He did not want her to leave so soon.

"It's hard to explain," she shook her head at him. "Merpeople…can contact other merpeople by sending these thought waves to their tails. My friend's calling me right now. You remember Nayida?" She looked up at him teasingly, and it was clear she had caught him eavesdropping, that night they had "first met". His guilty nod urged her to go on. "So, sorry, but I have to leave now."

"I understand." But he didn't want her to go. "Tomorrow?"

She smiled at his eagerness. "Sure." She slid back into the lake, the bracelet on her wrist glittering, and turned back to him. "Thanks. For my good luck charm, I mean."

"And for mine."

She turned to swim away, but twisted her head around once more. "Remember your promise." She didn't wait for him to agree before diving into the lake, following the pulse to Nayida.

Sesshoumaru sat in his spot, hair still dripping, for a while after she left.

He fingered his necklace and brought it to his lips.

And in the privacy of the field, he smiled.

...

Kagome swam through the water, and it wasn't long before she found her friend. She called out to her, swimming closer and laughing to herself at how pleasantly the night had actually gone, despite who she had for company.

"Nayida!" she called giddily. "You wouldn't _believe_ what just happened!" She wanted to scream it out loud, about how much she learned about her supposed arch-nemesis, and about how he had so easily confessed to her about a number of things, and about how attractive she suddenly realized he was. He had changed right in front of her so quickly, and it excited her to no end.

Nayida, however, did not share that look. She had a stern frown carved into her face, the tiniest hint of a glare in her bright red eyes. "I _know_ what just happened," she spat.

Kagome immediately noticed her friend's uneasiness and stopped in front of her. "Nayida? What's wrong?"

"_You're_ what's wrong!" she cried. "I saw you, _Lady_ _Kagome_." She was stunned, not for Nayida's confession, because she didn't even understand it, but because no one underwater had ever called her by her human name, not even her father. "I saw you!"

"Saw me? What do you mean?"

Nayida glared. "I saw you with that _youkai_."

Kagome just shook her head in confusion. "Huh? Why does that matter? Look, Nayida—"

"It's because you were with him. Above water. On _land_!"

"I don't get it," Kagome scrunched her eyebrows. "Why is that a bad thing?"

"Because," Nayida grit her teeth," he's a demon. You are a mermaid and a human. Three different species do _not_ mix!" She moved her hands wildly around her as she spoke. "You do _not_ come visit us, your underwater friends, because you just want to be with that demon!"

Kagome was beginning to get irritated. She didn't like being accused, especially for no reason. "So what? I don't come down here much because my dad's always looking around for me. I _always_ stay above water, so why are you getting mad at me _now_?"

"Because you're with a _youkai_!" Nayida cried. "Stay away from that monster. It's bad enough demons and humans don't get along, and if you approach him as a mermaid, it won't work either." Her face softened as she closed her eyes and took a deep breath. "I'm your friend, Hanabi. I'm just trying to protect you."

She shook her head again. "Protect me? There's nothing to protect me from."

"Yes, there is. First of all, if your father finds out—"

"He won't," Kagome assured her, "and even if he does, it doesn't matter to me."

"But you have to make your choice eventually, Hanabi," Nayida reminded her. "It'll be harder with a demon like him in your way."

"It's not yet time for my decision," she said, "and I won't worry about it now."

"But that isn't all, Hanabi. That man is a demon, and he is _not_ to be trusted."

Her eyebrows narrowed and she flung her head towards her overreacting friend. "Who says? You don't even know Sesshoumaru!"

"Sesshoumaru?" Nayida raised a brow frustratingly.

"Yeah, _Sesshoumaru_," she said, looking away. "He isn't as dangerous as he seems, and he's…he's my friend. I won't let you or anyone else separate us and destroy our…relationship." She hesitated, her voice faltering, because even though it felt right to say these things, she wasn't used to it. It felt strange, being able to admit these things even though she was keeping so many secrets, especially from Inuyasha. And it hurt, knowing Inuyasha didn't deserve being left in the dark, didn't deserve to be betrayed by her just because it sounded okay saying Sesshoumaru was her _friend_. "I understand it's hard, with me living three lives as a human five hundred years in the future, a miko during the daytime, and a mermaid at night, and with him being a youkai, it's difficult, but that doesn't matter in the end. Not to me."

"It isn't safe," Nayida pushed.

"We don't know that," Kagome whispered. "But I…trust Sesshoumaru, and that's all that matters." She bowed her head in finality. "Now, if you don't mind, Nayida, I'd like to go back up. Sesshoumaru's probably gone by now, and I want to be alone."

That said, she swam away, determined to vent her anger on whatever she could in response to her anti-supportive friend.

Nayida watched her swim away, and her furious expression melted away. "I'm sorry, Kagome," she muttered, "but I need to protect you. I saw you together…and I'm sure of it. You're going to fall for him, and things won't be going as planned."

She turned around and swam away, into the darkness of the lake.

...

A/N: Revised. Wow, this chapter needed A LOT of work. I put it off forEVER because I hated it so much – and still do! My fluff is terrible. d: Plus I'm too lazy to fix certain parts of this. The whole first part was completely cut out (a Sesshoumaru part with all this star/moon symbolism and crap like that…it was terribly corny), and the Sango part was just added in. Sorry if you don't like the mini-plot with her, but it'll eventually coincide with the Kagome/Sesshoumaru storyline so it's pretty important.

I know Sesshoumaru's moko-moko (aka his fluffy thing) is actually a parasite demon or whatever, but I've decided to make it just some clothes-thing. I wouldn't call it a boa, since that just sounds too transvestite-like for Sesshoumaru lmfaooo. And also in the manga, Sesshoumaru's arm exists, so obviously this story is not manga-compliant. Duhhhh.

**Whoever draws me a picture of Sesshoumaru with a floatie and water wings will be my favorite person.  
**


	6. ignorance

...

**the mermaid  
**by mystical spirits

**[ignorance]  
**

"_God gives us our relatives. Thank God we can choose our friends."  
— Ethel Watts Mumford —_

...

Kagome sighed loudly, scooping out a portion of freshly cooked rice, the same rice that Inuyasha and Miroku had unloaded the day before when Inuyasha realized Sesshoumaru's nearby location.

Speaking of which, that damned taiyoukai was causing quite a mess in Kagome's mind right about now. He hadn't done anything to upset her, of course, at least not recently. In fact, he had been the sweetest demon ever for the past few nights, and even the day before when she had caught him playing with the glass lily she gave him, and he had acted so uncharacteristically polite – not that it was a bad thing, because it wasn't.

Still, she feared that although she cherished her so-called "friendship" with Sesshoumaru (though he hadn't specifically said they _were_ friends, and she had just made her judgment on her own, considering the circumstances), such a relationship would cause many problems.

First of all, Kagome hadn't easily forgotten about Nayida's outburst. How could she when Nayida was her dearest friend in Haven? She knew her friend was trying to protect her, but she had made certain accusations that made Kagome's blood boil, though she couldn't explain why.

Nayida's lack of trust in Sesshoumaru was understandable, Kagome could admit, but she still couldn't help but stand up for him, even though she was having certain trust issues with him as well. If she trusted him completely, she wouldn't have a need to keep her identity a secret, after all. But when it came down to it, when she took away the secrets and the awkwardness and her abuse of the power she supposedly had over him, he was still her new friend, whether he or Nayida liked it or not. As a futuristic teenager, she was sometimes selfish, but as a gentle miko, her kind heart welcomed him rather than shunned him for all he was and for all he had done in the past; after realizing just how fragile he really was, she decided she couldn't condemn him for his mistakes.

Sesshoumaru, unlike her, was not innocent, and he had killed and tortured many. Still, he had done things to be proud of, like reviving Rin when he didn't need to bring her human blood back into the world, as well as that annoying little Jaken. He hadn't killed Inuyasha, though surely he was strong enough to easily do so. And, of course, he had his soft side, the one he opened up to "Hanabi".

Which was another problem that revolved around Sesshoumaru. Kagome was hiding her identity from him on purpose, and she was a little ashamed for it, because lying was something that would surely betray his trust in her, if he had it. And the only reason he had even opened up to Hanabi in the first place, Kagome thought, was most likely because she was different (she was a mermaid, after all) and did not seem to be close to Inuyasha. But if she told him who she really was, it would definitely be a problem. But then again, she had never liked lying, although she had to do it from time to time, especially to her modern-day friends when she was "sick". And although she knew she couldn't tell the truth about her identity – not yet – she was uneasy about it, and she wished to just let Sesshoumaru in on her secret.

Kagome couldn't help but feel slightly down at the fact that Sesshoumaru would never like the real her, but easily accepted the mermaid Hanabi, who she had to hide from Inuyasha. Kagome wasn't usually a boastful or cocky person, but her self-esteem decreased when she remembered what happened yesterday, when she, Kagome, spoke to Sesshoumaru, but he ignored her completely, too absorbed in the flower "Hanabi" had given him to pay any attention. Was her real self so unimportant that Sesshoumaru would rather spend time with her when she looked like a fish?

Speaking of which, why did Sesshoumaru like Hanabi in the first place? Everyone knew he was the most cold-hearted demon in the Feudal Era, even icier than Naraku before he was defeated. Sesshoumaru was merciless and powerful, and his racism and sexism, among his other prejudices, were well-known. How was it that a simple mermaid, plain old Hanabi, was able to interest him so much for him to actually be kind to her? He wasn't even as emotionless as usual when he spoke to her, and although he was still not nearly as open as anyone else, he expressed more emotions than before, and Kagome couldn't understand why that was.

The way he had acted was so…strange. She wasn't exactly complaining, having liked his softer, kinder side, but it was difficult to come to terms with how he was able to change so rapidly and suddenly. It was strange how different he was around Hanabi. He had smiled, and his eyes had held the tiniest ounce of warmth, and he had accepted her request to swim together and _make good luck charms_, for heaven's sake! And although she had embraced him first last night, he still moved to hug her back, even if he changed his mind halfway through. If that wasn't enough evidence of Sesshoumaru's change, she didn't know what was.

But he wasn't the only one changing. She herself was becoming someone entirely new when she was around him, and she didn't know if it was because of him or because of her mermaid instincts to make him fall for her. She had even kissed him two nights ago! It had only been for a split second on his cheek, but it was kiss nonetheless, and Kagome couldn't fathom the reason she had done that to Sesshoumaru, the brother of the first and only other person she had ever kissed before in the first place.

She didn't know why she acted so nice to Sesshoumaru at all, actually. It was in her miko nature, of course, and she was always so kind-hearted, but she never would've thought she could get along with him the way she did. If there wasn't that mischievous side of her that wanted him to like her, and if she wasn't still tricking him into thinking she was someone else, she thought he was someone she could possibly grow to like more and more. She remembered how shocked she was that first night they met, but although she was surprised, she had immediately opened herself up to the youkai lord with almost no doubt. She had instantly accepted his presence at the lake and acted as though they had always been the best of friends, but she did not scream, hide, or swim away, despite how worried she was that he would blab about the mermaid he had seen, meaning her. And speaking of which…

Her plan to keep her secret hidden? She found she was starting to care about it less and less.

Why was it so easy to be with him? And why was he so willing to be with her?

Kagome sighed again, her thoughts confusing her to the point where she just felt exhausted (as if getting no sleep at night wasn't bad enough). She couldn't explain any of the questions that were running through her mind, but whenever she was with Sesshoumaru, explanations barely seemed to matter at all. The reasoning was useless, in the end.

And thus, she opted to – at least for now – ignore reason.

"You alright, child?" Kaede watched her with her one good eye before she, like Kagome, ate a mouthful of rice.

"Yeah, I'm fine," she answered after swallowing, though her voice sounded the slightest bit strained.

Kaede shook her head. "You could at least try to sound believable, Kagome."

Kagome smiled warmly as she took another bite, honestly wondering what she should tell Kaede about the past few nights. She was the only person on land, aside from her family in the future, who knew both of Kagome's identities, and she was wise and could most likely give encouraging advice without hesitation. But Sesshoumaru's sudden appearances lately… Telling anyone, even Kaede, could be risky.

"Kaede?" she finally blurted out uneasily. She set down her half-devoured bowl of food and spoke again once the older miko was at full attention. "Is it possible to regenerate parts of the body using our miko powers?" Nervously, she moved her hands to her opposite arm, secretly playing with the bracelet Sesshoumaru had made for her the night before, which was hiding underneath the long sleeve of her high school blouse.

Kaede was obviously shocked at the random question. "Well…yes, of course, but such an act would take plenty of training. Why is it you are interested, Kagome?"

She paused, hesitating. She knew the way she asked Kaede made things a little more obvious then she intended, but she was grateful the older miko, who knew only so much about Sesshoumaru, did not realize what exactly she was talking about, at least not as far as she was aware. Still, she was nervous, the butterflies fluttering in her stomach, and her fingers fidgeted with the bracelet even more frantically.

Kaede could not know. She could _not_ discover Sesshoumaru. If she did, there was a better chance Inuyasha would find out, even if Kaede was definitely able to be trusted. Inuyasha or anyone else could easily overhear any conversation the two mikos would have that concerned the taiyoukai, or if something happened, such as the others worrying about her disappearance, should they wake up in the middle of the night, Kaede could possibly give away everything to console her friends.

No, she would not – _could_ not tell Kaede.

And now that Kagome had made her decision, her paranoia began to pile up inside of her, and she was very self-conscious about her big mouth. What if she accidentally blurted something out that no one else was supposed to know? She bit her lip for a while, anxious by Kaede's questioning glance at her silence, and Kagome, eager to get a straight-out answer and change the subject, put her hands on her knees and clenched her eyes nervously, bowing her head quickly. "Please teach me how to do it!"

The elderly woman could just blink. This was not like Kagome, to beat around the bush like that. Kagome was a calm, trusting girl, but it was extremely clear she was hiding something. She seemed tense on this subject, and her fidgeting made that clear, but Kaede did not know why she would act like that. But she was not stupid, and she knew Kagome had indeed met someone who was in need of a limb. Who it was, she did not know, but she respected Kagome's edginess and protective request – because she, more than anyone else, deserved privacy – and Kaede knew not to ask, not yet.

For now, it would do well to simply ignore reason.

"Alright," she nodded warily, "but be warned that such an incredible skill is not so easy. If you are willing, however, Kagome, I shall do my best in training you." She smiled motherly to try calming the young girl down, which she began to do once Kaede had agreed.

"Of course!" she chirped, a relaxed grin beginning to form, though she still watched herself carefully as to not give anything away. She got what she wanted, both the information and the promise of training. If she started her training now, maybe she would be able to help Sesshoumaru even sooner, if he wanted the help in the first place. "Arigatou gozaimasu!"

Kaede just nodded in response, going back to her rice and gesturing Kagome to do the same. She was still unsure as to why Kagome was acting this way, but she stayed silent on the matter. Instead, she changed the subject, or at least, she believed she did.

"How has it been on the other side of the barrier?"

Kagome stiffened just enough for the one-eyed miko to notice, though she said nothing about it. "Fine. I've been mostly just…swimming around, you know."

Her answer was a puzzled glance. "Yes, I would expect so, being what you are."

"Oh, right," Kagome blushed, her chopsticks moving toward her mouth again. "Well, uh, it's been fine."

"Has it been boring all alone at night?"

Kagome could only fidget in her seat, nibbling her lip in her habit of nervousness. She had never really been _alone_ these past few nights, except for the first night of her return. "No, I've had fun. I had to visit my dad again, though." She purposely steered their topic elsewhere, although as soon as she mentioned it, she mentally berated herself for bringing up her _father_.

"Oh? And how was the meeting this time?"

"Not good," she shrugged, "but I shouldn't be expecting anything otherwise."

Kaede frowned. "You should give him a chance, Kagome. He may want to start over again. You never know."

"Nah, I know well enough," she shook her head, putting her half-empty bowl down beside her, chopsticks placed next to them. "I mean, that's true, that I have to see his side of things in order to know what I'm doing, but he acted just the same as always, so I don't think he's exactly planning on patching things up yet." She shrugged. "Even now he doesn't seem to be making any effort to help me with my decision. It's almost time to make it, you know, and I still don't know what to do."

"It is a hard choice to make, but I am certain you shall decide wisely."

She smiled. Kaede was the only one in this time and above water who knew of the decision. Everyone below the lake was aware of this as well, and they were all also aware of Kagome's hesitation, which they accepted, considering they all seemed to know what the final answer was going to be already. It was not time for her yet, but the clock was ticking, and Kagome was fully aware that she needed to start thinking about the choice.

It should have been an easy decision to make, but she was still hesitant. Things were not as they seemed, and she was dreading the day when she had to make up her mind. It _wasn't_ easy, not at all. Once the question was asked to her, she had immediately come up with a straight answer, but when she thought about it more and more, she knew it wasn't going to be an easy decision after all. She was already beginning to think about it, though the time was not quite right yet, and there were many things to be done first, but once she had brought up the topic, she zoned out, her uncertainty puzzling her into silence.

She did not notice how many minutes had passed, nor how Kaede's rice bowl was suddenly void of any remaining grains, and she did not notice that the sun had risen higher and they were no longer alone.

"I still don't know what to do," she sighed after a long pause, not paying attention as Kaede began filling a new bowl of steaming rice, which happened to be for the new presence's breakfast.

"About what?" a sleepy voice cut in.

Kagome jumped in surprise, swerving her head so fast she nearly felt a whiplash, looking behind her at the intruder. "It's nothing. Ohayo, Inuyasha."

He startled her, that much was obvious, and Kagome couldn't stop the blush that colored her cheeks, one shade for the fact that Inuyasha had made her jump when all he had done was come into the room for food, and the other shade because she did not know how much time had passed since she and Kaede's conversation ended.

What if he had come in as they were talking about her time behind the barrier? And what about Her Choice? What if he came in at the wrong time and heard something he was not supposed to?

But he hadn't, apparently. If he had, things would have been a bit…loud at the moment. Still, the chance Inuyasha could have overheard their conversation put her on edge, and her uneasiness rose no matter how hard she tried to urge it down.

_Don't be silly, Kagome_, she scolded herself, _you're overreacting. There's no way anyone can find out about Sesshoumaru, not unless you continue acting like a bumbling idiot._

Gulping, Kagome managed a smile at Inuyasha, following her "good morning".

"If it was nothing, you wouldn't be looking so stupid," he gave her a side-glance.

She glared back up at him uneasily. "Well, I didn't ask you to be so nosy!"

"You're the one who said it right in front of me, idiot!"

"That doesn't mean—"

"Yeah, whatever," the hanyou shrugged, interrupting her and walking towards Kaede, who was holding out the rice and chopsticks she had just put together for him as Kagome mentally beat herself to a pulp. _Stupid Kagome! Stupid, stupid, stupid! Why can't you just keep your mouth shut?_ If she kept getting so touchy, he was bound to notice something was wrong with her sooner or later. She was at least relieved he didn't seem to notice her mental restlessness _yet_, or so she thought.

Inuyasha noticed clearly. He was just being kind enough to not mention it yet; it was too early. Besides, just because he was a hanyou, it didn't mean he couldn't smell Kagome's unease as well as he did.

He was about to comment about it, though, like his usual outspoken self, but one look at Kaede shaking her head as she handed him his breakfast shut him up. He could make fun of her later in the day, if she was being lazy – not that she ever was, compared to him. It didn't matter. Knowing Inuyasha, he was obviously going to bring Kagome's twitchiness up eventually.

But as far as he knew, there wasn't a reason to be so nervous in the first place. Unless…it couldn't be _him_, could it? After all, the smell of her anxiousness was what woke him up in the first place. It may have gotten worse once he showed up behind her, but he passed it off as his voice spooking her a bit. But her guard should have been up. He never scared her every other morning once he woke up.

Needless to say, Inuyasha was a bit concerned. He cared a lot for Kagome, that much was palpable, but he couldn't be sure if her discomfort was anything to be worried about at all. All the same, he was hoping she was alright, but the scent of her restlessness wasn't dying out as quickly as he hoped, and Kaede's gesture to leave her alone didn't exactly settle him to well.

But he would just ignore reason.

Taking his first mouthful of rice, Inuyasha shrugged to himself. If Kagome was in a tight spot, she'd either find her way out of it or get help. She was a smart and responsible girl, not that he would admit that out loud anytime soon. That much was enough to console him into a comfortable mood.

"So, Inuyasha," Kagome broke the silence, trying to ease away her discomfort, "what are we doing today?"

The hanyou paused in his vigorous eating skills – or as Kagome called them, terrible table manners – but he soon resumed his task of shoveling food inside of him. "Actually," he said, his mouth full, but his tone more serious than Kagome was used to this early in the morning, "there's something I have to do first, before we get started on whatever work Kaede makes us do."

He ignored the look the older miko threw at him and swallowed his rice. Usually, he would make it a point to go shard-hunting, even with Sango and Kirara not present, but Kagome, Miroku, and Shippou constantly protested for a few days rest while they had the chance, and they opted to help Kaede with her chores instead. Inuyasha gave in after a small argument and four "osuwari"s later, but he was still rather peeved that the search for the Shikon shards was put on hold while Sango mourned miles away.

Because of Inuyasha's persistence to search for the shards, Kagome was confused at his lack of annoyance this morning. What had come up for Inuyasha to become distracted from his ambition?

It couldn't be Kikyou, like Kagome would have thought before Naraku was defeated, for she was dragged to the afterlife along with him, although she died peacefully with Inuyasha by her side, and Naraku's demise was rather drastic and not as cute. Now with her own spirit completely back inside of her, and the talent Kikyou held within their shared soul now passed onto her, Kagome was stumped at why Inuyasha was distracted.

_Stop complaining, Kagome,_ she told herself again_. He's finally off your back about hunting for those shards, so be grateful!_

And she was, so she did her best to push it past her, just as she did with her nervousness that still lingered in her belly.

She would just ignore reason.

"Okay," Kagome agreed to Inuyasha's silent proposition, smiling at Miroku, who had just entered the hut without her being completely aware of him; she supposed Shippou and Myouga were still resting somewhere.

She handed the young monk a new portion of rice, and breakfast was resumed.

...

He liked her – a lot – and he couldn't even explain why.

Sesshoumaru sighed softly, his hidden mix of distress and happiness thankfully unnoticed by his wards.

He couldn't get Hanabi out of his head.

It had only been a few hours since he had last seen her. She left early again, to his displeasure; he had wanted to be with her longer. He had yet to spend a whole night with her, at her side, other than the first night he discovered her, which didn't count since she did not notice his presence at the time.

But now they were both perfectly aware of each other, and Sesshoumaru could not help but grow frustrated with that Nayida girl, the one who continued to interrupt his precious moments with Hanabi. He spent little to no time with her, when it all came down to it, and Sesshoumaru was aggravated. At the same time, though, he was filled with delight and invisible smiles as he remembered his moments with the pretty mermaid.

How she smiled so brightly at him, showing that he matter to her; how she laughed for him because he could not lower himself to do so, although in her presence; how she understood, comforted, and, most of all, accepted him for his lack of a left arm without him even asking her to.

She was a magnificent being, and his heart beat fasted at every thought of her. Even now, he could feel the organ pumping and swelling in his chest. He had blushed – _blushed _– because of her. He had gained a new view of the Tetsusaiga and Tenseiga after she spoke with him about the swords. He had felt such painful, pleasurable emotions running through his veins because she plagued his every thought.

He was pleased at this fact. He enjoyed thinking of her and remembering their moments together for the past few nights. The glass lily she had given him two nights before was kept safely in his pocket, and he would run a clawed finger across the perfect petals every now and then. Her handmade good luck necklace was still draped around his neck, but hiding beneath both his inner and outer haori, as well as his spiked armor, so Rin and Jaken would not see or ask about it.

Sesshoumaru had, after only four nights, grown rather fond of the mermaid, and he could not stop thinking of her, not like he wanted to in the first place. He could not help but want to embrace her again, to feel her lips on his cheek again, to _be_ with her again.

But the problem was: he wasn't _supposed_ to want these things.

Every night, he grew restless until he could be with her again, and once they were together, he was finally subdued. However, every morning and afternoon, he berated himself countless times for ever even beginning to fall for the enigma that was Hanabi.

All reasoning explained to Sesshoumaru that all of this was wrong. She was a mermaid, he was a demon. She had a fin, he had legs. She was able to love, and he was only able to crave.

But as they always said: opposites attract.

All the same, Sesshoumaru knew this was wrong. He was the taiyoukai of the Western Lands, and he was betraying all he was and stood for. He detested the female population in general, and now he had seen one who had captivated him so suddenly, and he could not help but allow the feelings she had stirred inside of him to flow and overcome his icy demeanor.

He was supposed to be cold and cruel, but when he was around her – when he _thought _of her – he wanted to be understand, like she was. He wanted to impress her with the kindness he never had, and he wanted to prove to her that he wasn't the stoic, cruel youkai everyone believed him to be.

But it was not simply that everyone believed him to be like that. He knew himself that he _was_ a cold-hearted demon, and that his lack of love for another being doomed him to a life of loneliness.

But his loneliness was subdued when he was with Hanabi. She stirred up these emotions within him, and she had silently offered her companionship, convincing him she would be there for him at all times. She would put an end to his loneliness because she wanted to be with him almost as much as he wished to be with her, he believed. Throughout all his centuries of life, Sesshoumaru had been lonely, but up until now, he had never admitted it. He had never needed anyone to make him feel deserving, and he never craved for a companion to confide in, one reason he took on his wards.

Speaking of them, Rin was the one who had begun to melt his cold exterior with her childlike innocence. She had allowed him to see how his ruthless killing of innocent people, despite them being humans, was wrong, to a certain extent. Although Rin had not said it out loud, Sesshoumaru began to understand. He opened his eyes to such insight, although he did not always follow it, and, at times, killed who he needed to, including innocent people.

But now Hanabi had come in.

The understanding Rin had given him was mediocre, and it could not give Sesshoumaru as much awareness as he needed. Rin was just a child, and the changes she ignited in him were the changes he needed to act more fatherly toward her. She had given him the happy and caring childhood he had never been able to have on his own. Because Rin's lessons for Sesshoumaru were based on childlike memories, he had changed on a little, accepting the human girl, but he had not come even close to accepting all humans, nor all females, and before he met Hanabi, he was content with knowing only so much.

But now that the mermaid had come into his life, he was learning even more lifelong lessons at a rapid pace. Hanabi was teaching him, unbeknownst to her, how to relax, how to have fun, and how to be more open. She had shown him how to see things from different points of view, as well as how to be comfortable and not as stiff as usual. She had taught him he was not as alone as he seemed, and that he indeed had a friend.

All in all, she was the perfect being for Sesshoumaru to be around. She was improving the faults he didn't even know he had, but at the same time, he did not change very drastically and was able to keep his characteristic traits. She was already beginning to change him, but at the same time, he was not changing at all. All of this was happening over the span of four nights.

But Sesshoumaru's mental obsession of Hanabi was not an all-around pleasant thing. While the pretty mermaid had already begun to spin a web of emotions in him, causing him to react as he did, his carnal pleasures made him uneasy.

He was simply not used to this kind of attention from…anyone, other than Rin and Jaken, of course, and even they could only do so much for him. But he was cold and stoic, and no one was supposed to make him feel this way, and no one was supposed to feel for him in any other way than fear or frustration.

He was almost entirely _obsessed_ with her, and it was all her fault. Surely this was unhealthy. Myouga had confirmed his very false suspicions of Hanabi casting a spell on him, but Sesshoumaru could still not be so sure. After only four nights, the mermaid had plagued herself in his thoughts, and everything about her made him crave more. She had practically made him bow down to her, and his desire for her twisted his heart until it hurt. Never before had Sesshoumaru even dreams of succumbing to a girl, let alone so easily when he had only known Hanabi for a few days. But now he couldn't get her out of his head, and his body craved for the chance to be near her again; to see her again; to feel her touch again.

He thought he may just be getting ill, but that was before he remembered that, as a youkai, he couldn't get sick; but he could not fathom any reason as to why he could be submitting to Hanabi like he was.

What was so special about her? Well, it was a silly question, but Sesshoumaru was running out of reasons to explain his mental, physical, and social lust for the mermaid.

He was about to think more on this matter, but the wind blew from the north, and Inuyasha's scent surrounded Sesshoumaru's sensitive nose. He did not know why, but his half-brother's scent was coming closer and closer as each second passed, and Sesshoumaru was curious as to why he would be confronting him, alone, at this particular moment.

But the taiyoukai was calm and continued to sit underneath the very same tree Inuyasha had discovered him under the day before, and he awaited his brother's presence.

For the moment, Sesshoumaru would have to shrug back his thoughts of Hanabi. He was going through inner turmoil because of her, but his attraction was slowly beginning to conquer him completely. Even now, with Inuyasha sprinting towards his figure, Sesshoumaru could feel his heart thumping against his chest at the reminder of her.

But he would have to think about this later. He was at odd ends with his mind and instincts, but for now…

Until Inuyasha left, he would have to ignore reason.

...

Inuyasha rushed through the forest, jumping on tree branches for leverage. He hoped Sesshoumaru was still where he found him the day before, because he still couldn't seem to track down his brother's scent. He cursed him for being a taiyoukai: his skill at masking his scent was really beginning to get on his nerves.

Passing the Bone-Eater's Well, Inuyasha quickened his pace.

He had waited until Miroku, Myouga, and Shippou were fully awake and they, along with Kagome, were preoccupied with Kaede's chores before he told them he had something to take care of first. Kagome, already aware he had plans for the morning, immediately agreed at his announcement, shocking the other four of their friends (including Kaede), who expected Kagome to "sit" him for trying to get out of any work.

Inuyasha scoffed, still running through the thick forest. When he was leaving, he heard Kagome telling them they didn't need to look for jewel shards today, and Shippou had cheered happily at the hanyou's lack of stubbornness today.

_Whatever_, Inuyasha thought to himself smugly. _If those guys think we're going to be sitting around here for the next two weeks, they've got another thing coming._

A few moments later, Inuyasha found himself near the edge of the clearing he remembered from yesterday. He added a boost of speed to his already quick pace, and barging into the clearing loudly, he noticed Sesshoumaru in the exact same position he was in the day before, under the same exact tree, not even acknowledging Inuyasha's presence.

The girl and the imp, Jaken, jumped in surprise and grew quiet, but they did not seem scared of him in the slightest.

Jaken, however, grew fussy, breaking the silence as Rin stood beside Ah-Uhn. "Inuyasha!" the green toad-like creature squawked. "What are you doing here? How dare you intrude Lord Sesshoumaru's rest! Remove yourself from the premises! You're presence is unnecessary! My lord does not wish for you to–"

"Shut up, you slimy toad!" Inuyasha cried out, annoyed. "I came to talk with that damn Sesshoumaru, not you."

Sesshoumaru remained silent for a second or two, but he soon replied, still not looking at Inuyasha. "If you wish to speak, then do so, but do so quickly. I have no time for petty conversation."

Inuyasha huffed, glaring at his half-brother. _Who does he think he is, acting all high and mighty like that?_ "If that's the case, then shut up and listen, Sesshoumaru."

At this, the taiyoukai finally made eye contact, gold clashing with gold. "Do not believe you are in the position to order me about, Inuyasha," his eyes narrowed. "I have given you permission to speak. If you are not going to make your point, I suggest you leave."

Inuyasha's glare intensified. Their sibling rivalry was still great, despite the fact that they hadn't drawn their weapons yet, as Tetsusaiga was sheathed, and Toukijin lay beside Ah-Uhn's feet.

"Listen, Sesshoumaru," he said angrily, trying to calm himself so an unnecessary fight would not break out, "I just came to ask you what you're doing here. Last time, my friends dragged me away before you could answer properly."

"I have already told you, Inuyasha," Sesshoumaru said calmly, "that it is none of your business. My attendance here does not concern you."

"Liar!" Inuyasha accused. "No way in hell did you just feel like taking a walk here just to sit under that damn tree of yours!"

Sesshoumaru glared amber. "That is correct, I did not. However, my purpose of being here has nothing to do with you, and I have no right to explain to you."

Jaken looked as though he was about to say something in protest to what Sesshoumaru replied, but one look at his lord's warning glare shut him up, and Inuyasha wondered what that was all about, although he said nothing of it.

"You _have_ a right to explain to me," he said instead, "because this is _my_ forest, and that's _our_ village. _You're_ the one intruding! This is my turf, and you ain't welcome here!"

"Your welcome matters not to me," Sesshoumaru replied smoothly. "As I have said before, I am not here because of you."

"Then why are you here?" Inuyasha cried, leaning forward in his frustrated rage.

Sesshoumaru's eye nearly twitched at Inuyasha's annoyance and gave in, not wanting to deal with his presence any longer. "If you must know, Inuyasha," he said from behind his sparkling fangs, "I am here simply because I wish to be, and because I await a meeting with another."

Inuyasha looked shell-shocked that he actually given him what he wanted: an answer. "A _meeting_?" he cried out incredulously. "With who?"

Sesshoumaru turned away, moving back into his calm position. "It is none of your business. Your question has been answered. This conversation is over."

Inuyasha opened his mouth to speak but was interrupted. "That's right, half-breed!" Jaken cried out again. "My lord has dismissed you! He has made it clear it is time for you to leave!"

"Shut up, you little imp!" Inuyasha moved his glare to Jaken. "No one asked you!"

"Inuyasha," Sesshoumaru spat out, "leave."

Inuyasha threw him another heated glare, but his brother seemed unaffected by it. After a moment of silence, he gave in, his anger swelling all the same. "Fine," he surrendered, "but don't think this is the end of it, Sesshoumaru! If you go anywhere near our village, I'll kill you!"

Sesshoumaru scoffed, "I highly doubt that."

A growl emitted from behind Inuyasha's fangs. "Shut up! Just stay the hell away from us, got it?"

"Fine."

"Fine!"

Rin giggled softly at their obvious childlike banter. Even she picked up the immature aura in this clearing. Ah-Uhn looked as though they would roll their eyes anytime soon.

A short moment of stillness passed before Inuyasha finally turned around and sprinted back to camp, throwing a glare over his red-clad shoulder.

The whole meeting seemed almost pointless to him, now that he thought about it, but at least it wasn't completely in vain. Now he had Sesshoumaru's word that he would stay away from he and his friends, as well as their village, not to mention that now Inuyasha was aware there was someone Sesshoumaru was meeting with.

But why here? Why would Sesshoumaru have a rendezvous here of all places? Things did not seem right…

Inuyasha wasn't stupid, despite what others believed. He saw how Sesshoumaru was reacting to his protests and loud arguments. Inuyasha never remembered another time in which Sesshoumaru grew so angry so quickly.

He seemed more boisterous than ever before, although he remained impassive at the same time. He was easily fed up with Inuyasha, and he slouched a bit more in his sitting position, which was both good and bad. While it seemed as though his aniki was finally loosening up a bit, Inuyasha was utterly confused. It was strange for him to be acting like that. Something was amiss. Since when was Sesshoumaru relaxed? What made him act that way?

Inuyasha shook his head, soon at the edge of the forest and by the village fields. It was probably nothing. He was most likely just over-analyzing things for once. Sesshoumaru, relaxed? Nah!

Huffily making his way back to the village where his friends were toiling away without him, Inuyasha shrugged off the matter.

And he ignored reason.

...

A/N: Another one revised! Almost finished! I know most of this chapter is pretty much filler, and I'm sorry to disappoint, but I feel it's pretty important to know how everyone's currently feeling in the story. I hate when characters fall in love or whatever REALLYSUPERFAST, you know? So hopefully this chapter explains things a little more.

And so you know: Kagome's supposed to be wearing her high school uniform now, not her middle school one from during the actual series. Hollerrrr.


	7. lessons

...

**the mermaid  
**by mystical spirits

**[lessons]**

"_Arguing with a fool proves there are two."  
— Doris M. Smith —_

...

Kagome sighed heavily, pausing for a single moment to wipe the putrid, sticky sweat from her brow. She winced up at the burning sun, groaning mentally – she did not have the energy to do it out loud – as she realized there was not a single bit of shade in her general vicinity. Her long sleeves were already rolled up to her shoulders by her grubby hands, her hair tied high on top of her head. She had long ago rid her feet of her socks and shoes, and they were now bare and muddy from her previous chore of planting rice, one that exhausted her quickly because she really, _really_ needed to learn how to stay in shape.

She stared at the unscathed wooden training pole in front of her, panting with fatigue as her hands' pink glow began to fade away. She muttered a quick curse under her breath, beginning to panic at the lack of energy she was creating. She pushed herself, her hands glowing suddenly with a burst of light before dying out soon afterward.

"Do not overdo it," Kaede ordered calmly without even breaking a sweat, and Kagome wondered if she was seriously the only one around who could feel how hot it was. "Take your time and relax."

Kagome just sighed again. She had asked Kaede herself to help train her so she could be strong enough to help Sesshoumaru regenerate his arm, but she had no idea it would be so difficult, not to mention tiring. This bit of training in itself was supposed to test the strength and control of her miko abilities, and if she succeeded in performing this technique, she could use it in an offensive battle. But just how was she supposed to master this skill if she was so damn exhausted?

Planting rice to begin with was a heavy task, one she insisted she could do alone, despite Inuyasha's protests (he had since returned from wherever he was that morning, but he hadn't told her a thing about what he was doing exactly). She was not physically strong, and she tired easily. She had hoped it would be a nice start to discipline her work ethic by doing her own planting in the fields, but she was beginning to wonder if she maybe started a little too big.

Whether the pressure on herself worked or not, she couldn't say. In fact, she couldn't say much at all, considering the state she was in. She talked Kaede into training her already – and immediately after her planting of rice – and she had to force herself to remember her personal goal in order to not regret asking Kaede in the first place.

She tried again, closing her eyes and focusing her ki to move into her right palm. It was a slow process, but a successful one that tickled her skin with the movement of her miko energy coursing through her veins. Her fingertips twitched at the familiar warmth gathering there, and although her eyes were shut calmly, she could still feel the pink color. It was a strange feeling she had somehow grown accustomed to, but it was something so difficult to explain, even in her head, that the only words describing it was that she was _feeling a color_.

"That's it," Kaede muttered loudly enough for Kagome to hear through her focused state. "That's it…"

With the encouraging words from the elder miko, Kagome concentrated, the glowing light in her hand growing steadily to the size of a tennis ball. _Just a bit more_, she thought to herself, sending out a sort of mental wave into her arm, causing the light to grow even larger. She continued to pant with exhaustion, but her task was near completion, and the pink blaze had almost filled her entire palm.

"That's it!" Kaede's proud smile was mirrored in her voice. "Go on, now."

Her eyes snapped open, but her lack of physical energy made them droop soon after. She began to walk, one foot slowly passing the other in a weak step, but she refused to give up now. Her paced steps sped up as she moved along, and they continued to quicken until she was nearly sprinting with anticipation. Her panting grew heavier as she willed herself to keep going, hoping the ball of light in her hand would stay strong for just a little while longer.

She was nearing the six-foot Muk Yan Jong protruding from the dirt ground, and she was hurrying towards it rapidly. Just yards away from it, she lifted her glowing hand behind her head, running faster and faster and preparing herself for the impact with the wood in front of her. She positioned herself, just about to come in contact with the training pole, and then—

She stepped on a rock.

She stumbled, the annoyingly painful jabs into her bare foot distracting her and pissing her off to no end, and although her miko energy had successfully barged into the vertical log right in front of her, her power was not enough because of her stagger. She looked up slowly, scowling at her injured foot as her ki quickly evaporated from her palm and disappeared altogether, and the sight before her made her look down all over again.

The dent in the log was not even the size of a golf ball. In fact, it was barely even the size of a _gum_ball. And it was not particularly deep, either.

She cried out frustratingly. All that time and energy, all that sweat and hard work, and she had barely done a thing, thanks to her little slip-up and that damn rock!

Kaede came up behind her, placing a hand on her shoulder. "Do not worry, Kagome. You have worked much too hard today. Perhaps it is time to stop for now."

"No!" she cried immediately, barely leaving a paused between Kaede's words and her own. She had to master her powers before the next week and a half were up! Once Sango returned, she knew they would all have to leave to hunt for the Shikon shards, and Sesshoumaru would be long gone. She needed to learn these skills as soon as possible or she would _never_ be able to help the taiyoukai, no matter how strange it sounded.

"Kagome, take a rest. Perhaps you should return to your time for a while and relax."

"No!" She sat on her knees, her hands on the ground in front of her, and she looked up at Kaede. "I haven't reached my limit yet! I can do it again, you just watch!" She began to stand up, struggling quite a bit, considering she was still drained and it was only just past noon, which was the hottest point of the day.

"Kagome," the elder miko said again, "you have no more energy in you. You will most likely not recover until much later tonight, when you will be…preoccupied. I suggest you go home and bathe, and I will speak to Inuyasha about letting you rest for the remainder of the day."

"But the work—" Kagome looked up, horrified and still trying to stand.

"The work will be taken care of." Kaede bent down, holding out a hand for Kagome to grab onto. The younger priestess refused it and pushed herself to the near limit in order to stand on her own, which she finally accomplished, though she looked like she would topple all over again if the wind would just blow a little stronger.

"Inuyasha won't be—"

"I shall speak with him."

Kagome sighed loudly, giving in very reluctantly. She nodded carefully to avoid any oncoming headaches, and began to walk back to the village, stumbling with fatigue. Kaede followed, stepping in front of her so she would stop. Bringing her hand to Kagome's forehead, she focused her own invisible ki to mesh with Kagome's own pink and dwindling one, supplying the tiniest bit of energy in her, enough so she could walk on her own.

"Thanks, Kaede," Kagome smiled weakly, not completely amazed at the action, as she could also perform that same technique herself. She had learned _some_ skills over the last two years, but it was the difficult ones she wished to master.

"Come along, Kagome," Kaede suggested quietly, and the trainee followed her temporary shishou without complaint.

...

Sesshoumaru stood from his current spot at the base of the tree, thoughts of Hanabi swimming through his head, no pun intended (because Sesshoumaru _did not_ joke, after all). That wretched girl, plaguing him like she was!

Jaken and Rin watched him as he moved for the first time in hours, since the reappearance of Inuyasha, to be exact. Ah-Uhn still slept, basking in the warmth of the sun shining through the treetops.

Sesshoumaru blinked slowly, wanting to shake himself so he could be rid of his thoughts of that vixen of a mermaid. She would _not_ be on his mind any further, he decided. Whatever it took to think of something else for a change would be welcome to him.

He turned away from his wards, walking away in his usual paced tempo. He needed to get out of here, away from this area where he was caught stroking that lily of hers and where Inuyasha learned a bit about her. He refused to think about it. He refused to be reminded of her.

"My lord!" Jaken screeched. "Where are you going?"

"Silence, Jaken."

"Yes, my lord!"

Jaken began to pick up Ah-Uhn's reins, Rin watching and waiting, but Sesshoumaru's words cut them short.

"Stay here."

The others watched his back disappear, staring at him innocently until his form was out of view completely. Sesshoumaru was aware of their gaze, but it did not unnerve him. His mind was too preoccupied with his frustrations, he did not bother to care.

_Hanabi._

No, she was not to be thought of! She was not to be puzzled about any longer, and she was not to be obsessed about. He was not supposed to look forward to their meeting tonight, and she was not supposed to make him feel so inferior just by smiling at him. That lily in his pocket and the handmade necklace hidden beneath his armor were just ordinary tokens, nothing special.

He was not sure what he despised most: the frustrating and new feelings stirring inside him, or the way he thought he could lie to himself in the first place.

He stared into space without paying attention to where he was going, no thanks to his obnoxious thoughts, and he had walked for over a quarter of an hour by the time he realized where he was.

He could see a clearing straight ahead. It was _the_ clearing, the one where he disappeared to for the past three nights – four, if he counted tonight. He had tried before, and there was no use trying again: the barrier that led him to the lake was nonexistent during the daytime.

All the same, he growled at the irony of it. He had walked to escape his thoughts of Hanabi, yet he had subconsciously brought himself to the very place where he first spotted her.

He turned to leave and walk away from the dreadful place, but a scent lingered on his sensitive nose, and he was surprised of how long it took for him to catch it. It was Inuyasha's wench again. Was it not enough that he had to be bothered by her and her companions just yesterday? She was a nuisance, he had decided throughout the time span in which he knew she existed.

His gaze intensified in concentration as he remembered that first time he came to this clearing, before he had seen Hanabi. He had detected that girl's scent nearby, her presence disappearing from somewhere in this clearing. Perhaps she came here often?

His delicate and pointed ears picked up the sound of rustling paper. Paper? Why would the miko have paper, unless it was some sort of sutra? But something was off, he noted. He was aware of the sound of such paper, considering all the books and scrolls in his father's old library, not to mention the sutras present in all the futile missions to exorcise him, but the sound of this paper was…strange. It did not sound the same, but it was paper nonetheless.

Curious, Sesshoumaru brought himself closer to the edge of the clearing, hearing the sound again not long after. He came closer and closer to it, the miko's undeniable scent becoming clearer to his clouded senses.

He took one last step, bringing his body next to a tree just in view of the girl. His golden eyes widened minutely at the sight of her. He was not surprised by her looks, as she seemed exactly the same as always, in those strange and degrading clothes of hers. He was not surprised that she was alone, knowing his irritable half-brother. He was, rather, surprised at what she held in her hands:

A book.

The girl was _reading_ a book!

How was that possible? How was such a common and vulgar girl capable of reading such a thick text? She looked calm reading it, and so very used to it. She did not seem overly-captivated by the story, and it was as though she had read many such things before.

Sesshoumaru was aware of the limits of education for both humans and demons. Both could read simple things, such as prices and a few words written on signs, but very few of each could easily and effortlessly be able to read sentences of kanji and be able to understand them, let alone an entire book. And so casually, she was reading it!

The girl turned the page, not yet noticing his presence so close to her. She was really a very ridiculous miko, not even noticing him. He wouldn't be surprised if she was attacked and killed without her even realizing it, but it was not something he worried himself over; as far as he was concerned, there would be one less human in the world if that happened.

Listening again to the sound of the turning page, his eyes narrowed in suspicion and confusion. The pages were not made of the same rice paper he was accustomed to. They looked smoother and less yellow; they were a genuine white, and the kanji was written with such a precision that each stroke was not smeared, but, rather, perfectly written. The ink did not look like the kind he had seen either, and not a single bit of the book's words looked like they had been written with a brush; not even the thinnest of them could have written such small kanji.

The girl sighed, pausing in her reading to take a breather and look around. It was awhile before she looked in his direction, but once she did, she made a double-take, her eyes widening significantly. She blinked a few times, as though trying to make certain he was really there, but even when reality seemed to crash on her, she did not run or cry out for Inuyasha, something that rather startled Sesshoumaru.

The entire time she watched him, he remained still and stoic, only moving to look down at her once she regained composure.

She gaped for a few more seconds – looking even more ridiculous than usual, he mentally added – before quietly forming the words she struggled to speak.

"Sesshoumaru," she said calmly, although still utterly shocked, "what the hell are you doing here?"

...

Kagome mentally praised herself for not stuttering, like she thought she would, but also wished she hadn't blurted it out the way she had. Her bad mouth was probably just reminding him why he hated humans so much. Whoops.

But honestly, she thought as she blushed from his disapproving look at her, what on_ earth_ was Sesshoumaru doing there? Surely he was much too busy to bother himself with someone like _her_.

She had come here to this familiar clearing in hopes for silence and relaxation, once she had finished bathing and had grabbed an easy-to-read book from her shelf; she was still completely exhausted from her earlier training, and she refused to read something complicated. Speaking of which, she was so tired that she had not even sensed Sesshoumaru's presence. It would not do, she realized, for her to be so clueless while by herself and surrounded in a youkai-filled area.

Kagome blinked at Sesshoumaru's lack of response. He said nothing, but instead moved closer slowly – albeit with long strides – staring at the book in her hands all the while. Kagome fidgeted, still sitting in the grass. If this wasn't awkward, she didn't know what was. She couldn't _stand_ such tension.

"Well, what is it?" she bit out rudely, a bit frustrated under his scrutinizing gaze. She immediately tensed, her eyes widening as she grit her teeth. _Idiot,_ she thought to herself. _He's going to crush me!_

She looked up at him, catching his heated glare. He did not respond to her impolite words, opting to move his gaze back to the open book in her hands yet again.

"Read it."

Kagome blinked up at him, her uneasy face settling to one of confusion. "What, out _loud_?" Sesshoumaru glared again, and she regretted her words for the third time in a row. "Uh, I mean…yeah, sure!" She stammered a bit, shaking her head and clearing her throat nervously. _You would think he would be easy to remain calm in front of, considering all that's happened between us these past few nights._

"Uh, let's see…" she muttered to herself again, trying to find the beginning of a sentence, aware of the taiyoukai's stare as he read the kanji himself – and upside-down, no less – as he stood in front of her. He seemed to be _checking _if she was reading correctly, the insufferable demon.

Clearing her throat one last time, she read aloud. Her voice was smooth and clear, and she only hesitated when her tongue got tangled and she slipped up her words a little (it was hard _not_ to slip up with a gorgeous, scary demon hovering over her shoulder). All her years in reciting textbooks during school had taught her how to be efficient in her literary skills.

She finished a sentence and paused to swallow, but when she opened her mouth again to continue, she only got a word or two out before she was interrupted. And she had only read about two paragraphs, too!

"That's quite enough, Miko." Sesshoumaru's words were sharp and annoyed, successfully halting Kagome in her smooth reciting. He seemed bothered, as though the thought of her reading in general was ridiculous, and that she was tricking him somehow by doing what he asked her to do in the first place.

Kagome couldn't stop the glare she directed at him. "Hey, _you're_ the one who asked me to read, and I've done it. You don't have to be so rude about it!"

Sesshoumaru scowled at her, baring his fangs as he lifted a dangerous and clawed hand. He grabbed the collar of her shirt, roughly forcing her to stand, the book grasped by her fingers. He brought her close and glowered at her before pushing her away and looking back down to the book.

Kagome had to catch her breath after being handled the way she was, and she rubbed the base of her throat, irritated and making it very clear that she was so. Sesshoumaru paid her no mind, but instead flipped to another random page, successfully losing her place in the book, and pointed at a spot, silently commanding that she read it.

"Uggh!" she growled at him, shoving his hand away from her precious text. He growled himself, in response, his eyes flashing dangerously. Kagome blinked nervously, catching that she was being just as rude as he was, and that he would possibly kill her if she didn't just shut up and do what she was told. All the same, she hated being forced into obedience, especially by someone who was acting as spoiled as that ruddy Sesshoumaru was.

She never would have guessed that such a kind, gentle demon that spoke to "Hanabi" would suddenly transform during the daytime, as she did, into someone so impolite and infuriating. But what could she do about him? What choice did she have now?

She began to read once again.

...

Sesshoumaru clenched his fists beside him, thanks to the troublesome girl in front of him. She was entirely frustrating. If she could just obey her superiors and read that damn book of hers without complaint, he would not be so willing to break her neck and shut her up. If he did that, though, he would never gain all the proof he needed that the miko could actually _read_.

She was proving, so far, that she could indeed comprehend the kanji, but he refused to believe it so easily. She was reading so clearly and without falter, but he rejected the idea that it was possible, and that, perhaps, she could even read better than he.

Maybe she had just memorized that page she was on before. He would trick that girl and flip the page, making her "read" something she had not prepared herself for.

There was no way _Inuyasha's wench_ could be so…educated.

He glared at the girl one more time, and she submitted, reading the next few sentences he commanded she read. He watched as her eyes darted up and down as she moved from kanji to kanji, her intense stare at the characters never shifting. Her diction was quite good, he was reluctant to admit, and her voice was loud and clear.

"That's enough," Sesshoumaru interrupted again. He fumed, frustrated because that silly girl of a miko had read once again, and he had read the kanji himself to make sure she wasn't just making up the story as she went along. He was furious to admit that she had read correctly, word for word. Maybe she had memorized the _entire_ book.

_One more test_, he decided, flipping the pages once again to a spot somewhere in the middle. Pointing to a new set of kanji, he glared as she, as usual, gave one straight back before looking down again and reading, not putting up another argument, which Sesshoumaru was grateful for.

She continued, her voice obviously irritated and huffy, most likely at his rudeness. He didn't feel guilty whatsoever. She read and read, and he didn't stop her as quickly as before. He was determined to allow her to recite the words in her book for as long as it took for her to make an error. But her reading was flawless. She did not hesitate upon any difficult word, nor did she mispronounce anything. At times, the flow of her words shifted, and she would speed up or slow down or stumble a bit over her tongue, but none of these slip-ups were any excuse for him to lash out at her, although he very much wanted to.

"Miko," Sesshoumaru angrily interrupted for the last time, "your book makes no sense whatsoever." And it didn't, because it kept saying things about disappearing cats and children turning into pigs and really, what kind of nonsense was this girl reading?

She looked up from her book and gave him a sharp, angry look. "First of all, my name is _Kagome_, not _Miko_." The taiyoukai simply looked away, far from amused. "And second, my book _does_ make perfect sense. It's supposed to be funny, and something can't be funny unless it makes sense, you know, at least not in books."

"It's ridiculous, not humorous," he bit back at her, his temper easily rising with every second he stayed in her presence. There was something about her that infuriated him, and her know-it-all attitude was definitely not helping. He was not amused with how she was able to keep up with him in both reading and comebacks, because she was a human and humans were obviously below youkai in every way possible.

The girl, _Kagome_, cried out at him, making frustrated noises in the back of her throat. "Do I have to remind you _again_ that _you_ were the one who wanted me to read this to you in the first place? If you have so many problems with it, you don't need to waste time for either of us simply because you think I—"

"How is it that you can read?"

She blinked, pausing and staring up at him as though his question made less sense than that book of hers, when, in fact, he believed it to be a very logical question, and one in dire need of an answer.

"What's it to you?" she stalled, her eyes narrowing in his direction as she stuttered only slightly.

"I suggest," he continued, "you answer my question without complaint, _Miko_."

The word alone made her blush with anger, and he noticed her gnawing at her lip, struggling to keep her ludicrous words to herself, but to no avail. "_Kagome__!_" she corrected. "And I do believe that it's none of your business whether I can read or not!"

Sesshoumaru glowered at her, his fangs shining in the sunlight dangerously. How _dare_ this inferior girl defy him. He was her lord (he believed) and a taiyoukai who could so easily destroy her without a passing glance, and she dared to speak to him the way she was. "You will tell me, _Miko_, why it is you can read."

"_My name is Kagome!_" she cried, loud enough to scare some birds from their places on branches in the trees. She angrily threw herself at him, her hands pink and glowing.

Sesshoumaru stared, not entirely surprised by her ki, but more so because he had never seen her use her hands with her power at the same time. Before he could blink, though, the light had vanished, and the girl instead ran straight into his chest.

His eyes glowed red.

...

Sesshoumaru's metal breastplate jammed into Kagome's sides, whisking her breath away as she gasped for air to recover. She tensed, aware that she had just collided straight with a very dangerous taiyoukai, and that she couldn't even hold her miko energy in her hand for longer than a second because she was already so weak and tired from the morning's activities and training.

_I'm screwed!_

She looked up slowly, book still in hand, and tensed even more at the blood red color of his eyes. She shivered nervously, terrified for her life. She had seen his eyes, as well as Inuyasha's, in that shade before, but despite her familiarity with the sight, she had never been more afraid in her whole life.

She was alone, alone and powerless, and she was the main cause of his anger. She had never been at the receiving end of those burning eyes filled with bloodlust, and she had never been as defenseless as she was now. Even if she had her arrows with her, she highly doubted she could defend herself without her energy.

She opened her mouth to call for Inuyasha, but she couldn't find her words; she was still out of breath from the collision with Sesshoumaru's spiked chest. She took a step back slowly, hoping to calm him down enough so she could flee, but her resistance was, indeed, futile.

One of Sesshoumaru's sharp claws shot out so quickly, she couldn't even pick up the action, and he grabbed her by the neck tightly, lifting her to his eye level. Her book dropped to the ground, pages landing first, but Kagome didn't notice as she automatically moved her hands up to grab onto Sesshoumaru's wrist, maroon stripes painted on his flesh.

She whimpered softly, unable to tear her frightened eyes away from his deadly ones. There was no possible way this could be the same Sesshoumaru who had treated her so kindly every night. She didn't know this demon. He was a stranger to her.

Although she was scared, her temper definitely did not disappear. It only grew as she became bitter at this Sesshoumaru, a feeling similar to hatred bubbling in her chest. She did _not_ know this demon at _all_! Whether he knew it or not, he was betraying her and her trust, and she glared at him through her horrified stare.

Sesshoumaru did not seem to notice, or if he did, he did not care. He ran his index finger against the creamy flesh of her throat, slicing it open enough so it bled. She hissed at the stinging pain, her grip on his wrist tightening reflexively.

"Your insolence is unnecessary, _Miko_," he growled at her. His voice was deeper than usual, and anger seeped through; it was an anger so frightening, Kagome could not help but shudder with terror. She was thankful tears did not prick her eyes; she was never one who wanted to be seen as a coward, especially because she was among the weakest of her friends.

She wanted to cry out, but she still couldn't, in her situation. She was bleeding just a little, but why couldn't Inuyasha smell it? Why wasn't he coming for her? She was desperate for help, struggling to get away from the taiyoukai's deadly claws.

Sesshoumaru did not bode well with her struggling, and his grip tightened around her throat, choking her and causing her to cough before she regained her ability to breathe shallowly.

Sesshoumaru growled lowly and threateningly at her, and her hatred for him grew. It burned her chest and crushed the friendly feelings for him that she had somehow gotten a hold of after those few nights. She looked down at his own neckline, spotting a very familiar handmade necklace beneath his armor, and she had never been more infuriated in her life.

There was no way this was the same Sesshoumaru.

She cried out angrily, finally finding her voice, but no words. She clawed at his wrist, although he did not flinch, and she thrashed and kicked at his armor, making sure to avoid the sharp spikes at the top. She grunted with every kick she gave, digging her nails into his flesh at every second, and she ignored the flow of blood from her neck – the cut had gotten deeper the more she struggled, but that was not an accident.

Sesshoumaru's eyes flashed in their terrifying state as he growled loudly and angrily. He intentionally slashed his claws against her throat, rewarding her with numerous shallow, but bloody, cuts.

Kagome did not let up on her actions, going on a rampage powered by her disgust and loathing. Her attacks were useless and did not harm him, but they successfully angered him to the point when he could not take it any longer, and he roughly threw her to the floor.

She gasped at the contact, the grass not cushioning her fall in the slightest. Her neck stung painfully, and her back seemed to be bruised, considering how hard he had thrown her. She was a yard or two away from him now, flat on her back and unable to get up quickly. She had reached her limit now, exhaustion piling on her and adding to every ache in her body.

Sesshoumaru took long strides toward her, his eyes softening to pink, though it was obviously forced. He kicked her book to land right beside her before standing at her feet, glowering down at her.

"You should learn your place, Miko," he said calmly and softly, although it was the most frightening voice Kagome had ever heard. "I should annihilate you right this second, but I will resist."

Kagome found her voice, but it was strangled and soft. "Why?" she whispered, still angrily and full of hatred. "Why don't you just kill me now and get it over with?" She immediately regretted her words. She did not wish to die, especially not at his hands. Thankfully, he did not attack again.

"Next time, I shall kill you." His eyes narrowed even sharper. "You are to be kept alive for now, but only because of Inuyasha."

Kagome stared up at him, gasping for air. "W-what?"

He ignored her and continued. "In every battle I have had with him, I have been able to harm him so wonderfully." His eyes grew darker for a split second. "And it is all thanks to you, Miko." She shuddered, gaping and trying to catch her breath. She was at loss for words. She did not understand, nor did she want to, but Sesshoumaru continued nonetheless. "The hanyou must always waste his time in saving your 'precious' life." His stare became serious and cynical, and Kagome's eyes widened in realization. She didn't want to hear the words she knew were true. "You never fail to get in his way. You are a weakness, you are a hindrance, and _you are a burden_."

Kagome lost her breath again, without her even realizing it. Every word Sesshoumaru had uttered just now was true, down to the dot.

_She was a burden._

Everything seemed to click at his words: why Inuyasha had always yelled at her; why her friends always had her do the dirty work, or why they would use her as a babysitter, rather than show up in battle. It was why they all got hurt…why _Inuyasha_ always had to get hurt. It was why Inuyasha could never be happy. It was why Inuyasha could never be with Kikyou without screwing things up. It was why…

Everything was her fault.

_You are a burden._

"So I shall not kill you now."

Kagome shut her eyes tightly, the rest of her remaining still as salty tears leaked from beneath her closed eyelids. She did not take notice in Sesshoumaru leaving her in the clearing, storming off angrily with his eyes still pink with frustration.

_You never fail to get in his way._

What was she but a nuisance? What was she but something else to protect? What was she but a useless shard-detector that always, always, _always_ got in the way?

_You are a weakness._

She sat up from her place in the grass, careful of her bruised back. Her tears of self-pity flowed from her eyes, dripping down beneath her chin and mixing with her bloody neck. Her hands twisted around each other in her lap, nearly cutting off her circulation.

_You are a hindrance._

She didn't know why she was crying like this. She was just proving herself to be just as weak as everyone seemed to believe she was. And it was all his fault.

Sesshoumaru.

He had frustrated her, commanded her, terrified her, degraded her, hurt her. Where was the Sesshoumaru from the lake? Where was his kindness, his compassion? Where were his words, and where was his embrace?

Where was Sesshoumaru?

And now he had put the truth right in her face, and she couldn't handle it any longer. She didn't know why she was here. She didn't know why she was just lying around, why she seemed to think it was okay to be lazy and read peacefully when there were more important things going on, more important things she should be doing.

No, no more. She would need to train harder than ever, no longer to help Sesshoumaru, but to help herself. She would not let his words be true any longer. She _refused_ to be what he said she was. She would train harder than ever, and she would prove herself. She would be able to hold out on her own, and she would no longer cause harm to her friends.

She would not cause harm to Inuyasha.

She would show that damn Sesshoumaru. She would show them _all_. Sesshoumaru was wrong. He was _wrong_.

She looked at the book at her side, sprawled on the ground face-down. Her tears flowed freely now, and she bent her knees upward, hugged them to her, and buried her head within them.

This would be the last time she cried.

This would be the last time she got in the way.

This would be the last time Sesshoumaru would accuse her of such things.

Her shoulders shook, her hair curtained her face, and she sobbed.

_You are a burden._

...

A/N: Revised. It was a little hard to do this one, since I was editing a chapter about a really hot and sunny day when in reality, I was sitting – soaking wet because I was stupid enough to forget an umbrella or a hood or something – on campus in the pouring rain. Well, that's San Francisco for you, I guess.

I know I've had a really messy way of writing POVs in this story, but hopefully it's a little cleaner and easier to understand in this chapter. It always bugs me when Kagome and Sesshoumaru's thoughts go back and forth, but I'm always too lazy to fix it. Hmmm.

Fun fact: this original chapter came out on the one-year anniversary of this story. It's a shame there's been so little posts since then (oops) but I'm going to try to update a thousand times faster! But don't hold me to it hahaha


	8. apples

...

**the mermaid  
**by mystical spirits

**[apples]**

"_It does not matter how slowly you go so long as you do not stop."  
— Confucius —_

...

Inuyasha yawned loudly, his head tilted towards the clear sky and his arms high behind his head. Sunny days always made him a bit lazier than usual, and with the day's work nearly finished, he was ready to relax.

He didn't know what the others were doing at the moment, but he didn't much care to begin with. Kaede was probably doing some sort of housekeeping or healing some sick villager, Miroku would be off flirting with the women, and Shippou could be playing with the village children. It was just another boring day in Kaede's village, but it was a nice vacation too.

Although he didn't like admitting it, he was relieved for a bit of a break. With Naraku gone now, there wasn't much of a rush to get the jewel shards when they could just be lazing around for a while.

Inuyasha faltered a little. It obviously wasn't that simple – it never was. As far as he knew, there was probably another stupid demon trying to collect the shards too, and Inuyasha hated competition. He grumbled to himself, eventually sighing and shrugging it off. The others wanted to take a break, and he already told Kagome in the morning that he wouldn't give them sass to go shard-hunting today. _So I might as well take the day off, right?_

Wrong.

The scent of blood drifted to his nose slowly at first, but the more Inuyasha focused on it, the more he recognized the hot, spicy odor.

"Kagome!"

Inuyasha stiffened immediately, rushing in a sprint towards the direction her blood was coming from. She was hurt. He couldn't understand why it took so long for him to notice. The stench stung his sensitive nose, heightening his sporadic emotions. She had lost a lot of blood, he could tell; she didn't just slice her finger. The scent was different, sharper than that of Kagome's monthly heat – _this_ blood practically screamed Kagome was in danger.

_I'm coming, Kagome!_

His speed increased as he hopped from one tree to another, and there was no end to his frustration when his nose told him she was farther away than he expected. What was she _doing_ all the way out there?

Despite his demonic speed, he realized he was a bit too late as he eventually crashed through the leaves and into the clearing. Kagome sat on her knees, her head in her hands as the salty aroma of tears trickled down her cheeks. Her shoulders were shaking, but she made no sound as she silently sobbed. Inuyasha's keen eyes caught sight of a book from her time lying face down beside her, and his brow narrowed at the sight of her bleeding and sliced throat.

"Kagome!" he stiffened, crying her name out in a whisper that she somehow heard. She looked up at the intruder through teary eyes as he rushed towards her, kneeling in front of her and staring at the damage with marigold eyes.

He saw her falter, choking on her tears as she made eye contact with him, but once she seemed to notice that his eyes were those of worry and concern, she calmed down considerably. She looked as though she wanted to lunge into Inuyasha's arms, but she was hesitant and refused to do so, and despite the circumstances, his heart felt heavy with disappointment.

"Kagome," he fussed, his voice soft with comfort, but stressed with apprehension, "who did this to you?" She did not answer him, but she didn't need to. It was only a second before Inuyasha found the answer to his own question, the putrid stench of his elder brother assaulting his nostrils. He began to shake with rage. "That bastard!"

He clenched his fists, not minding his claws, which dug into his flesh and bled before healing immediately with his quick regeneration. That_ bastard_. He had only that morning spoke with that _fucking_ Sesshoumaru, warning him to stay the _hell_ away from them, and yet he had torn up Kagome's neck and left her lying there. How _dare_ he.

Sesshoumaru must have known how precious Kagome was to Inuyasha. He must have intentionally hurt her because of it. He had to be mocking him that morning when he agreed to keep his distance. Even if he was provoked, he had _no right_ to hurt Kagome and turn her into a sobbing child.

Inuyasha took many deep breaths, nostrils flaring, trying to control his rage as best as he could. He would get that Sesshoumaru, he vowed. He refused to allow him to get away with hurting her. Yes, he was going to pay a visit to his _dear brother _soon enough—

"Don't," Kagome's quiet voice calmed him quickly.

"Kagome," he shook his head, "what are you—"

"Don't go see him."

Inuyasha stared at her as she avoided his gaze. His emotions and attempts to bottle up his frustrations were probably so very clear to her. He sighed, no longer shaking with bloodlust towards Sesshoumaru, though his hatred for him only grew. He nodded slowly and hesitantly at first, but he soon agreed. It was only fair to Kagome; it was her all up to her. "Alright. Alright, I won't."

Kagome smiled through her tears. "Ar…arigatou."

He frowned. He knew Kagome. He _loved_ her. She was not one to have a broken spirit. What on Earth had Sesshoumaru _done_ to her to make her this way? "Kagome…" He leaned closer, lifting her face gently by her jaw and forcing her to look at him. The caring look in his eyes was a rare sight, and it was enough. She let loose a few more tears, her face stoic and still just as beautiful as ever, in his eyes. He brushed his clawed thumbs against her cheeks, wiping her tears away to his best ability. He was never very good with comforting people, but Kagome was an exception by far.

"Kagome, are you alright? What'd he do to you? How much does it hurt?" His words were paced, but his slow speech did not hide how very shaken he was. He was fidgety and couldn't sit still, and he had no idea what he could do to help her. It was _she_ who had the healing abilities, not him.

"I'm fine," she muttered, shaking her head slowly. "I'm fine."

"No, you _ain't_ fine!" Inuyasha glared at her as always, but it was a very different kind of glare this time. His eyes flooded with protectiveness, and, at the very least, Kagome seemed to understand.

"I _am_, Inuyasha." She smiled a fake smile, meant to console him, if anything. "I can barely feel a thing."

Lie. Inuyasha wasn't as stupid as everyone thought. He could smell the fear, the _pain_, through her blood and tears. His pointed look at her didn't faze her though, and he sighed.

"Come on," he said softly. He didn't need to get technical right now, not when she was so obviously in both physical and emotional pain. "Show me your neck." He left no room for protest, tilting her head to the side so he could examine her. "Idiot…and you say you can't feel it!"

The cuts across her throat were both better and worse than he expected. Although the slashes were shallow, they bled freely at the broken skin. The cuts were neat and messy all at once, as though Sesshoumaru didn't care where he wounded her, which Inuyasha wouldn't put past him. He could have very well damaged a vital point with his careless strikes, and Inuyasha considered both he and Kagome lucky that he had not injured those points.

The blood from her wounds still slid down her neck, some of it staining her uniform collar. Inuyasha wiped some of the blood away with his hand, but with the amount of it coating her skin, and he with no spare cloth, he couldn't completely clean it.

He winced at her wounds. He could never quite get used to seeing her in pain. "Now," he muttered as reassuringly as he could, holding back a hiss at the gashes, "that ain't hardly a mosquito bite."

Kagome let out a forced, short laugh in spite of herself. "Big mosquito."

Inuyasha smiled despite himself. At least she wasn't so badly hurt that she couldn't mess around. As quickly as the smile found its way to his face, it disappeared into a frown. "Hey, we need to get you bandaged up. Do you think you're okay to heal yourself a little?"

She shook her head slowly, causing more blood to seep from her marred flesh. "I used up all my ki already. I could try, but I don't think I have the energy." Her voice was soft, and Inuyasha could hear her self-pity wallowing in it.

"Nah," he rubbed her shoulder gently, "don't over-work yourself. Just relax, I'll get you back to Kaede and she'll fix you up in no time."

She frowned, her fingers digging into the cloth of the skirt in her lap. "Yeah…"

Inuyasha couldn't bear the sight. She looked broken, her tear-stained face now dry, but he was certain she was far from feeling better. Her bangs covered her empty, void eyes, and her neck was pale from blood loss. Her hair was tangled, and the scent of mixed emotions radiated off of her, mixing with the horrid stench of Sesshoumaru's temper.

"Kagome." Inuyasha leapt forward, embracing Kagome tightly to him, not wanting to let her go. She began to sob again, her voice becoming mangled, although it seemed she had no more tears left in her to cry. "I'm sorry, Kagome. I'm sorry I wasn't here to protect you."

"No!" Kagome pushed against him, but he wouldn't budge. "No, don't apologize! I mean it! Do you hear me?" Inuyasha was shocked at her sudden outburst, but he refused to let her go. "It's _not_ your job to protect me, you know. You have to protect yourself, that's all. _I'm_ the one who needs to protect myself. _Me_!"

"Kagome—"

"No! Weren't you listening?"

"Kagome, stop it!" He grasped her tighter, holding her head to his chest as he rubbed her back with his other clawed hand. Her struggles grew weaker until she collapsed into him, her fingers clenching his red haori. "Kagome, why are you being this way? Don't you remember all we've been through?" He frowned into her hair. "It_ is_ my job to protect you. You're the most important person to me, Kagome, and whether you like it or not, I'm gonna look out for you. There's a reason why I can use the Tetsusaiga, you know." He hugged her tightly, her shaking shoulders unnerving him, but her grip on him giving him strength to go on. "Let me protect you, Kagome."

She buried her face in his clothes, still and silent for a long time. "Alright. Alright, I will. But you need to understand something else, Inuyasha." She pulled away to look up at him, and her gaze made the hanyou's heart thud against his ribcage. "You can't protect me _all_ the time. As much as I trust you, I can't rely only on you. I need to rely on myself too."

She looked down at her lap. "But I'm weak. I'm weak, and I'm not getting any stronger. Kaede's started to help me train my miko energy, but look at me!" She frowned, beginning to shake again, and Inuyasha stroked her hair to calm her down. "When Sesshoumaru attacked me, I couldn't _do_ anything about it! He sliced me up and threw me to the ground, and I couldn't do anything! Even when he spoke to me, I couldn't even—"

She choked, shoving her face into her hands. Inuyasha watched her, his eyes narrowing at the words very thought Sesshoumaru. He had _attacked_ her. He had _hurt_ her. What on Earth did he say to Kagome that made her break down like this?

"But I can't just… Everyone knows going through things like this can hurt, but it's up to me to do something about it." Inuyasha stared at her. He had no idea what she was even talking about. "I'm not just going to sit here and let him say those things about me anymore. I_ refuse_ to let him be right. I want to be stronger, Inuyasha. I don't want to be the weak little girl that fell down that well two years ago. I want all this to have made me stronger. I don't want to be the same, weak schoolgirl." She sighed loudly, her voice still wavering, but she smiled, and that was enough. "I want to grow up. I want to be a better person. But," she frowned, "I don't know how to start."

Inuyasha scoffed down at her, resuming his usual rough and confident speech. "Is that all?" Kagome stiffened and stared up at him, eyes wide. "Well? You wanna get stronger, is that it?" He grinned at her from his kneeling position. "Look, if Kaede's helping you out with this miko stuff of yours, then you're going to need someone to help you with the big stuff, you know, the hand-to-hand combat. Kaede's an old hag, she can't help you with that kind of thing." He smirked cockily, pointing at himself with his long claw. "Guess _I'll _just have to train you myself, huh?"

The reaction was exactly the one Inuyasha was hoping for: Kagome stared at him for a few more silent seconds, but soon her sad eyes grew brighter and a grin spread across her face. She didn't seem to notice that her neck was still a bloody mess, nor did she seem to remember her destroyed book beside her.

"Inuyasha!" she cried, lunging at him and hugging his neck tightly.

"Hey!" he flung his arms back. "Get off of me! I may be a demon, but I need to breathe too, you know."

Kagome giggled delightfully, her depression easing away slowly but surely. Inuyasha smiled. She was happy again, and it made him happy too.

_You're one lucky bastard, Sesshoumaru,_ he thought to himself. _But don't count your luck yet. You're going to pay for hurting Kagome, and that's a promise._

"Hey, you," he mockingly complained, "get off! We've gotta get you back to the village so Kaede can clean you up."

She just smiled at him softly. "No, don't tell anyone else about it, okay?" He frowned at her, his eyes asking the question he didn't have to say out loud. "I don't want them to worry. I guess I provoked Sesshoumaru into what he did to me. It's nothing, don't worry about it. I just need to clean up a bit, but don't tell the others or they'll freak out." She gave him a reassuring smile, placing her hand on his shoulder sweetly. "Tomorrow, my ki should be back in my body, and I'll have enough energy to heal myself. They're just scratches, really. I'll fix it up tomorrow, I promise."

Inuyasha watched her, uncertain. "I don't know, Kagome. You're pretty torn up. You sure you don't need help or anything?"

"Yeah, I'm positive."

He sighed hesitantly. Even though she claimed she was feeling better, he knew she was still hurt both physically and emotionally. He understood nearly everything about her, being in love with her as much as he was, and he could tell she just didn't want him to worry about her. She was selfless, but he knew she hadn't gotten over what happened between her and Sesshoumaru, whatever it was. There was something about the way she fidgeted that proved she wasn't back to normal yet. How could he_ not_ worry?

"Well," he muttered, "at least let me walk you back to the village. You need to change out of that shirt of yours too. Shippou's got a weak nose still, but if you really don't want to worry him, you should get rid of it."

"Yeah, I know. Maybe I'll take another trip home. I'll be real quick, I swear."

Inuyasha helped her stand, stabling her when she rocked from the dizziness. His fingers tingled at every touch, one hand holding her waist, and the other, her arm. His heart thumped in his chest at the close proximity. Despite all the times they were close together, all the times he gave her a lift on his back, and especially that one time she had kissed him, he had never been able to calm the drumming of his heart. It was true he felt similar emotions when Kikyou was still around, but he couldn't help but notice how his heart thumped faster for Kagome.

"I'm okay now, I think," she muttered, letting go of Inuyasha's arms for a mere second before stumbling back into their grasp. "Or not."

He chuckled, his voice soft again. "Sheesh, Kagome, how clumsy can you get?"

"Well, ex_cuse_ me!" she teased, her fake smile ever-so-visible to him. "Maybe if you didn't—"

Her words were cut off as Inuyasha hugged her close suddenly. A light blush, so light it was barely even there, uncharacteristically swept across his nose as he buried it into her smooth, tangled hair. "You idiot…" he trailed off, holding her close. "You get into more trouble than you're worth." He felt her relax and embrace him back, reassuring him that she was alright. He smirked weakly. He could always trust her to understand exactly what he was trying to say.

He took a deep breath, inhaling her scent, her true scent, and not that of her blood or emotions. _Apples. She smells like apples._

"Inu no baka!" Kagome's voice teased his dog-like ears. "If you don't stop, I'm going to bleed all over you!"

"Hey!" he protested, reluctantly letting her go. "Who're you calling stupid?"

"Inuyasha!" she rolled her eyes, the tone of her voice begging him to hurry up.

"Alright, already," he groaned, shifting back into his casual mood and out of his tender one, the one reserved for Kagome. He made sure she wouldn't fall over again before he leaned down and picked up her book, handing it to her when she held her palm out in front of her.

"Okay," Kagome sang, "let's head back now."

She began to walk away slowly, gently rubbing her neck to clean some blood away. Inuyasha stared at her back, an affectionate glint in his marigold eyes, the exact opposite of the flash in his brother's matching ones.

"Yeah, let's go."

...

It was just past midnight now, and Kagome was terrified. She looked like "Hanabi" now, but her alternate appearance did _not_ change the fact that she had numerous scabbing slashes across her throat. She looked down into the water and let her fingers graze the blemished flesh, flinching a bit; it still stung, both physically and emotionally. She pushed her hair behind her ears, letting it drape in front of her to cover her chest, and, by doing so, her neck.

She floated behind the boulder protruding from the water, enough so that she was visible to Sesshoumaru once he arrived, but also enough so he would not see her very clearly. Her back leaned against the rock, facing towards the shore, and the moonlight bathed her with an ethereal glow.

She tilted her head back against the cold stone, making sure her hair still covered her neckline. Her fingers playing with the bracelet around her wrist, she considered breaking her promise to Sesshoumaru and tearing it off, only to throw it into the sea, but she held back. If she did so, she was afraid to anger him any more than she already had that day.

She narrowed her eyes, closing them tightly. Her hatred for him still ran deep, despite all it took to get Inuyasha off her back, even though she knew he could see right through her. She felt her chest bubbling with pure loathing at the single thought of Sesshoumaru. How could she have fallen for his ridiculous lies, his fake kindness towards her? He betrayed her, whether he knew it or not, and she hated him for it.

She refused to give in to him, once he arrived. If he believed he could get away with hurting her and degrading her by showing up in this clearing all over again to pretend as though he'd never done it, then he had another thing coming!

_Still…_ Kagome opened her eyes, sighing deeply. It wasn't as though he knew Kagome and Hanabi were one and the same, but then again, it should be no excuse to torture a human girl simply because Hanabi wasn't there to be his conscience.

The gentle sound of rustling leaves drifted into Kagome's ears, and she was immediately on alert. Sesshoumaru was here, and it was time to lay it on thick.

From the corner of her eye, she watched the wretched youkai approach, instantly spotting her. She seethed at his comfortable expression, his stoic beauty, and his playful gaze. _What's he trying to pull?_ She growled inwardly with frustration, incensed at the completely oblivious terror that was Sesshoumaru.

She turned away from him quickly, hiding behind the rock again, but not before she caught his questioning glance. Her cheeks flushed with anger as she controlled the urge to pound her fists against the water's surface.

"You are troubled."

_No shit,_ she thought to herself, her mind vulgar with revulsion. Outwardly, she merely threw another glance at him before turning her head away. He was on her turf now, and she could sense his preposterous confusion and hurt. _As if_ his _pain can be compared to mine!_

"Leave me alone." If Sesshoumaru was offended before, he was certainly distressed now. She could practically feel him stiffen at her words, and it only made her even more livid as she witnessed his alarm. "Don't act so surprised," she couldn't help but bite out.

"What is it you expect?" his smooth voice refused to betray any emotions she knew he was feeling. "What is the meaning of this?"

"So many questions…" she murmured loud enough for him to hear. She did not offer an answer.

"Why are you being this way?"

She glared from the corner of her eye, making certain to keep her neck out of his view. "And why are you?"

"Because you are avoiding me. It is unnecessary."

"And," Kagome snapped, "so are you."

Silence thickened the air as tension built up, the taiyoukai's pain evident to even Kagome, who was doing her best to calm down so she could set him straight. She took the slightest peek at him, startled at the hurt, ignorant look in his golden eyes.

_The same eyes that were blood-red only hours ago._

Kagome turned away. She didn't want to look at his damn eyes anymore. They were enough to spark the flame of fear in her chest, and she hated feeling weak and defeated. Her words and spite could only do so much to relieve her frightened state. Despite how calm he was now, she could not forget the rough way he had handled her that day, nor the way he tossed her around like a beanbag that he could shred without feeling any remorse. His deadly claws unnerved her, his looming height intimidated her, and his sharp, dangerous eyes terrified her into anxiety. She was surprised she hadn't had a panic attack by now; she was that frightened of him.

"Hanabi," Sesshoumaru's voice sounded strong, but Kagome could pick up the shakiness of it when she paid close attention, "I do not know what it is I have done, but do not…do not be this way."

Kagome's hands shook with anger. He didn't know what he'd done! "How can you _say_ that?" she cried from behind the boulder. "How can you—"

She shut herself up abruptly, and she was not surprised that it had captured Sesshoumaru's attention. "Explain yourself." How could he act so casual about it? How dare that bastard remain so collected.

"I saw what you did, Sesshoumaru," she started vaguely, her voice quiet all over again.

She felt his eyes on her hidden form as he spoke. "What?" He still did not understand?

"Today…I saw you!" She faltered, pausing to take a deep breath. She refused to look at him. "You were right here, in this clearing. You're foolish if you honestly believed I couldn't see you simply because the barrier was invisible." She told the truth slant, as though it was Hanabi who had watched his cruelty, although she had really witnessed it first-hand.

Sesshoumaru seemed to understand what she was speaking of now, but he was not fazed. "What of it? The wench was testing my patience. It was only necessary that I punish her for her insolence."

He had hit a soft spot, but it was too late for him to take it back now. "Damn your pride, _youkai_!" she cried, not paying attention to the way he stiffened at her insult. "You made me believe you weren't so terrible, that you _did_ have a heart somewhere inside that cruel body of yours, but what I saw today proved me wrong. _I_ was the fool, believing you could be worth my time!"

She turned to face him, and she immediately regretted her words once she saw his expression. He looked as stoic as ever, but his eyes betrayed him: he was both livid and crestfallen with pain, and she could feel her heart twisting inside her chest. When had she become so cruel? Was she much better than Sesshoumaru, speaking to him like that?

_He deserves it_, she thought to herself. _He betrayed me. Why should I feel sorry about what I said when he's done so much worse to me?_

Her own thoughts betrayed her, and her face softened at his expression. She knew he was still staring at her, and she forced her apologetic look into her eyes to back up her next statement. "I'm sorry. That came out wrong. That's not what I mean, and you know it."

Whether he did or not, she couldn't say. He seemed unable to look away from her, but it was clear he was dumbstruck.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean it, I really didn't."

His only response was a small nod, but his expression didn't change.

"Listen," she continued, her voice softer than ever before, but she knew his demonic hearing picked up her words, "I saw you hurt that girl. I saw the way you treated her as an inferior, and whether or not rank places you higher than her, you have no right to treat her as badly as you did. I saw you, slicing her up like that." Her face contorted into a frown and she had to look away from him, so she did not see his softening, guilty expression. "I just… I've heard a lot about you, most being rumors of your violent nature, and I ignored them all when I started talking to you. But after seeing what I have today…I've discovered they aren't rumors after all.

"I don't know what kind of satisfaction you get out of hurting others, humans especially, but I think it's one of the most disgusting things I've ever seen." Her voice became bitter for a split second, but she caught herself before she continued. "You tarnished my positive image of you, Sesshoumaru. I don't like this side of you. I don't…I don't want to see you like that anymore."

Kagome thought she had run out of tears once Inuyasha came along to comfort her, but she was sorely mistaken. First one tear fell, and then it was two, then three, then four. She buried her face into the boulder in front of her, her hair covering her face, still hiding her scarred throat. She didn't sob, but her tears didn't stop either. She didn't know what Sesshoumaru's reaction to her crying was, but she didn't much care to know. She was ashamed, though, for being so weak as to let her emotions take over her once again, and in front of him, no less. She didn't want to be the weakling he saw her as.

"Stop," his voice drifted towards her, his desperate begging almost completely hidden away from his tone. "I—" Kagome's eyes would have widened if they were open; she was not used to Sesshoumaru stuttering. "I have made mistakes. I have disappointed you." His voice softened tremendously, and she had to strain her ears to hear him. "I too do not want you to see me like that any longer."

Her head jerked up to stare at him in shock. This wasn't like him. He wasn't being serious. He_ liked_ Hanabi, and it was only natural he would be sorry to _her_. But no, this wasn't the real Sesshoumaru. If she came to him as Kagome and said the same thing, he would scoff and turn away, at the very least. This was _not _Sesshoumaru.

"Why are you saying this to _me_?" she muttered to him with finality. She gave him a single, long look, the tears still pouring in a way she was sure couldn't be very attractive, before she realized she couldn't be in his presence any longer. She may have spoken to him, telling him what she wanted to say, but it didn't completely erase any tension, fear, or anger for her.

Giving him one last look, she pushed against the rock and swam away, pleased that he had never seen the slashes across her neck.

Just moments after she darted off, her brain filled with curses and apologies alike as she wondered about Sesshoumaru's reactions, she was stopped in her tracks.

"What did I tell you?" came the familiar voice. "I_ told_ you it wouldn't work out. He's a youkai, and he's _not _to be trusted."

Kagome turned away. "Not now, Nayida."

The redhead watched her closely. "And why not? He hurt you, the bastard, just like I predicted. And what, it only took two nights?"

"Three," Kagome corrected subconsciously. Had it really only been three nights since she had spoken to him? Four, if she counted the one night he spied on her without confronting her. Maybe Nayida was right. Maybe she gave her trust to him much too easily.

"All the same, Hanabi," the mermaid shook her head, "I think it's best if you stay away from him for_ real_ this time." She frowned at the tears flowing down her friend's face, its lavender color shining against the blue water. "He's hurt you, Hanabi. I know I haven't been acting it since yesterday, but I really _don't_ want you to be hurt. That stupid demon…he doesn't deserve your company."

"That's enough, Nayida."

The younger, married girl shook her head in protest. "No, Hanabi, this needs to be said. That youkai has crossed the line, and you already bothered to give him a chance! Staying away from him would be best. You should just have the barrier reject him—"

"I said that's _enough,_ Nayida." Kagome wiped her purple tears aside, taking a deep breath. "Besides, you know I can't decide who comes in and out of the barrier. It acts on its own." She sighed. "I know you're worried about me, Nayida, and I appreciate it, I really do, but I think I can make decisions for myself. I _am _the captain's daughter, after all."

Nayida's eyes softened. "That you are, Hanabi, but I'm still worried. I don't want you to be upset because of the insolence of demons."

"I know, Nayida, I know. But please…"

She trailed off, and the redhead smiled sadly. "Yeah. I'm sorry."

Kagome exhaled through her nose, shaking her head to herself. "If you'll excuse me."

She nodded in response. "Of course, Hanabi."

Kagome began to swim away once again. She mentally berated herself: why was she always the one running away from her problems? Everything was becoming a mess right before her eyes. All the control she thought she had, over her twisted life and her friends and especially Sesshoumaru, was gone.

She paused in her tracks, not turning around to face the mermaid she knew was still floating behind her. "And Nayida? It's Kagome."

And with her correction, she disappeared into the inky, cerulean sea.

...

It was the next morning already, and Sesshoumaru sulked. He didn't think he'd ever had a worse night than the one just hours ago, and he was completely ashamed of himself.

Hanabi had rejected him. Even though she apologized after saying what she did, he had still disgusted her nonetheless. It was a bit unnerving, knowing that she could accept his presence, his one arm, and his friendship, but she was sickened by the attitude he was accustomed to, the attitude of a youkai.

He couldn't help but agree with her though. He did not regret anything he had done to that girl, Inuyasha's wench – or, like she pushed, _Kagome _– but he didregret making a fool of himself in front of the only girl he wished to impress.

Maybe it was because he wanted to repent, or maybe it was because he was ashamed of himself, or maybe it was because of something entirely different, he did not know. All the same, he found himself, that next day, in the same, familiar clearing, right in front of the very girl he had wounded in more ways than one.

She seemed surprised to see him, but then again, he was surprised himself that he had come at all. She had no book today, and he was somewhat relieved. If he wanted to do what he intended to, he would need all the temptation of repeating his actions to just disappear.

"Wh-what are you doing here?"

It was like a repeat of yesterday, he noticed. She had asked that very same question before the whole mess started. He caught sight of the bloodstained grass beneath his shoes, and his eyes sought out the gashes across her neck. His pointed ears picked up the fear in her voice, but they did not miss the determination in it either. He was impressed how she had not gone running off to Inuyasha by now. His half-brother's stench still remained in the clearing, and it was clear he had been there to comfort the girl after he had left.

"Well?" the girl stared up at him, a heated look in her eyes. She was just as stubborn as yesterday, he noticed. She just didn't learn.

He shut his eyes momentarily, the magenta shade of his eyelids bright. He took a breath, bracing himself for his words. If it had been any other moment in his life, he would find this degrading, but there was something that itched at him to say it. He could always beat himself for his words later, but for now, he could not stop them from flowing from his mouth.

"My apologies."

The girl's eyes widened, clear shock written all over her face. She sputtered a bit, an action that did not surprise him, but it did not please him either. She gulped and gaped a few times, trying to find her voice.

"N-no! No, no, don't—" She stumbled over her words, and it was obvious his words were the last thing she expected. "That is, uh… I mean, I'm sorry too!"

Sesshoumaru did not fully expect to hear_ those_ words either.

"Well, you see, it's partly my fault too, you know. I guess I shouldn't have provoked you. It takes two, you know…" She lost her voice, unable to find the words, but he too could not seem to find any himself.

"Your neck," he said vaguely, staring at her wounds. He hadn't realized, in his state of bloodlust, that he had donethat much to her. If he had known what a zebra was, he might've made the comparison.

The miko shook her head vigorously. "Oh no, it's fine!" To prove her point, she lifted one of her hands and urged it to glow pink. It seemed she had regained her ki overnight. Her hand hovered over her throat for a second or two, eventually pulling away. Sesshoumaru was shocked, to say the least, that the cuts were completely healed and gone, and the only thing there was her milky flesh.

"See, it's fine! All better!"

He nodded to her once, his surprise refusing to show.

Well, he had finished what he meant to do. It was harder than he expected, lowering himself to a human's level, but he didn't regret it. He did not know if it was because of Hanabi or for himself, nor did he know if it was for the girl, _Kagome_, but for some reason, he had accepted his very own apologetic words. It was strange, but it did not bother him.

He shrugged it off. Perhaps it would do him well not to linger on it.

He blinked slowly, turning around and walking towards the edge of the clearing. The girl said nothing as he reached the forest trees. Before he could step any further, though, she gave her parting words:

"Sesshoumaru…thank you."

He could hear the grin in her voice, and he somehow did not mind her informality. He gave no reply, but continued forward.

And as he left, a single scent tantalized his sensitive nose:

She smelt of apples.

...

Disclaimer: A pair of lines in this chapter are "borrowed" from the pilot episode of _Firefly_ (dir. Joss Whedon). Stole "Haven" from him too, from _Serenity_. Props to whoever can find the lines, although it shouldn't be too hard (:

A/N: Revised! Um, the apples thing is actually a symbol. It's really better for you guys to figure it out yourself, but I know no one really wants to, so you can ask me if you want. Whatevs. And okay, so this is VERY important: **this is not an Inuyasha/Kagome story**, nor is it a love triangle. I'm not much of an Inu/Kag shipper in fanfiction (except for anything by Rozefire) but I don't want to make him OOC either. I hatehatehate character-bashing.

Oh, and I finally read "Raindrops" on DeviantArt. I absolutely loved it, and the drawings are amazing! But some people have been asking me about the similarities between my story and YoukaiYume's doujinshi, so I feel like I need to clear things up: I DID NOT STEAL ANY IDEAS FROM IT. I've only just read it today, after all. And if you check the dates of this story and that comic, you can see I posted my work first. I'm not claiming that YoukaiYume stole my ideas because she didn't (I met her once and she's a lovely lady), but I most certainly didn't take anything from her either.


	9. gentleman

...

**the mermaid  
**by mystical spirits

**[gentleman]**

"_A man said to the universe:  
_'_Sir, I exist!'  
_'_However,' replied the universe  
_'_The fact has not created in me  
A sense of obligation.'"  
— Stephen Crane —_

...

It had been pure and utter torture for the first few hours, the following night. Kagome (in the form of Hanabi) and Sesshoumaru (who was even more silent than usual) had been in a rather awkward state, despite the fact that the real Kagome had patched things up with the taiyoukai just hours earlier. She hadn't had a clue that the night after her "fight" with Sesshoumaru would be tense, so tense that they could barely breathe, but there they were, practically suffocating on the thick air.

Of course, the awkward moments had taken place much earlier. It was now the middle of the night, somewhere around three or four in the morning, just under two hours before Kagome would transform back into her human body, and everything was flowing nicely again, conversation-wise.

It wasn't hard to forget, though, the way Sesshoumaru had refused to meet her eyes, although his attitude remained as cold and stoic as always. She remembered how she had again hidden behind the boulder in the center of the lake, despite the fact that she no longer had the scars from his slashes against her neck. She had had nothing to hide from him this time around, aside from the usual identity thing (but really, that was barely worth mentioning).

But that was to be put aside for now. Although it took hours to resolve and move on from the tense conversation, she and Sesshoumaru had eventually shifted into a comfortable atmosphere once again. Kagome – or Hanabi, for that matter – did not apologize to Sesshoumaru for her rudeness the night prior, and Sesshoumaru did not apologize or even bring up the issue of "the miko girl" again. There was no need to do so. They understood each other's silence, and not a word on the matter was said.

Now Kagome was resting her head atop her folded arms, her chin tickled by the grass on the top of the plateau. She snuggled her nose into the backsides of her elbows, making a small humming noise and resting her eyes shut. A significant annoyance of transforming every night was the fact that she was sleep deprived. She only hoped she wouldn't be cranky the next morning.

"What is it?" she murmured softly. Even with her eyes closed, she could sense Sesshoumaru watching her from his sitting position beside her.

He didn't respond very quickly, but she didn't expect him to in the first place. He was a rather strange demon, she inwardly snickered, because he talked so little. "It's nothing."

"You're sure about that?" she smiled softly into her arms. A few seconds afterwards, she opened her eyes slowly, looking up at him and feeling rather small because of the height difference. "Something on your mind?"

He shook his head minutely. If she hadn't known better, she would've guessed he hadn't moved in the slightest. "Not at all," he assured her.

"Well," she hesitated, "only if you're sure." She rolled her eyes a bit before closing them again. Maybe it was just a fluke, that he had been so talkative the previous nights. It was harder to get him to open up tonight, although all the awkwardness had gone away. "Hey," she sighed after a moment's pause, "tell me about yourself." He threw her an emotionless look, but his lack of an answer urged her to continue. "C'mon, you can't be _that_ bad...can you?"

He turned his head away to look out at the black, inky depths of the lake. "You already know everything about me, so what left is there to say?" She got the hint. He was referring to the fact that she – as Hanabi – seemed to know all his opinions towards those he had encountered (more specifically, his wards, Inuyasha, and so on). Naturally, he didn't know she really knew nothing about him at all, except for the things she had witnessed herself as a human. He probably thought she was some sort of psychic or something.

"Well," she sighed, "there's got to be _something_."

He just looked at her, though she couldn't actually see him doing so, with her eyes shut. "Tell me about _your_self," he said forcefully, albeit quietly. "I do not believe I know anything about you."

"Hn," she muttered. "I wouldn't know what to say."

"You understand my predicament, then."

She chuckled. "Not at all." She opened her eyes again, staring straight in front of her in thought. "How about this: I'll tell you something about me, but only if you'll tell me something about you when I'm finished. Deal?" He seemed to think about it for a moment, but he eventually nodded his head. "Alright, then. What would you like to know?"

Sesshoumaru tossed his brilliant silver hair over his shoulder in a swift, silent motion. His golden eyes observed the water, taking his time to think something up. "Your family," he said finally.

Kagome lifted her head in surprise. She didn't expect him to ask a question that would be so sensitive to her, but he couldn't have known how it would affect her. She smiled softly, aware that she should be holding up her end of the agreement. Her only concerns were letting out too much information. If she didn't shut up early enough, he could find out who she really was, and that wouldn't be very pretty.

"Well, okay," she sighed loudly, trying to seem as casual and immune to his question as possible. "But forgive me if I don't go into too much detail. I don't think I'm very good at storytelling."

He just looked at her from the corner of his eyes, but she assumed he understood.

"Right, well… Let's see, where should I start?"

Sesshoumaru spoke up finally, and it was then that Kagome remembered he had eavesdropped on her and Nayida's conversation that first night – no, it was the second, she recalled, considering he hadn't spoken to her the first night he was really there. He must've remembered the bitter way she spoke about _that man_.

"Your father," he said smoothly. "Start with your father."

"Oh…" she hesitated. "Yeah, alright." She took a deep breath, clearing her throat a bit before beginning:

"Well, Father works for the king of the entire clan. He's the head captain. You probably didn't know, but merfolk don't really get along with sirens and selkies and such, so sometimes there are fights. Nothing serious though." She paused, realizing Sesshoumaru probably lost her by that point. "Uh, never mind. Well, uh, our clan. All of us are actually part of the same family, but there are so many inner-branches that we're pretty distant relatives, so there are a lot of intermarriages. Nayida's married to her third cousin, did you know?" _Stupid, stupid!_ she told herself. _Of course he didn't know. And he probably doesn't care, either._

"Sorry," she shook her head. "I've gone on a tangent again. Back to my father, then?" She watched as Sesshoumaru hesitated – although she barely noticed it – and she did not continue until he had eventually agreed.

"I know this might sound incredibly rude, and this is definitely out of place, but…" She paused, unsure if she should insult her father in the presence of a taiyoukai, but she gave in to the temptation. "I really, _really_ can't stand that bastard!"

She was sure Sesshoumaru was staring at her now. It wasn't everyday one heard a mermaid call her powerful father anything remotely degrading, let alone in terminology like that. Kagome was unfazed, not regretting her words, and her eyes narrowed at the very thought of him.

"He can't stand me either, though," she continued. "We don't hate each other, but we definitely don't like each other. We have a…complicated sort of relationship." _Slow down, Kagome, y__ou don't want to give _too_ much away._

She shook her head, pushing her arms off the ledge of the cliff and simply floating in the water instead. She refused to meet Sesshoumaru's eyes. "The only reason my dad pays any attention to me at all is because I remind him of my mom."

She stopped, and Sesshoumaru stared at her form in the lake water. There was a moment of pause, until he spoke for the first time in a while. "Your mother?"

She nodded and made a face. "She and Dad loved each other very much, but then she had to leave and they couldn't see each other anymore." She spoke without pausing, making her words seem as innocent as possible. She didn't want Sesshoumaru asking questions about this particularly uncomfortable piece of the story. If he pressed her for more information, she'd have to tell him about the Bone Eater's Well, the future, her identity. She wasn't about to let that happen.

"It's complicated," she made an excuse, unsure if he had been convinced or not. "Basically, my dad misses my mom. She married another man, who died just a few years after they had a son together. My brother stays with her, and he doesn't know a _thing_ about _my_ dad, except that I have a different one than he does. Dad still loves Momma though, so once he found out about Souta, he got really angry. Ever since then, he's been harder on me than ever before, so for the past ten years, things haven't been going too well.

"Now he practically pretends like I'm Momma, but he knows I'm not, so he gets even _more_ hostile towards me, even though he tries to cover it up by apologizing. Lately, he's been trying to win me over again. It's like he wants us to get close, but I know better than that. He probably wants to make a good impression on me before I have to—"

She stopped abruptly. She was ranting on and on, complaining about the passionate subject that was her father, and she had nearly spoken of her upcoming choice right in the presence of the one youkai she was trying to hide her identity from. How could she be so stupid?

Sesshoumaru looked at her strangely, she noticed. It didn't take a rocket scientist to notice the suddenly tense atmosphere. "What is it?" he drawled handsomely, prying for the first time in the conversation.

"It's nothing," she said quickly, but as long as he didn't ask any more questions, she didn't care whether or not he was convinced. "My relationship with my father is…problematic, but it's not the same for Momma and Souta. Far from it, actually." She didn't notice the strange way Sesshoumaru looked at her just then. The glint in his eyes was that of confusion and unfamiliarity, and she would've commented on it if she had noticed – but she didn't.

"Momma's never mean, even though she scolds sometimes, but that only makes sense, since she's a mother and all." The glint in the taiyoukai's eyes grew hazy, but she didn't notice that either. "Souta's a brat, and he's always messing around, but it's kind of cute, I guess. I couldn't have asked for more of an annoying, perfect younger brother, that's for sure." Now his eyes darkened at her words, the original unfamiliar look settling in. "And then there's Grandpa, and he's insane. He's always telling stories and legends, and it's all very annoying, but I couldn't imagine him any differently."

Kagome smiled, convinced she hadn't given any crucial piece of information away, although she remained as truthful as she could.

"And there you have it," she sighed, finishing up and rubbing the back of her neck a tad nervously. "I told you I'm not much of a storyteller. I've said what you wanted to hear, so if that's all, could we move on?"

Sesshoumaru, she eventually noticed, looked just barely uncomfortable, but she couldn't understand why. She convinced herself she was imagining things. It was true he had shown a lot more emotion than she could even imagine in the past few days, but – except for last night, naturally – he was definitely never _uncomfortable_. At least, that's what she told herself.

The taiyoukai made a sound in the back of his throat in agreement, blinking at her slowly enough so she could focus on the magenta stripes on his eyelids, matching the ones on his wrists and cheeks. She smiled despite herself, looking down at the bracelet Sesshoumaru had made for her, playing with it absentmindedly.

"Alright, then," she brushed off whatever unsettling feelings she held during her rant on her family. "Let's see, I'm not very creative, I guess, so why don't you tell me about your family too?" Kagome only knew little bits of information about InuTaishou, and even less about Izayoi. As for Sesshoumaru's own mother, she knew absolutely nothing at all.

"I'd rather not say," Sesshoumaru said monotonously, never seeming hesitant or awkward about the question, although he very much was both. Kagome couldn't have known with his façade though, and she could only stare at his unmoving form atop the grass, a bit shocked he refused to answer her.

"Well…" she cleared her throat lightly, "alright, if you insist. Give me a second, then, to think up something good to ask."

"Of course," he watched her closely, making her fish tail fidget under the water. Even though it wasn't too terrible, talking with Sesshoumaru like this, Kagome was still not used to being so civil with Inuyasha's "hated" brother.

She looked away from his piercing golden eyes, feeling as though he would find out exactly who she really was if he kept prying into them. She was paranoid, that was for sure, but she had every right to be. His gaze was so cold but so warm at the same time, but she didn't want to make the mistake of trusting him too much. If she remained as open and forgiving as she was right now, the smart youkai could pinpoint her lies in no time.

She cleared her throat again, staring at the cliff's grassy ledge. In thought about what to ask Sesshoumaru next, she looked up for a brief second, only to find that he was still staring at her. Unnerved at his gaze, she shifted and looked away yet again. What exactly was he trying to pull? Didn't he have anything better to do than stare at her as she thought?

Her eyes widened just a fraction, and she darted her eyes again to him. Now that she thought about it, that was a very good question.

"Alright, I've got one," she said cheerfully, plunging her arms back into the water. "It's such a simple question, I can't believe I didn't think of it earlier." She watched as he raised an eyebrow, the rest of him completely unmoving. "What are your hobbies?"

He lowered his brow, but his face hardened in a look of confusion. "Hobbies?"

"Yeah, you know," she laughed at his expression, "what do you do when you're not, I don't know, trying to kill things?"

"I don't find it particularly amusing to 'kill things', if that's what you're thinking."

"It's not," she rolled her eyes. "I'm just wondering if you ever do anything for fun or just because you like it or something. What do you do in your spare time?" She really wanted to know, now that she thought about it. Sesshoumaru had always been an enigma since she had first seen him, two years prior. If she could just grasp the fact that he was a normal guy, just like everyone else (minus the obvious differences, naturally), she figured the atmosphere would become more comfortable. She needed to know he was just like her, just as human.

_Don't be silly, Kagome. He's _not_ human, in case you forgot._

But still, to know that they could have something in common…it excited her.

He seemed to think about her question, but not too deeply. The pause between them lasted only a few seconds, at most, before he looked back at the mermaid in front of him. "Nothing," he said. "I don't have any interests."

Kagome was sure she would fall over, even in the water. "You've got to be kidding me!" she sputtered. "You mean…you don't do _anything_?"

His brow twitched in slight irritation. "Must you make it sound so pathetic?"

She shook her head, feeling like she was seeing spots in front of her eyes, similar to those times she was forced to get her picture taken the "old-fashioned way" for her school pictures. "It's just…don't you ever do something just to relax? Or just because you have nothing better to do? Don't you ever do something just for yourself, to have fun?"

He exhaled from his nose. "There is much to be done," he said calmly, immune to "Hanabi's" shock. "I do not have time to do anything as such."

Kagome frowned. "Oh c'mon, there's got to be _something_."

He shook his head at her repetitive assumptions. "And what about you?" he turned the topic back on her. "What do you do 'for fun'?"

She pressed her lips tightly together. "Oh, no you don't!" she accused. "I've already answered my question. I'm not about to answer yours just because you can't seem to think of something good."

She watched as he shut his amused eyes gently, opening them again shortly after to drown his vision within the blue-green color of the lake.

"Then I am afraid that there is nothing I do. Nothing at all."

...

Jaken chased Rin around the tiny clearing they were stationed in, not at all amused by the girl's flower wreath she stuck onto his head. It was much too small, and he could not get the wretched flowers off. Even with his demonic claws (not to mention the fact that the crown was, indeed, made out of thin, grassy stems), it was virtually impossible to get the thing off.

"You foolish girl!" he cried, waving his staff in the air and tripping over his own feet as he ran after the giggling child.

Sesshoumaru ignored all this, sitting in his usual spot in his usual position, staring out into the same line of trees. He could practically sense Ah-Uhn chuckling to itself – that is, if the heads could indeed do so – at the rather humorous display of the mischievous little girl and the ugly, green kappa. He, however, did not even glance at his wards once.

Ever since just hours before, he had been wondering sporadically to himself. Hanabi's question continued to ring in his ears, and he wasn't sure if he liked that very much.

"_What are your hobbies?" _

He scoffed at himself. Hobbies? Why would someone as important and regal as he need something as unproductive as a hobby? The only thing he ever did when he didn't have to do anything at all was sit and stare at nothing, like what he was doing now. He didn't think it was much of a hobby though.

"_Don't you ever do something just for yourself, to have fun?" _

Not likely, he mused. Taiyoukai didn't have fun anyway. What was that mermaid thinking? Perhaps it was easier for her to have a good time than it was for himself. She didn't have to deal with many demons out to kill her or worry about the infamous Shikon no Tama – he truly believed that he was one of the only ones, youkai or human, who didn't much care for the pathetic pink jewel. Surely, he thought, she did not have to worry about problems such as those, and she was therefore allowed to have more "fun" than he.

Still, it bothered him, not having a hobby. It shouldn't have annoyed him, and it shouldn't have been plaguing his mind, but for some reason, it was.

His train of thought stopped abruptly as a rather delectable scent drifted into his nose. He hummed in his throat, catching the familiar smell of green apples coming from the same direction.

It was that miko girl again, he was positive. Her scent intermixed with a few others though, and that was what captured his interest more. He had never smelt anything like that before. There were certain things he recognized, but there were so many other things intertwining with them, they seemed like completely new scents altogether.

His nose twitched at the sensations they caused his taste buds. If he were anyone else, he was certain his mouth would be watering. When was the last time he had eaten anything? And what about Jaken, Rin, and Ah-Uhn? Now that he thought about it, he hoped that Jaken had taken the initiative to feed them all, since he himself forgot.

Jaken and Ah-Uhn seemed to notice the smells as well, although their noses, not being as advanced as Sesshoumaru's, did not receive them as strongly.

"What is that?" Jaken rambled to himself, momentarily forgetting about his pursuit after the human girl. "It smells like…salmon and rice…and beef, too."

"What? What?" Rin asked him cutely, playing with the star-shaped rock around her neck. "I don't smell anything."

"Of course you don't, Rin!" he squawked. "Your human nose couldn't smell any of it unless it was right next to you!"

"I didn't ask you _that_, Master Jaken!" she fought with him. "I just want to know what it is!"

"And how am I supposed to know that? That smell's got to be coming from miles away–"

"Wait here," Sesshoumaru interrupted calmly, standing from his position without even glancing at his wards.

"Bye, Lord Sesshoumaru!" Rin's emotions made a complete 180, suddenly very cheerful again and waving goodbye.

He ignored her with good intentions, walking away at his calm, steady pace. Whatever it was the miko – Kagome, he remembered, _Kagome_ – was up to, the smells clogging up his nostrils were really very curious.

For the next few moments, his quick speed (although he was walking) brought him to the very same clearing Hanabi resided in, the same clearing where he had briefly met with _Kagome_ for two straight days, not including this one.

And there she was sitting now, on her knees in front of a crackling fire. There was a strange pot of boiling water hanging above the flames, which she was currently checking on, and beside her were many different things: strange paper cups with unusual pictures decorated on them; a large bowl of fresh, moist rice; numerous pairs of thick, wooden chopsticks; another bowl filled with crushed-up pink salmon bits; a jug of water (now nearly empty); a strange sort of material that was see-through and thin; shiny, white plates that didn't look quite usual to him; an umeboshi or two; and a myriad of other things he didn't believe he had ever seen or smelt before.

Emerging from the thick trees of the forest, he watched as the miko looked up and met his eyes. He was surprised when she only looked alarmed, but not frightened or uncomfortable. He had apologized for hurting her just yesterday, but surely that wasn't enough to make her drop all guard around him, was it? Her reaction to his presence was all very strange…

She smiled at him a little hesitantly. It was a tiny smile, the barest lifting of her lips. She immediately looked down again afterwards, shifting her body to the side to work on the rice and other things.

Sesshoumaru stepped closer and closer, eyeing the girl but not coming to the conclusion that she wanted him to leave immediately. She didn't watch him approach her, and even when he came within six or seven meters of her and stopped, she did not run away, but only looked back up at him briefly.

"Miko," he spoke to her from the distance, catching her glare but not regretting calling her what he did, "what are you doing?"

"Cooking," she said bluntly. "Kaede and Inuyasha helped me a lot today, and everyone's busy working right now, so I offered to cook by myself. There's a lot going on in the village though, so I didn't want to take up too much space there."

He thought for a moment about asking why so much was being done in the nearby village this particular day, but he decided against it, deciding the village was full of humans, and they were probably doing something ridiculous and unimportant to him.

The girl looked back down after uncovering the rice bowl, spreading out the strange, thin material over one of the plates. She next lifted the tray with the pickled umeboshi on top, settling it on her lap.

"What are you making, girl?" he furrowed his brow, having known nothing about cooking or any of the steps she was taking.

"Ramen and onigiri," she said, but he only recognized the latter. What on earth was ramen? "I was thinking of doing something different and making gahan or katsu with some dango for dessert, but I don't really have any of the ingredients right now, and it's a little too complicated tonight."

Silence weighed on them as she continued her methods. She took a handful of the rice – Sesshoumaru looked at it distastefully. Should her dirty hands really be grabbing at the food others would be eating soon? – and she carefully molded it into a rounded triangle. She picked up one plum and stuck it into the back, moving the rice around a bit more so the umeboshi wouldn't fall out. Satisfied enough by it, and not wrapping the bottom with a slice of seaweed, she set it down on the plate.

"Want to make one?" her voice stirred Sesshoumaru from his examination.

"No," he said sternly.

"Why not?" she said without hesitation. A look came over her face. "Do you not know how? It's really easy, you know, you just—"

"I understand how to do it, miko," he glared at her. "I simply do not wish to lower myself to make such ridiculous meals."

Her glare intensified the more he spoke, and he found himself rather enjoying the fire in her spirit he awakened in her, although he did not know why. "Well," she said frustratingly, "I'm sorry it isn't as fancy as any of the meals I'm sure _you_ get to eat, but it _isn't_ ridiculous. At least it feeds somebody, doesn't it?"

She didn't give him any time to answer as she turned away and checked the boiling water again. Deeming it ready, she angrily grabbed the paper cups from her side, ripping the tops open and pouring its contents – hard blocks of strange noodles and bits of beef and vegetables – into the pot. The smells of strange spices drifted into Sesshoumaru's nose once again, tickling it with a mouthwatering scent and almost making him sneeze. He wasn't going to admit it aloud, but it did smell rather good.

She stirred the noodles around, breaking them up with chopsticks, before she removed the utensils and set them aside on a paper napkin. She moved back to the onigiri, rolling yet another rice ball with a plum behind it. She put this one on a second plate, each now holding a single rice ball right in the center.

"Are you just going to stand there watching me?" the girl said coldly to him, obviously still irritated. "Isn't it a waste of time to watch such _silly _human cooking?" He just stared at her, his gaze moving from the ingredients to her hard, chocolate-brown eyes. They weren't much, he thought to himself, compared to Hanabi's brilliant blue ones. But in the back of his mind, his own thoughts disagreed with him, but he didn't pay them any notice.

"Well?" she gave him a look. "You know, you can change your mind. I'll let you make one if you want, even if you don't apologize for your rudeness."

As far as he was concerned, she was the rude one, talking back like that _again_ to the lord of the Western Lands. "No," he said after a bit of a pause. As soon as he said it, he felt a twinge of regret in the pit of his stomach.

Now that he thought about it, he wanted to make a rice ball, if just a little. It wasn't a craving or a need to mold any rice, but he was still reluctant, and he wanted to change his mind and ask the miko (_Kagome_, he always seemed to forget) to pass the food over to him so he could just try. His pride was in the way, though, and he refused to give in to the infuriating girl his brother was so intent on wooing (although the reason why Inuyasha was so infatuated with the girl was, naturally, beyond him).

"Well, fine," she muttered to herself. "You'd think the guy could just do something and relax, for once."

Sesshoumaru's keen ears caught her words, and he was taken aback.

"_It's just…don't you ever do something just to relax?" _

Hanabi's words rang through his head yet again. She was right, just as the miko was, though he was not about to admit it. Why couldn't he just lighten up for a second or two? He had no hobbies. At the rate he was going, he would never have any. All he would do for the rest of his life was kill youkai and humans both, and when he wasn't, he would just sit aside and do nothing. Was that really how he wanted to live his immortality? Was he just destined to exist and do nothing special or significant with the life he was given? He helped rid Japan from evil – he did assist in the downfall of Naraku, after all – but was he really going to do nothing but busy himself with serious annoyances like that?

When he broke out of his thoughts, he observed as Kagome (he got it right this time) emptied the salmon into the rice bowl, mixing it up as evenly as she could. Her umeboshi tray was set aside, now empty, beside her familiar big, yellow bag. She paused to stir the soba noodles in its pot, but afterwards, she was immediately set back on forming more onigiri, the seaweed now out and ready to be put to use.

"Just so you are aware," Sesshoumaru started, still not used to Kagome's lack of awkwardness around him, despite the occurrences of the past few days, "my apology towards you yesterday was of no importance whatsoever. You have no reason to act so carefree before me."

She scoffed, a rude and unladylike gesture, he believed. "Yeah, yeah, I know that," she rolled her eyes, setting down her fifth completed rice ball on the first plate. "Forgive me for treating you like a _normal_ person." His eyes narrowed minutely at her sarcasm. "And just so _you_ are aware…" She trailed off, smiling softly down at her work. "It doesn't matter to me anymore, what you think of me. You are _not_ going to stop me from trying to be the most I can be." A determined, motivated look glinted in her eyes, and he picked up on that small feature, amazed and the slightest bit impressed by the strength of her words. "I am _not_ as weak and foolish as you think, Sesshoumaru, so don't you dare judge me." She chuckled just a little before her hands stopped forming the next onigiri for just a second or two.

"I'm really…starting to change. I promise you that."

He did not respond to the last words of her monologue, at least not out loud. She truly was a silly girl, he thought. Did she really take his words two days ago so seriously? She was a weak human, just like all the others. There was nothing special about her whatsoever. She could not change, not in the way she wanted to. It was impossible.

But still…

Just yesterday he had watched her heal her wounds without struggle. Had she always been able to do that? In the past, she had mothered the fox kit, protected Rin, guarded the Shikon no Tama, fought against Naraku and all the others, learned how to use her miko ki just the slightest bit effectively (her archery skills, he had to admit, were rather impressive), and so much more. She had even defied him without a single regret. Maybe she wasn't as weak as he thought.

He nearly shook his head, but stopped himself from looking like an idiot, although the girl was currently working on her twelfth and final rice ball now, and wouldn't notice him.

If her adventurous skills weren't enough, she was still doing more beside them. She could practice leadership, baby-sit, and could read perfectly. Even now, she was cooking. Cooking was not a huge task for a woman, that was for sure, but for her, it seemed to be a mere…a mere _pastime_ for her. She wasn't cooking because it was her duty. She was doing it because she wanted to.

Next to him, he was disgruntled to say, she was much more productive with her time. And she was mortal, too. While he was unsure about where his life was leading him, she seemed to know just how to take her time and live life to the fullest. It didn't exactly glorify him, to his chagrin, being compared to her.

"Kagome!" a male voice called to the miko from the opposite side of the clearing. He emerged from the trees, staff in hand and not looking entirely pleased that the taiyoukai was standing right there.

"Oh, Miroku," she greeted with a smile, her serious tone of voice gone. "What are you doing here?"

The monk looked from her to the silver-haired youkai across the clearing. "I could ask the same about him," he stared with his violet eyes. "Kagome, what is going on?"

"Nothing," she said simply in response, stirring the "ramen" in its pot one last time. "I was just cooking dinner. Sesshoumaru was only watching. Don't worry about it, really." The monk was reluctant to believe her, but, obviously detecting no lies from the miko, he nodded. "Good," the girl continued. "Now, the ramen's done. Help me bring it back?"

He nodded slowly, fidgeting uncharacteristically under Sesshoumaru's scrutinizing stare. "Of course."

"Then here—" She handed strange gloves to him before putting some of her own on, telling him to roll up his sleeves. Still kneeling, she lifted the heavy pot and settled it into the monk's hands, causing him to drop his staff. "It's okay," she said, gesturing to it, "I'll bring that back to camp. Make sure not to touch the pot, it's really hot." She smiled at him again, stepping away.

"You aren't coming, Kagome?" he asked hesitantly, throwing another glance at Sesshoumaru.

She shook her head. "I have to put out the fire first, and I have to clean up after that. Don't worry about me though, I've got everything taken care of."

Sesshoumaru watched as she calmly handled the situation. It was all very curious, the way she was acting. She appeared much too responsible for a human, in his opinion.

"Go back to camp," she told the monk easily. He nodded and turned away, the heavy weight of the water and noodles in the pot only slowing him down a little. "Oh, and Miroku?" He turned to her, as did Sesshoumaru. "Let's not tell Inuyasha about this, okay?"

Sesshoumaru held back a smirk. He wasn't stupid. He was certain after he had brutally attacked Kagome, his younger brother was most likely furious with him. The girl was smart, warning the monk in front of her. If Inuyasha knew of the girl's audience during her cooking, he would cause quite the scene. Without anyone telling him directly about his presence, Inuyasha would probably not know about it; after all, the spicy scents of all the cooking ingredients were most likely already drowning out Sesshoumaru's own scent.

"Of course," the monk said after some thought. It was a wise move, Sesshoumaru mentally commented. It wasn't long before the silhouette of the monk disappeared within the trees, and by the time Sesshoumaru looked down again, the fire was nearly out, having been smothered with the leftover water and some nearby dirt.

The girl opened her yellow bag, putting all the little ingredients inside it, save for the two plates of onigiri and the strange transparent material. He wondered if she was still aware of his gaze, as her eyes were staring straight in front of her as though she were deep in thought. She took a small bottle from the pocket of her strange, indecent skirt, a purple liquid swirling inside it. He knew she forgot about him now, as he watched her pour the entire contents of the bottle over each and every one of the onigiri on one plate.

She threw the clear bottle in her bag afterwards, wrapping the plate with the strange material (he heard her muttering under her breath, and he believed the material to be called "plastic"). She looked up for just a second and met Sesshoumaru's eyes. He noticed a strange emotion swimming inside of her brown orbs, but he couldn't pinpoint what it was exactly.

"Oh," she said softly. "Sorry, would you like some? There were supposed to be two per person, but I have a few extra. You can have them, if you want, even though you were an ass to me just now."

She really was a vulgar girl, wasn't she?

"No," he said reluctantly. "I do not want them."

"Well, fine," she sighed loudly. "But just in case…" She scurried through her bag, pulling out more of the "plastic". From the second, uncovered plate, she removed two salmon rice balls and placed them on the plastic, which she then put on top of the grass by her knees.

"I said I do not want them, miko," he said to her again.

Annoyed, she glared at him, irritated with how he had yet to call her by her name. "And _I_ said it was _just in case_. If you don't want them, give them to Rin. I'm sure she'd like it."

Sesshoumaru agreed with her. Like he noticed earlier, he wasn't even certain how often Rin was able to eat. It had never really concerned him before, never having felt the pain of hunger. He said nothing, however, and she, in turn, said nothing more herself.

After re-covering the original plate, she stood, grabbing her bag on her way up and settling it on her shoulders. She picked up the plates and dusted her clothes off with her free hand, turning around to go back to her village without another look at the taiyoukai.

"Later, Sesshoumaru," she said over her shoulder, walking away and leaving him alone with the leftover rice balls. She had disappeared.

In silence, he stared at the plastic on the other end of the clearing from him. He scoffed to himself. He did not need her charity, nor her food. She had touched the rice and salmon with her filthy human hands, and he would not allow himself or Rin to eat it.

He turned away, already taking a few steps toward where his wards were settled. But he stopped in his tracks as the scent of the food tantalized his sensitive nose yet again. It really did smell very good. And Rin was probably hungry. The miko had put her time and effort into those onigiri, and he couldn't very well allow them to sit there until bugs or wild animals or youkai ate the food that could have helped his human ward.

He turned back, hesitant but moving towards the plastic with the food lying on it. When he stood right in front of it, he stilled and stared at it for quite some time before eventually leaning over and picking it up. He stared at it, sniffing and detecting the miko's scent of apples woven into the food.

He should have made one of those rice balls, he mused. He regretted not even trying. He stored the thought away in his mind, turning and beginning his ten-mile trek back to his subordinates.

Perhaps, he considered, cooking could be a good hobby.

...

Sango wished she could understand whatever language cats knew how to speak because Kirara was having a fit. The sun was only just starting to go down, and after an exhausting afternoon of training and running around in the heat, the only thing she wanted to do was crash onto her futon and go to sleep. Her Hiraikotsu seemed to weigh an extra twenty pounds under her tense muscles, but she never had the chance to drop it to the ground and relieve herself of it.

Kirara thrashed around in circles, having already burst into flames and transforming into her larger body, and no matter how much Sango tried to console her, she only panicked even more wildly. If Sango didn't know any better, she'd say Kirara was acting like a spooked horse, raising up to her hind legs and clawing at the air in front of her.

"Kirara!" she cried. "Kirara, calm down! What's wrong? Kirara?" She couldn't let anything go wrong. She couldn't let her pet, her friend, act this way and possibly hurt herself. Sango couldn't remember the last time she had been so worried, and Kirara's bucking and loud cries were beyond unnerving. She had never been afraid of her own cat before, but she was certainly afraid _for_ her now. She hesitantly took a few steps toward her, reaching up to grab a fistful of her fur to push her four paws to the floor. "Kirara? Come on girl, what's wrong?"

The youkai mewed loudly, and after a quick shuffling of her paws and a bristle of her fur, she leaned down in front of Sango, who understood and climbed onto her back.

Sango didn't know what was wrong. Looking quickly to the pink sky, she couldn't see any sign of smoke, no flare of some nearby village in trouble, no demonic auras, nothing. The weather wasn't particularly different than any other day, there was no chill in the air, and everything appeared perfectly normal…all but Kirara's sudden panic. That most certainly was _not_ normal.

Kirara pushed herself off the ground and flew into the air, and for once, Sango had to hug her cat tightly around the neck in fear of falling off. She nearly burned her heel right off when Kirara's flames burst higher and with more life than necessary. "Kirara, where are you taking me? What's going on?" But her voice was drowned out by the mad rush of air in her face.

It wasn't long before Kirara finally began to descend back to land, but the wind pressure made the ride feel much longer than it really was, and the cold air made Sango's eyes sting and water. Through her blurry vision, she could vaguely see a thin river in front of them, something black half-buried in the water. The water moved downhill, and the rapids pushed the black thing back and forth against a rock until Sango wiped her eyes and realized the large mass looked sort of familiar to her.

She took a step closer, and she suddenly felt a chill creep up her spine. She was as cold as ice, as cold as the water in the river, as cold as the stiff body with the face that was all too hauntingly similar to hers.

She rushed forward and fell to her knees, pulling the body out of the river with all the strength she had left, ripping the black cloth he wore because it was stuck on a stray branch underwater. She faintly noticed the dark red color stained on the rock the body was leaning against, faintly felt her muscles searing with overuse, and faintly heard the loud roar Kirara cried, a roar that was filled to the brim with mourning.

Because there in Sango's arms lay Kohaku. And he wasn't breathing.

...

A/N: REVISIONS ARE ALL DONE! Ahhh, so happy! That took forever, my gosh. I hope you liked the little portion at the end with Sango because that's a new addition (it wasn't in my original story, but I wrote it up just now). Keep in mind that her storyline is DEFINITELY going to be crossing with Kagome/Sesshoumaru's. It'll make it more interesting, I promise. And no, it won't be a love triangle either.

Anyway, to clear up the confusion: Sesshoumaru is NOT going to be a chef. Haha, sorry! The point of the last sentence is just to show how he realizes how empty his life is. That's it.

**Whoever draws a picture of Sesshoumaru in a chef's hat will be my favorite person.**


	10. flight

...

**the mermaid**  
by mystical spirits

**[flight]**

"_How does it feel to be one of the beautiful people, now that you know who you are?"_  
—"_Baby, You're a Rich Man" by Lennon/McCartney__—_

_...  
_

Up and down.

Up and down.

Up and down.

Sango's dark eyes watched each and every tiny movement of her brother's body, although his breathing was shallow, and the rise and fall of his chest was almost impossible to notice.

He was barely hanging on.

She wasn't sure how exactly he managed to survive after yet another near-death experience. She could barely remember the way she pounded her hands against his ribcage frantically, or the way Kohaku had weakly coughed up water after she had somehow managed to perform mouth-to-mouth, the way Kagome showed her how to do it. The whole moment was just a blur to her. Her mind had almost completely shut down once she realized he wasn't breathing, and she considered herself lucky that despite the shock, her body moved on autopilot and successfully saved Kohaku's life – how long that would last, however, she didn't know.

Kirara mewed softly and brushed against Sango's lifeless hand. Even the fire-cat knew Sango needed to get some sleep. For the past few days, since Kohaku's body washed up on the shore, she had only moved from his side to make a fire, get food, or dampen another warm cloth to lay against Kohaku's forehead. Resting was out of the question. There were more important things that had to be done, specifically, waiting for the exact moment when Kohaku would wake up and they would go back to Inuyasha and the others and everything would be okay again.

Sango knew it was a silly thing to hope for. But she couldn't lose that hope now, not when she really needed it the most.

She let Kirara push her way underneath her limp hand, but she couldn't find the will or energy to pet her cat herself. She knew it would probably comfort her and make her feel more relaxed, but with her little brother's life hanging on a thread, she felt she didn't deserve to calm down. Not when Kohaku could leave her for good any second now.

If only she had found him sooner. If only she had moved faster. If only she had protected him better in the past, if only she had let him borrow her taijiya mask after she got home from her first extermination years ago, if only she had shared her sweets with him when they were only kids…

She wasn't thinking straight. Their childhood had nothing to do with this mess. She knew she couldn't have done anything to avoid this situation. She knew most of this wasn't her fault, but Naraku's. But even though she knew all this, she couldn't help but feel the need to be responsible. She was Kohaku's older sister. She was _supposed_ to be able to _take care of him_.

Looking down at Kohaku's pale, clammy face that was still so very young and innocent, Sango felt like she had failed him completely.

But this was not the time to give up. It didn't matter that she was sleep deprived or depressed or beating herself up for everything that had happened. Her misery could not get in the way.

Because even though Kohaku's chances were slim, she would keep praying. And because even though he was barely breathing and had trouble keeping down the water she forced down his throat, he was still alive.

Through her tears, Sango felt her lips tilt upwards in the tiniest and weakest of smiles.

_He was still alive._

..._  
_

Three days had passed. Three. Long. Days.

When he thought about it, it didn't seem like a very long time, but somehow those three days felt like forever. It didn't feel like he had been meeting Hanabi every night for just over a week – in fact, tonight would be their eighth rendezvous (not that he was counting, and not including the first night he found her at the lake). But after everything that had happened, after all the confusing thoughts that plagued his mind ever since the miko offered him freshly-cooked food, life seemed to be taking its time when it came to Sesshoumaru.

He hadn't seen the girl since that day. Hanabi never again brought her up in conversation, and Sesshoumaru had received no more surprise visits from Inuyasha, despite the fact that he was probably still infuriated about the "Kagome slice-'n-dice" incident in the forest. It was clear his half-brother was very protective when it came to the miko girl, and after getting so violent with her last week, Sesshoumaru was surprised Inuyasha hadn't stormed into the clearing and tried to slice his other arm off…_tried_ being the key word, of course.

But there he went, thinking about that infuriating woman yet again. He couldn't have cared less about her as a person, let alone a female (after all, it was Hanabi he was interested in, not the miko), but it was the things she had said, the things she had done, the possibilities she had ignited in his mind that pestered at him even three days later.

It was all Hanabi's fault, really. She just _had_ to ask Sesshoumaru about what he liked to do in his spare time, and ever since then, he felt very unsatisfied. His unsettling feelings only grew worse after watching the miko make supper for her friends that day, and he suddenly really wanted to have a so-called "hobby" of his own. It frustrated him to no end that he actually wanted something so stupid so badly.

But just sitting underneath a tree all day until it was time to meet Hanabi (like what he was doing right now)…well, he couldn't help but feel useless.

And that just didn't sit well with him.

He _never_ felt useless. Never. Never in his entire life. It was always his duty to get stronger, to know what was going on around him, to protect his wards and rule his land. He lived his life being independent and responsible, but after over a week of being foolish and chasing after a girl he could only see after midnight, he was starting to feel a bit insecure. Actually, he was getting almost desperate. He needed to find some order in his life to balance out his impulsive meetings with Hanabi. The only problem was…he didn't know where he was supposed to start.

Which would always bring his thoughts back to the miko again.

He had seen her read. He had seen her cook. And judging by the way she had easily healed the cuts on her neck before, she spent some time training as well. Adding all that with her laughing with her friends, practically babysitting Inuyasha, and searching for shards of the Shikon Jewel, Sesshoumaru had to admit that she seemed like a well-rounded person, especially compared to all the other lowlife humans he had never quite become accustomed to. And although Sesshoumaru would never dare to utter it out loud, he had to admit that she was rather inspiring.

But just when it came to "hobbies", of course.

For the past three days, Sesshoumaru closely observed whoever he could. Jaken was difficult to figure out simply because he wouldn't let himself have fun in front of his dear "Lord Sesshoumaru", unless yelling at Rin could be considered a hobby. The only other people he communicated with, however, were Hanabi and Rin. They were similar, he noticed, in that they both enjoyed doing something with their hands: making jewelry, picking flowers, combing out their hair, and many other feminine things Sesshoumaru wouldn't be caught dead doing. (That one time he made Hanabi a bracelet simply _did not_ count, he assured himself.)

He was at a loss. He couldn't think of anything he could possibly do instead of sitting still for hours on end. And besides, weren't hobbies supposed to come naturally? Did it count if he just randomly decided what he was going to enjoy doing from now on?

All he knew was that he wouldn't like making things. Like Hanabi had commented before, he was the "killing perfection" – he was a killer, not a creator. It was why Tenseiga was the sword he used the least. He did not particularly enjoy creating life, and he knew it would be the same when it came to everything else: he could not make something beautiful or artistic, he could not cook a delicious meal, and he could not build anything from scratch.

It only made sense that if he could not create, he could destroy.

But then that felt like cheating. If he understood correctly, a "hobby" was something to do _in his spare time_. In the past, he would kill humans and demons often, destroying landscapes and knocking down trees and mountains in the process. Those things were just everyday activities to him. They could never be hobbies.

And so he would reach yet another dead end. Thinking so intently on this subject was getting him absolutely nowhere, and it was beyond frustrating.

He didn't want to ask Hanabi for help. He was sure she had forgotten about her "hobby" question by now anyway, and besides, he was never really one to ask for help in the first place. This was something he had to figure out on his own, however long it may take.

He wouldn't want to bore Hanabi with his thoughts anyway. Throughout the past week, he had been working so hard to impress her without seeming too obvious about his intentions, and he wasn't about to drive her off because of something so stupid. When he was with her at night, he made it a point to listen to what she had to say. He wanted to know everything about her. He hated talking about himself. It was why he tended to change the subject whenever she started to ask him the more personal questions.

But although that tactic seemed to be working, there was still this strange feeling of emptiness that he couldn't quite put his finger on. It wasn't just a feeling he had when he was with Hanabi; it was a feeling he was starting to have all the time, every day, and he didn't know what to make of it.

Whatever it was, he needed a distraction, something to keep him occupied until it was time to meet with Hanabi again. But wait – this was just bringing his thoughts back to "hobbies" again. Since when had his thoughts become so circular? He really _was_ getting nowhere.

So, Sesshoumaru decided, maybe it was time to start going _somewhere_ instead.

He stood from his spot under the tree, and began to walk away with long strides. He headed south, away from Hanabi's clearing, away from Inuyasha and that miko girl, and away from everything else that could muddle his thoughts.

"My lord!" Jaken squawked, and Sesshoumaru realized he had forgotten about his wards completely, with his mind going haywire. "Are we finally leaving? Where to next, my lord?"

He fought the urge to roll his eyes. "Stay here."

"But my lord! You do not mean to say that you are leaving us behind?" Sesshoumaru had already turned his back to the green imp, but he could still practically hear Jaken's eyes beginning to water. He decided he didn't want to even bother answering.

"I think Lord Sesshoumaru is going for a walk," Rin said calmly.

"Foolish girl!" Jaken turned to her angrily, clenching his fists while he sobbed. "Lord Sesshoumaru does not walk unless he has somewhere he wants to go!"

"Oh yeah? How do you know? Have you even asked him before?"

"I don't need to. Lord Sesshoumaru does _not_ take walks. I am his most trusted servant, and I know him like the back of my hand! Isn't that right, Lord Sesshoumaru?" He turned his head towards his master, but Sesshoumaru had already started to walk further and further away. "My lord? My lord!"

"Stay here, Jaken."

"But my lord…!"

"You too, Rin."

"Yes, Lord Sesshoumaru!"

"But _my lord_!"

With another long stride, Sesshoumaru disappeared into the trees, and successfully rid himself from the annoying voice that belonged to Jaken. If the toad wasn't so loyal and easy to take his anger out on, he would have gotten rid of his pesky ward long ago.

But still, something Jaken said was working its way into his thoughts. No, this Sesshoumaru did not take walks. He always knew where he was going. He did not waste his time on trivial matters such as this. So then, why _was_ he doing this? To think? To get his thoughts in order? He could have just done all that while sitting under the tree; it had worked for him so far, after all. But he was becoming more and more restless, and he couldn't stand to just sit there in that clearing for much longer. Walking gave him something to do, something that required no extra thought or concentration, but could still get him places – and more than anything, he needed to _get somewhere_, if not with his thoughts, than with his feet.

The more he walked, the more he thought. About his situation, about Hanabi, about that infuriating miko girl who was making him think so much in the first place. And the more his thoughts circled around in his head, the more he realized that although he was making more progress than before, he was still not getting anywhere very quickly.

So he decided to speed things up a bit.

With his demonic energy, he boosted his speed and starting running so quickly, it was like he was flying through the trees. He was going so fast, he could barely feel anything at all: the sun, the wind, the floor, all of it was a blur. After going for only a few miles, he skid to a stop. It wasn't helping. The speed was making him move, yes, but it was all so thoughtless and easy that Sesshoumaru had stopped his thinking entirely. Somehow, that was a lot less helpful than just walking or sitting was.

Shutting his eyes for a while, Sesshoumaru calmed himself down. Although he knew no one would be able to tell that he was going through an inner struggle, it didn't change the fact that it was still happening to him. These strange feelings building up inside him – the restlessness, the discomfort, the way he felt so dissatisfied with himself for some reason – it was starting to get to him, and he needed to deal with it as soon as possible. But if walking didn't work, and if his speed just made it worse…what else could he do?

Of course he knew the answer. Of course. But the solution was much too _human_ for his tastes. Were his thoughts really so important to sort out that he would lower himself to a _human's_ level to get order back into his life?

Yes, he decided. As horrified as he was to admit it, this was the only way.

But naturally he was reluctant to do it. He hated being associated with anything human to begin with; it was already bad enough that his family had to soil itself with a hanyou like Inuyasha, but for Sesshoumaru to take on a trait of the human people he couldn't stand? It was almost too much. But then again, it wasn't like anyone would see him. He still had his demon senses, and he would still be able to tell if anyone was getting close, and then he could stop what he was doing before anyone ever noticed.

So yes, he would do it. If it meant getting rid of this unsettling feeling in his gut, then yes, he would throw away his pride where no one could see him do so.

And with that thought, he turned around and began to walk again. His steady pace started to get faster, almost like a trot. And then he began to pick up more speed, starting to move his legs back and forth in a way he wasn't used to. It wasn't long before his one arm began to move as well, pushing him forward and deeper into the forest.

Sesshoumaru was running. But it wasn't the same running as before – he wasn't flying or whipping past everything around him. He was just…running. It was faster than a jog, but much slower than he was used to. He was running _like a human_, with his single arm swinging back and forth and his hair flying behind him, his heavy clothes and armor suddenly feeling very much in the way.

It was really very embarrassing, and Sesshoumaru felt rather foolish. But his cold, indifferent expression did not change because suddenly, his thoughts started to rush back to him, and he lost himself completely.

_Hanabi was beautiful._

_The miko was interesting._

_He would find a "hobby" if he gave it time._

His thoughts were starting to separate themselves. No longer was he confused and troubled, mixing up every issue and complicated thought until he lost track of what the problem was anymore. After thinking about one thing, he was suddenly able to move on to the next. He wasn't going back and forth anymore, no longer going around in circles and getting frustrated because of it. In fact, he could barely remember why it was so hard for him to get through his thoughts like this before. How could he bother himself with all his problems and conflicting emotions when he was running like this?

Again, he closed his eyes. After all, he didn't need his sight when his demonic powers could alert him of his surroundings. But by closing off his eyes, he began to really _see_ more than ever before.

Had there always been a stream over there? He could hear the tiny trickling sound at his left. Did the tiny blossoms in those trees really smell like that? The scent wafted down to him so lightly, he wasn't surprised he had missed it before. Was this how it felt when the wind blew through his hair? It was really rather refreshing, now that he knew what it was like.

He opened his eyes again, and somehow things started to look even clearer than ever before. With his feet still moving beneath him, Sesshoumaru let his eyes wander. He had grown up around sceneries like this one. He knew this forest backwards and forwards, having been here countless times before. But now, for some reason, it seemed a little different.

With surroundings this peaceful, this serene, how had he ever become a ruthless killing machine of a demon? How had other demons – and humans alike – ever become so cruel? And how, among all this strange thinking going on in his head, did he almost miss the familiar clearing in front of him?

He immediately stopped in his tracks. He stood still, tall, proud, like he always had before. Without even realizing it, he had been running for miles and miles, and he was back where he started – no, not back where he started. He was in the clearing where he had disappeared to every night, the clearing that would become a lake at midnight, where Hanabi was surely waiting for him on the other side of the barrier. But although he had subconsciously come back here, something was different. He felt the same excitement, the same anxiousness as always, unable to wait until he could see Hanabi again, but at the same time, he felt more at peace with himself. He did not feel so useless, so unworthy of being seen by Hanabi again. He still felt small compared to her, still felt like she had complete and total power over him, but he was no longer ashamed of it. In fact, his run had just made him want to see her even more.

And she wasn't the only one he was eager to see. He didn't know why it was exactly, but when her scent drifted to his sensitive nose for the first time in three days, he couldn't help but head towards her aura. He wasn't interested in her exactly, he told himself, but every time he saw her, she ignited a new fire within him, and although it infuriated him to no end, he appreciated the way it made his life a lot more interesting.

Sesshoumaru turned away from the clearing, the clearing he would return to later that night, and began to walk in his usual long strides toward the familiar presence of that silly miko girl.

The closer he got to her, the more he noticed that her usual scent (which was surprisingly nice for a human, not that he would ever admit it) was really rather foul. She was starting to smell like the other humans he had encountered over the years, and if he were anyone else, he would have scrunched up his nose and covered it with his sleeve. Despite the stench, however, he continued to move closer and closer to her.

When he finally found her, she was running along a trail in even less clothes than usual. He frowned. She looked absolutely awful in almost every way. Aside from her indecent clothes – her arms and collarbone were completely bare, and her legs were just as exposed as ever – she looked dirty and utterly exhausted. Her hair was matted and looked tangled into knots, although it was piled on her head in the same way the demon slayer often wore it. Her skin and clothes were wet with sweat, and one of her forearms looked scraped up, as though she had tripped and caught herself on a tree. She was breathing hard and looked as though she would keel over any moment now.

Sesshoumaru found he was very unhappy about two things. First of all, he was not amused by the fact that she was running in the same way he had been for the past hour or so, especially considering how horrible she looked doing it. And second:

He absolutely hated himself for thinking she was actually appealing in this state.

Honestly, did she know what she looked like, with her skin glistening with sweat and her body exposed to nearby observant eyes?

He stopped. _Why_ was he even _thinking_ like this in the first place?

He took another look at her when he noticed she had stopped running entirely, leaning against a tree to catch her breath. And then he noticed something else. It was only natural that he let his thoughts wander and let himself think she was somewhat attractive, what with that goofy smile on her face.

Because even though she looked like she was about to fall over from her run, and although she looked and smelled disgusting, there was a certain glow about her, a glow he had never seen before, that made even his cold heart skip a beat.

She smiled through her gasping for breath, and although it was very unorthodox, Sesshoumaru couldn't help but want to smile as well – but he wouldn't, of course. Despite how much he hated himself for thinking she was...physically acceptable, her smile made his mood a little better, similar to how his run made him relax and feel at peace. He didn't understand what was happening to him or why, but he wasn't sure he even wanted to.

Before he could stop himself, he walked out of the forest and onto the trail where she stood, and she looked up at him so quickly, he swore he heard her neck crack. He found it odd that even though her eyes were wide with surprise at his presence, the glow around her still didn't go away. He didn't think it natural, especially since he was still her enemy, even after their last civil meeting.

"Sess…Sesshoumaru?" she panted, wiping the back of her hand against her wet forehead. "W-what are you doing here?"

He took a while to answer, looking at her with a deadpanned gaze. "I could ask you the same question, miko."

He was certain she would scold him for calling her that yet again, not that he cared, but he was surprised when she ignored it completely. "I'm training. What does it look like I'm doing?" That attitude of hers needed an adjustment, honestly.

"Miko…" he said in a warning tone, but she had already turned her back on him, getting up from her position against the tree and walking away. It didn't settle well with him. _No one_ ever turned their back on _him_. Narrowing his eyebrows, which he found he often did when around her, he followed her as she made her way down the trail.

"Why are you following me?" she asked, but her voice didn't have an ounce of accusation or annoyance in it.

Sesshoumaru thought about it for a while. Why _was_ he following her? True, he had wanted to see her in the first place, but even he didn't know why that was. If anything, he should be wanting to get away from her, what with the stench of her body odor irritating his nose. But something about her was making him stay. Running through the possibilities in his head, he finally realized what it was: he wanted to know why she was smiling so much. Of course, the satisfaction of figuring out an answer to his question – which happened to be the same answer to her question as well – was quickly cast aside. Why should it matter to him if she was smiling like that? It had nothing to do with him. If anything, it probably had something to do with Inuyasha or that training of hers or something equally as unimpressive.

He wondered why he even cared in the first place.

Following her in silence, she led the way to a thin river, which she plopped down in front of very ungracefully. He watched her cup her hands into the water and take a much-needed drink, and he frowned at the very human-like behavior.

"Well?" she asked after she swallowed. After so many minutes of silence, he wasn't expecting her to break it so abruptly. Then again, he supposed she would have said something eventually. She was very annoying and talkative, so naturally she would press him to answer her earlier question. He was about to ignore her, but after taking another look at that foolish grin of hers, he couldn't help but ask.

"Why are you so happy, miko?"

Her smile suddenly got smaller. He was certain that if she wasn't so giddy right now, she would be glaring at him intensely. "Why, what's wrong with being happy?"

He wouldn't know. He was very rarely happy to begin with, after all.

"It's unnerving," he said instead, looking down at her as she rolled her eyes and turned away from him.

"Well, sorry to offend you, but I don't think I'm going to stop 'being happy' anytime soon." She cupped her hands in the cool water again, but instead of drinking it, like Sesshoumaru thought she would, she splashed it against her face. Sweat and dirt could be seen in the droplets of water that fell down her nose and cheeks, but Sesshoumaru almost missed that entirely. He was too focused on the way she looked with the water caressing her heart-shaped face on its way down to her neck, the neck he had scratched up just a few days before. That day, he never noticed how thin and elegant her neck looked, but now, as he watched her wash her face-

He stopped himself. What was he thinking? This was the miko girl his half-brother was so infatuated with, the human girl who dressed indecently and disrespected him every time they saw each other. How could he be thinking about her in a way similar to how he thought of Hanabi? The heat was surely getting to him. Maybe running and clearing his mind earlier hadn't been a good idea after all.

In a desperate attempt to distract himself from the silly, immature thoughts running around in his head, he instead glared at this girl, Kagome, and answered her, determined to get to the bottom of her smiles. "And why is that?"

"You wouldn't understand," she said without missing a beat. Before he could open his mouth to protest and ask another question, she changed the subject. "But enough about me. You still haven't told me what you're doing here."

He frowned. He was going to keep his running to himself, thank you very much. He would die before telling anyone, let alone this human wench, about how much he enjoyed running in a very non-demon way.

"You wouldn't understand," he mocked instead.

She sighed frustratingly and let the sun dry her face, which was still wet, although less dirty than before. "Fine then. Ugh, you're so difficult."

She turned away from him again, getting up from the grass and brushing herself off before walking towards him. Without a glance in his direction, she sat at the base of the tree next to him, basking in its shade. Sesshoumaru wondered why exactly she decided to sit by him when she made it very clear that he was annoying her. Then he realized that he was doing the very same thing: approaching her on the road even though he could barely stand her presence.

"I ran three miles today." He just looked at her. Three miles was very unimpressive, considering he probably ran at least five times the distance. "Hey, don't look at me like that. It's hot outside and I'm a horrible runner. I think I did a pretty good job."

"Is that so?"

"That's right, and once I catch my breath, I'm heading back. That makes _six_ miles today. Pretty cool, huh?"

Sesshoumaru looked at her strangely. She always had a very unusual way of speaking, and it was definitely taking some time to get used to. Either way, he found her excitement over something as silly as mileage very curious. He didn't see why six miles was something to be so happy about. And speaking of happiness, he doubted this run of hers was what was making her smile so much. _His_ run may have relaxed him and gotten his thoughts sorted out, but he doubted it was the same with her. Like she said, she hated running. So if she was doing something she hated so much, how was it that she could still smile like that?

"Look, I'm trying to start conversation here." He turned to her, and was both amused and annoyed at the expression on her face. She looked irritated at him, but there was an air of sleepiness and joy around her that made her frustration with him unconvincing.

"I am not one to converse often," he drawled.

"Well yeah," she laughed, "I know that. But you could at least try. Especially since you're the one who followed me here."

Sesshoumaru frowned. He didn't like to be teased so openly, and with this miko girl laughing at him, he felt very unthreatening. As a powerful taiyoukai, he wasn't used to the lack of power he had around people. Why had he sought out the miko again? She was frustrating to no end, and he turned around. "In that case, I am leaving."

Before he could take a single step, she cried out. "Hey, wait! Where are you going?" He looked over his shoulder at her with a disgruntled look in his eye. "Fine, fine, I'm sorry. Don't get so angry. Look, if it makes you feel any better, I'm happy because I found out some good news today. That's all, okay?"

He scoffed, "I fail to see how that would make me 'feel better'."

She stood up and shrugged. "I don't know. Isn't that why you followed me in the first place? Though I don't see why you'd get so worked up over it. I'm happy because something good happened to me, so isn't that a good thing?"

Sesshoumaru couldn't find an immediate way to answer. Happiness was something to be desired, that much he knew, but she described it so easily and innocently, it made him feel sort of…envious. Because after all— "Happiness does not come so easily to everyone, miko."

She looked taken aback, and with good reason. Sesshoumaru knew he had accidentally opened himself up to this Kagome girl, even though it wasn't much, and in a desperate attempt to save face, he turned away from her again and started to walk away. He hadn't gotten very far when her voice called out to him, and he was stunned for what seemed to be the millionth time because of her. He stopped in his tracks and felt a tiny hint of uneasiness creeping back inside him.

"But you're happy today too, aren't you?"

He slowly turned his head to look at her, his eyes narrowed because she spoke as though she knew him, which she most certainly didn't. But all the same, her words struck something in him, and he was suddenly very curious. Even though he denied it, the miko always seemed to know something about him that he didn't know himself. It was unnerving, but somehow, he found it very comforting as well. Because even if he lost himself, she would always say something that would get him back on track again.

"Excuse me?"

She smiled, and he was again dazed at how much of an affect she was having on him. "You seem different today, that's all. Even though you're angry, you don't look like you're about to kill me, and when we bumped into each other, you were a lot calmer than usual. So something good must have happened to you too, right?"

He froze. He knew exactly what it was that made him calm, but did that mean it really made him happy too? During his run, he never once felt the urge to smile, but maybe that was to be expected. After all, Sesshoumaru never smiled.

He looked at the miko behind him. She was staring at him so contently, like she was so sure of herself, and he was again reminded of how she could so easily say the things he knew were true, but which he couldn't quite put words to. She always made him think twice. If it hadn't been for her talkative chatter, he would never have thought for days about finding a "hobby" or something to do with his time. He never would have started running like a human man. He never would have been able to sort through all his conflicting thoughts and emotions, and he never would have been able to feel at peace with himself. He never would have been able to feel such relief.

And then it hit him. The run had indeed caused him relief, caused him to relax and settle the thoughts in his mind, but without even realizing it, without even wanting to admit it—

Running had made Sesshoumaru happy.

He wasn't sure if that was a good thing or a bad thing. Happiness was weakness, and after training and working so hard to become the frightening, threatening taiyoukai and lord of the western lands, weakness was the last thing he wanted. And besides, he did not deserve to be happy, with all the people and demons he'd killed throughout his life…and for not regretting it, either.

But even though Sesshoumaru knew all this, and even though the last thing anyone could ever imagine was "a happy Sesshoumaru," he couldn't help but be grateful. Maybe even he needed to feel something other than indifference and hatred. And besides, if this feeling he got when he was running was really happiness, then there were other things that made him happy too.

Rin, with her cute smile and easy way of understanding.

Hanabi, with her acceptance and way of listening to what he had to say, which really wasn't much.

And even…_maybe_ even this miko girl, with her advice and questions and way of getting him to think about himself, not in a conceited manner, but in a way that made him want to change. Taking another look at the insufferable, annoying, loud-mouthed girl against the tree, he realized that her smile, that radiant and contagious smile, was another thing that made him (regrettably) happy. He wasn't quite sure how to feel about that.

"Well, what was it?"

Her voice brought him back to reality, and even though he could still see her smile from where he stood, he could also still see how dirty and sweaty she was, and how her tangled hair was still in her face, and how improper her clothing looked. Focusing on the worst parts of her, he shrugged aside his thoughts of her being pleasing to look at, and how she was leaving an impression on him. When he spoke again, his voice was just as cold as ever. "What?"

"What happened that made you so happy?"

He took one last look at her disheveled appearance and cheery form before turning his back and walking away.

"This Sesshoumaru ran."

And with that, he disappeared in the darkness of the forest, leaving her behind and heading back towards his camp. Rin and Ah-Uhn were probably hungry, and Jaken was probably fretting and causing a scene. He had wasted too much time already, stopping to pay a visit to the headache that was the miko girl. The sky would be getting darker soon, and then a few hours after that, he would be able to see Hanabi again.

Once he was sure the girl was out of his sight, and that there was no one else around, his walk again turned into a slight trot, and soon his arms and legs were moving together as he sprinted. He ran away from the miko, away from the clearing with Hanabi and her lake, away from the things that confused him, and made his way towards his wards, which would bring him back to reality, the reality he so needed.

A quick image of the miko flashed in his mind, her words weighing on him (though not as heavily as before), and his running made him think even more. Maybe it was okay for him to think she was a bit attractive, for a human, at least. It didn't mean anything; it was just a passing thought. His meetings with Hanabi were confusing him. Just because a girl wasn't hideous, it did not mean he had any more-than-friendly feelings for her (and in fact, he could hardly consider the miko to be a "friend" in the first place). It was Hanabi he was interested in, after all, not the miko, who was taken by his half-brother anyway.

He breathed through his sensitive nose and calmed himself down. This run was just as helpful as the first. He was already noticing the changes he underwent because of these sprints, like how he was finally able to look around at his surroundings, and how he was able to have plenty of time to think. Not to mention, running was giving him exercise as well – not that he needed it, but it was still a plus.

But for some reason, Sesshoumaru felt himself frowning. It took him a while to realize that the empty feeling from earlier was eating away at him again. It was the same emptiness he felt the past few days while he waited for Hanabi, the same emptiness he had been feeling more and more intensely as the days went by. But this time, the feeling had a name. He wasn't sure why he felt this way, especially since he was able to speak with Hanabi so often. All he knew, to his chagrin, was that this feeling was the strongest when he thought about the insufferable miko Kagome.

But that was silly. Because why would Lord Sesshoumaru of the Western Lands ever feel lonely when he wasn't around the miko?

...

"Aren't you done yet?"

She rolled her eyes, thrusting a bowl of instant ramen into the hanyou's face. He was so inconsiderate! He was the one who encouraged her to train harder, yet here he was, bugging her to make him food as soon as she got back from her jog. She hadn't even cleaned herself up yet, and she was sure she didn't smell very nice. If there was anything Kagome hated, it was feeling dirty. If there was anything she hated even more, it was being bossed around to make something as simple as instant ramen. "Yeah, yeah, Inuyasha. Here's yours, now quit whining."

"Kagome," Shippou cried, clinging on to her arm, "how come Inuyasha gets food first? No fair!"

Inuyasha just scoffed, talking with his mouth full of noodles. "It's because she knows I need food more than you, twerp. Quit cryin'!"

"Actually," Miroku deadpanned, "it's because she thought you would shut up once you filled that giant mouth of yours." He grimaced at the way he chewed his food with his mouth open. "Guess not."

Despite herself, Kagome laughed at the look on Inuyasha's face and handed a bowl to the kitsune, knowing that Miroku wouldn't cause a fuss if he got fed last. The laugh, however, caught her friends' attention. "What?"

Thankfully, Inuyasha swallowed before answering her. "What are you so happy about?"

Really, was _everyone_ going to ask her that question today? "What do you mean? Miroku said something funny. Why _wouldn't_ I laugh?"

"Because Inuyasha's still being a jerk," Shippou said. "You haven't even told him to 'sit' yet!"

"Do you think I should?"

"YES!"

"Shut up, you stupid fox!" Inuyasha reached over and tried to hit him on the head.

"Kagome! Tell him to 'sit'! Tell him, tell him!"

She shared a look with Miroku, who sighed at their friends' antics and accepted the ramen bowl gratefully. "I think you are getting off topic here," he said. "I thought we were inquiring Kagome as to what was making her so happy?"

She just shook her head and chuckled, setting aside her own bowl of food – the only bowl that did not have any sleeping drought in it – and sat next to the monk. "It's really nothing. I don't know why you guys are so curious about it."

"Whatever," Inuyasha said, grabbing his bowl again and eating as many noodles as he could at once. "I'll bet it's just because her training's going so well."

"That's not it," she admitted. "I mean, yeah, I'm happy about that, but that's not why today is such a good day. Hey! What are you doing?"

She watched as Inuyasha leaned towards her, his golden eyes analyzing every little detail about her. She saw his gaze dart to her hair and skin, but she knew he wouldn't get anything out of that, especially because of how dirty she was from her earlier training. He looked at her clothes, but he had seen them before, since she had been wearing them the past few days so she could train without overheating. But then she saw the way his eyes turned to her hands, which were no longer preoccupied with making noodles, and she knew she was busted.

"I _knew_ it!" he cried. "You went home again, didn't you?"

She turned away from him and crossed her arms. "I don't know what you're talking about, Inuyasha."

"Your fingernails," he pointed. Whoops. He knew by now that she hated long and broken nails, and that whenever she went home, she made sure to get them filed and cleaned and back in nice shape again. It wasn't her fault she didn't get the chance to fix her nails the first time she went home. "You already went home a few days ago! What are you doing, goin' back again today?"

She glared at him, but she was still so ecstatic from earlier, she knew her glare was only half-hearted. "It's not like we're going anywhere, Inuyasha. What's wrong with going home once in a while?"

"You're gettin' too comfortable," he complained. "When Sango comes back and we go lookin' for shards again, you're gonna keep whining until we bring you home every week!"

"You know that's not true. Give me a break!"

"Kagome," Miroku interrupted, successfully stopping the little spat between the two and causing them to look at him blankly, "did something good happen while you were at home?"

She looked up at everyone and back into her bowl of soup. To heighten the suspense, something she thought was very dramatic but very funny, considering the expressions her friends always had on their faces when she did it, she took a bite from the noodles in her bowl, chewing them slowly and carefully. She savored the artificial flavoring and swallowed delicately, her face emotionless as she made no eye contact with anyone. She sensed all three of them leaning closer to her in desperation, and even Inuyasha stopped eating just to listen to her better.

"Well, it's just that…"

Inuyasha's ears twitched in anticipation, Shippou's tail swayed back and forth, and Miroku's eyes were widening already. She knew they were on the tips of their toes, leaning closer and closer and staring at her mouth, mentally preparing themselves for whatever she was going to say. And with a giant smile and glow in her eyes, she told them why today was one of the happiest days of her life:

"I passed my math class!"

Cheshire grin still on her face, Kagome watched as Inuyasha, Shippou, and Miroku fell face-first into their ramen.

She was glad they were so happy for her.

...

Chapter dedicated to: **alphaprincess0803**, who drew some fanart. I lovelovelove fanart, so thank you! (All submissions posted to my profile.)

A/N: It's been decades since my last chapter, I know. I've apologized countless times, and I'll do it again. Thanks to everyone who has been patient with me and is still reading! And muchhh love to the new readers too. (: I hope this chapter is satisfying enough (I've had so much trouble with it, which is why I haven't posted in so long), and remember to please review so I know I still have people tuning in!

And also, before you leave (cough-review-cough):**  
**Check out my **TWITTER** and **TUMBLR** and **DAILYBOOTH**.  
All links on my profile kthxbai!


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